if I get a little prettier can I be your baby?

If you ever need reassurance that you’re smart I’ll share the fact I found out rice isn’t a noodle and it’s actually a plant literally last year

Just to be clear I’m incredibly smart and I’m not selling myself short this just wasnt my best hot boy moment

Hey, I have a question. What are noodles made out of?

I was under the assumption that it was boiled bread.

Why would anyone boil bread that isn't bagels and why did I have to be punched in the guts twice by these revelations

Why are you boiling your bagels

Today I learned from 10 people that you make bagels by boiling them

you what

You what

[id: aggressive red all-caps text saying “THIS POST IS ABOUT KNUCKLES. DO NOT DERAIL”, flanked by pictures of the Sonic character Knuckles. end id]

thanks for adding the id but what the fuck

This should be considered a form of art.

Because it is. This was made by artist Foka Wolf. You can find more examples of his art on his instagram.

I wish there were different words for the different types of forgetting because  when I say I forgot something, I don’t mean “I forgot we had plans on Friday.” I almost always mean “I forgot today was Friday.” I know my friend’s birthday is on March 20th, but I won’t wish her happy birthday on time because I won’t know it’s March 20th on March 20th. My forgetfulness has nothing to do with not caring about/remembering events and everything to do with my inability to keep up with the passage of time.

My most common one is being 100% certain I did the thing already because the memory of doing it and the memory of intending to do it are the same mental images.

can you please elaborate on this

hey uhhhhhh OP. im begging you. tell us more

OP this is gonna keep me up at night

why must life have a grand purpose? is it not enough to have some basil, and mozzarella?

i can’t believe, 14 years later, we are presented with the greatest Bushism ever realized

He used to do something like this every other week. Until Trump got in, I never thought I’d see someone stupider in the office.