A dragon with the heart of a fish

God sometimes I'm writing smut and I'll like, delete a sentence because I'm like, no, I can't write that. It's too indulgent. And then it's like. Girl, what the fuck are you even going to the candy store for if you're just going to buy raisins. Get real.

"what the fuck are you even going to the candy store for if you're just going to buy raisins" is honestly the thing I needed to hear today

inspired: merfolk actually have very different concepts of gender to humans because they’re an entirely different species with their own unique culture

It’s a biological fact that fish do indeed change their sex to keep the male/female ratio balanced in their school population. So this fluidity actually makes more sense from a scientific standpoint than the silly idea that merfolk are born with a strictly assigned sex like humans.

Merfolk are all canonically genderfluid and we love them for that

OH MY GOD

So in the presence of a ship with an entirely or mostly male crew, nearby mermaids would become female to keep the balance.

That’s it. We figured out why everyone thinks merfolk are all women. Get a boat of fems out there and let’s see what they report.

my favorite thing paul does in interviews is when he mentions a beatles song and then starts singing it to make sure people know it, like he'll say "we were performing she loves you, you know 'she loves you yeah yeah yeah...'" like you literally don't have to do that. everyone knows that song. you are paul mccartney

My personal favorite is when he goes to tell and a story and he prefaces it with "you know, john and I- john lennon and I-" like yeah no we know that. we know who john is. you are the beatles

@alessmargi

thanks @seabiscus , you know me so well<3

Everyone say thank you sanitation workers we owe you our lives sanitation workers

Hannah Montana is fucked up because its entire POINT as a show is that children should be protected from fame and exploitation, but it stars a REAL little girl that's being exploited. Nearly every episode carries the looming threat of Miley being outed as Hannah and losing her peaceful teenage life to the ravages of fame. Her father in the show (played by her own father in real life) wisely protected her from the trauma of fame by making her wear a disguise and live a rather quiet, interview-free life. Meanwhile the REAL Billy Ray Cyrus sold his daughter to Disney Channel when she was 11 and forced her to read dialogue about how terrible it would be to face the public eye. Like... Jesus, dude. The fictional Robby Ray is 10x the father, and it's not even close. (It's also IMMENSELY funny that her dad doesn't use his real name in the show, while she does. Almost like he wanted a bit of a disconnect between his identity and his character. Something Miley didn't get.)

you solve the mystery of what to have for dinner one night and you think "hell yeah case closed forever" WRONG there is a dinner mystery the next night too

At the risk of sounding anti-intellectual, I think that college should be free and also not a requirement for employment outside of highly specialized career fields

At the risk of sounding like an effete intellectual, I do actually think you should be allowed to just take college courses indefinitely

his pathetic and emotionally repressed nature has enamoured me

if my mum gets home and i'm still not ready and gone that'd be embarrassing.