0% Coherence

"However, your partner -- JV -- is against the removal, citing public support for conservation"

My guy liked a political and poetical statement so much he utilised the law to keep it up

ohh so impossible. so so impossible. okay first step is to not be mid-depressive episode. if that's squared away:

caffeinate

change your environment

impose accountability. i recommend the strategy that i recommend to my undergrads on peer review workshop days: choose someone who seems capable of psychologically damaging you.

accountability but make it immediate. i will cowork with friends and we'll start by saying, in this 40m session i will.... and then if i don't do the thing i will have to explain myself. oof.

accountability but make it immediate, deranged, and panoptic. in moments of true desperation my virtual coworking friend and i will sometimes share our screens so we can actively surveil each other.

make it silly

break it up. there was a period last spring where i was KILLING it at stardewdoro, which is when you play one day of stardew valley and then do one task from your list, ad infinitum. this does require you to:

lower your standards, especially for quantity--sometimes i cannot face the Big Task but if i tell myself, actually the goal is not "start the chapter," the goal is

i am vastly more likely to attempt it. i made eye contact this morning and that got me started on making my tbr list, which is a separate task that is now less of a Thing because i already have it started.

atheist bpd girl: material conditions explain why people abandon me, a material flaw of my person