ya no sé

getting jabbed by one of those sexy unethical nurses w/ a giant syringe but then she deposits it into a giant syringe disposal box because she's not That unethical

The fact of the matter is that I do not want to do it

"do what?" you might wonder. well. [gestures broadly]

my body is a machine that turns normal situations into psychological horror

someone convince me that downloading PDFs is not actually the same thing as working on my dissertation

I just came out here to have a good time

indeed it does Umberto Eco 😔

guys can i be vulnerable. or will i be killed

one of my sexual fantasies is to have someone notice my absence and wonder about me

so funny that humans imagined a creature that is like a human but bigger and called it a “giant”. that’s such an uncreative name. that’s just an adjective. “it’s a giant!” “a giant what?!” “a giant… um. yeah. giant.”

god i fucking love language so much

"why is EVERY song about love" I'm begging you to dig just a tiny bit deeper, there's literally thousands of songs that aren't love songs. You don't even have to look for the most obscure underground artists ever, the fucking Beatles of all people have a song about a guy who kills people with a hammer

Im the guy who's getting all those pauses pregnant

everything. cost money

stop this