The Bloggity Blog

I know how it sounds, but like, bear with me.

I (28/F/former paladin), had been travelling with a cursed greatsword (Immeasurable/F/Sword) and was really into her for a long time. When we first met she told me she was the disembodied spirit of an ancient warlord and beamed images of a beautiful raven haired warrior in gorgeous blackened Gothic armor into my mind, she told me it was her true form and I was super into it so I forsook my paladin oath and we started hooking up

Early on in our relationship she was really supportive when I started to transition, telling me she was "nearing her apotheosis" as well. I didn't think much of it at the time, and dutifully listened to her when she told me to travel the kingdom and assemble the ritual objects for her ascension. There was a team of adventurers that tried to stop us and she told me to kill them but one of them was my former best friend Sir Roderick The Bold (25/M/Paladin) so I refused and only incapacitated them. She didn't like that and we had a huge fight about it after we'd left

Long story short after I'd done the ritual and assembled the artifacts she revealed her true form was a ruse and she was actually just a mass of tentacles and eyes (which I don't mean to yuck anybody's yum mentioning, it's just that tentacles don't really appeal to me lol)

She said she was going to consume the world, "starting with you" and that I had "outlived my usefulness". I felt really shocked and betrayed and helped the adventuring party that was following us around to defeat her and seal her back in the sword (which I left there), but I feel really bad about it

And sometimes, a bakery will advertise chocolate cake but its really just a vanilla cake with chocolate chips. And you take it, because at least its got chocolate but you just wish it was advertised properly.

And sometimes, people say that something is a vanilla chocolate chip cake but its not even chocolate! Its just sultanas that everyone thinks were meant to be chocolate, but the bakery never said it was going to chocolate, even if they never said it wasn't.

And whenever you go into a new bakery looking for chocolate cake, everyone looks at you weirdly and tells you to enjoy vanilla chocolate chip cake when maybe you don't want the focus to be on vanilla.

And when you DO get chocolate cake, its always the same kind. And you settle, because hey, beggars cant be choosers, right? Its always just white chocolate all the way through, no dark chocolate, no milk chocolate, not even a Mars bar on the side. It feels more like a vanilla cake, to be honest, regardless of the fact that its undeniably technically chocolate.

And you just wish that just once you could finish a chocolate cake and have it taste nice all the way through, especially with all the growing hatred towards chocolate in the world, but every time you order one, no matter how much you ask the waiter not to take it, or trust the chef not to make it taste bad at the center, you never get a good chocolate cake. And you can make your own, but its never going to be sold in bakeries.

it should be an explosive device, so they widen that part of the cave at the same time and no other spelunkers will get stuck there

They are still dehumanized, expendable, and have no life outside their purpose, but that purpose is espionage and social manipulation as well as murder. They have an inconspicuous name rather than a number. They can take care of themselves. You’d probably find them charming.

Living weapons that could operate on their own, undercover, for years. Who could escape and seem perfectly normal, even if it’s just another act. Who know to hide their injuries or else they’ll be “decommissioned”, but will expertly misdirect any questions along with just gritting their teeth and not showing that it hurts.