you know why

the author's extremely thoroughly advertised fetish that fundamentally enables the story

I have a bisexual guppy and its funny as hell to watch because it seems like he’s only bi out of desperation. Like all of the female guppies are unimpressed by him, and dont accept his mating displays, and every time he fails, he goes over to a SPECIFIC male guppy (the prettiest male guppy in the tank) like PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE and that male guppy always lets him????

i would read that fanfic ngl

About my fish??

Why are there like 5 daily chores where if you skip them for 2 days your life becomes a time based psychological thriller after

reverse gaslighting where i pretend to know exactly what you are talking about

“you’d fumble some girl asking for your star sign by going Um akshually it’s pseudoscience ☝️🤓” she’d fumble me by believing in astrology ngl

if vampires existed in real life i think there would be shady companies advertising "organic blood" sourced from "willing donors" who are coincidentally all poor people being paid like $5 per blood donation. and like haughty vegan vampires who only drink a synthetic blood drink thats brewed in a way thats actively worse for the enviroment. and radical traditionalist vampires who go on tiktok and claim that true alpha chads have to drain and kill people and anyone who leaves their victims alive is a liberal cuck. enter the world of hypothetical insufferable vampire politics with me.

I understand WHY, ethically and practically, you can't just keep whatever animal you want as a pet, but I also think that I, personally, should be allowed to adopt a colossal squid

big fan of characters with abandonment + attachment issues so profound that they leave claw marks in everything they touch but would sooner gnaw off their own leg than admit they just want someone to stay for once. in a totally normal well adjusted and not at all projecting way of course.

I actually do think it’s better for abusers and abusive characters to realize the harm their past actions caused and seek to do better than be literally or metaphorically executed for their crimes

Genuinely that's so fucking funny though

the number 1 rule of fanfic is have fun and be yourself. the number 2 rule is the average healthy adult male can lose roughly 2 liters of blood before dying.

Well, well, well. If it isn't the consequences of someone else's actions that I am directly impacted and severely affected by

Get an ask in my inbox -> read it -> "oh, that's nice; I need to think of a good response" -> "this deservea more attention than I can give it rn; I'll take another look at it later" -> close inbox until later -> "later" never really comes -> forget -> repeat

i do feel silly sometimes complaining about us-centrism online when im european like i hope nobody thinks i want things to be europe centric either. if anything i think we should pass the torch to brazil. theyve earned it.