The thing is to keep repairing and keep moving. Deliberately not caring if this is pretentious. He/Him. I am an adult. I reblog N/S/F/W; scroll or follow of your own responsibility. As a general rule I do not share crowdfunding requests/links.
If I can figure out how to pin this, an attempt at organizing my tags and keeping track of the exact wording
new: art adventures - rambling about process and techniques and stuff that isnt an actual art piece but is related.
People peopling - when humans are just being goofy doing people things.
Faith in humanity - stuff to counteract the feels that people are all awful
Weird art - this is a compliment. It stood out to me in a way that makes me want to save it so I can find it again and have thoughts about it.
Comment - i have reblogged with a proper reply
Tags - i have left a comment in the tags
Recc - something has twinged and i might look this up later
Laugh RULE - stuff that makes me laugh
Cat TAG - cats being cute and funny. Try not to mix these up.
Nona save - this is saving nona the ninth spoiler material for someone who hasnt read it yet.
Ambition - this is super cool and i maybe want to learn how to do this sometime
Decorate - like moodboard of cool shit basically?
Worldbuilding - this is a fun vibe, keeping it for creative works moodboard. This does not mean im gonna steal your fic or art or whatever, its just saved for maybe later going into the percolation process.
Mine - original post.
I think thats the main ones.
New one: soapbox. For when I realise Im suddenly standing on a soapbox and have been for some time.
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people still getting mad at this post i made in 2014 so I will add here. in 2026. that the point of this post isn’t “happy endings bad” its when the story’s only way to imagine a happy ending is a heterosexual nuclear family for everyone.
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they don't tell you this but when an event is advertised as "for all ages" they mean kids. they mean kids. if you, a grown-up, show up expecting to do the arts'n'crafts, you're the weirdo. even though they said "all ages."
great news everynyan, the event that inspired me to make this post in anticipation had an art'n'craft that WAS in fact for all ages, including grown-ups. (in fact it was mosaic-making from recycled glass, with the tools to cut pieces down to size yourself if needed, so it was decidedly for people of a certain age.)
I understand 100% where you're coming from and I have a rant on what the organizers probably meant by "all ages". This is coming from spending too many years running public festivals for anywhere from 100 to 20,000 people at every size of venue from school cafeteria to national convention center, though of course there are exceptions.
The organizers almost certainly really did intend that anyone of any age was welcome to participate in the activities. The problem, I have found, seems to come in 2 parts: the audience's socio-cultural expectations and how they respond to peer pressure (real or imagined), and the likelihood of who shows up at certain kinds of events depending on the regional demographics and how the event is advertised.
My rambling below the cut:
Take this with a grain of salt but I find it interesting and have spent a decade in arguments about it, so. The (US) audience for many hands-on / interactive events that appeal to both kids and adults, based on all the marketing data I have personally collected or paid tens of thousands of dollars for from third-party agencies, basically says that women ages 30-45 are driving almost all the social media views. Many of those women are trying to plan educational and fun excursions for their children ages 2-13.
The problem comes when you, the adult who is actually invited to participate in said activities, comes to an event with a lot of families with children ages 2-13. People with social graces will say: "I need to let the children enjoy this; it is uncomfortable if I take a spot from a child. Also if I am a man or otherwise have some caution I might be worried that as a solo adult surrounded by kids I will be seen as suspicious." So they just watch from a distance and then usually go home. Which to me sucks because there's often nothing inherent about the activity that makes it enjoyable only to kids.
But too many events don't seem to be at the stage of understanding you need to signal in 1) the advertising and 2) the actual physical setup that both adults and kids are welcome, or need separate stations, or hours that are for certain age groups. I think this is why a lot of museums started doing adult nights, especially science museums. If you ever go to the Exploratorium in San Francisco, this will be abundantly clear: the museum is genuinely designed to be fascinating to anyone from a preschooler to a postdoc but unless there's space to allow for all and curated exhibit design with big and small tables, for example, it triggers the mental block of "let the kids have this".
Anyway I spent a decade of my life arguing two things:
Built the event so that both kids and adults have separate and mixed space and train the activity leaders how to welcome and engage the whole spectrum of participants.
Recognize that sometimes you actually do need to provide a separate interaction time or space to make the adults feel welcome, especially childless adults, or at least signage to make sure everyone understands that no, it's actually the point.
I usually work on events that have "low threshold, high ceiling" activities so your mileage may vary. (Meaning: anyone can try doing the thing, even at a very basic or shallow level; the ones who want to go deep focus or discussion about what's behind the activity will find the presenters are VERY capable of talking details or having a back-and-forth about it all day.)
I had a really fun time running an event at a big public television station's festival where just as many adults without kids accompanying them did the activity as kids did, and stayed for a full hour or more as it really was pure fun, and also sensory-friendly compared to much of the other activities. I also wore myself out trying to argue with co-event organizers over the years that hands-on stuff really does appeal to everybody BUT sit-down performances and lectures usually really do have age categories, and it can be a big waste of money to try to combine the two in one mega-event if you don't have ticket revenue or reservations to judge interest by in advance.
That said, I definitely find more events run by neurodivergent people or audiences try harder to be welcoming – especially if the presenters get to engage in their special interests with all kinds of people.
I could write an essay on online or hybrid event design as well, featuring such sections as "you need to ASSIGN SOMEONE TO TELL THE ONLINE PEOPLE WTF IS HAPPENING AND MAKE SURE THEY CAN SEE/HEAR" and "people's attention spans rarely exceed one hour, and even that is a lot when online". Gretchen McCulloch did a really fabulous blog post series during the pandemic about taking LingCon online only and what they learned about event design. If you enjoy gatherings as much as I do, I also highly recommend Priya Parker's book The Art of Gathering because she basically point blank says what vibes and outcomes are you trying to achieve, does the event model you believe you need actually achieve those things (whether it's a baby shower or a happy hour or a conference), and what do the attendees actually want that would make them happy to be part of it.
why do so many freaks go right to “there should be exams or tests before you have kids” when the real solution is better social services, robust infant and child development education that is accessible both financially and schedule/distance accommodating, and resources throughout any stage of a child’s life. genuine question like did you think about any social development before going straight to eugenics
Look i am not even a proponent of parental testing measures. However. having *entire classes* on parenting, and "robust social services" (notoriously misused to steal kids) is much more eugenics-minded than having a simple 10 question test to assess that potential parents know that they should (1) feed shelter and clothe their children and (2) refrain from bullying or physically harming them.
I'm going to copy the answer i gave to your anon here so that everyone can be a little more educated about eugencists and the sort of propaganda they might put on tumblr!
do you know why eugencists believe they have a right to decide who can and cannot become parents? It is because they falsely believe that they can create an "improved" or "perfect" version of humanity, both biologically and culturally. You seem to know of one method they use (social control of reproduction), and it is important that you know they use many others! In particular, they seek to control social norms, and often believe there is 1 correct way to behave in any scenario. They are incredibly focused on maintaining their cultural traditions, and believe they have a moral obligation to destroy other people's cultural traditions. Eugenicists use "education" as cultural indoctrination and a tool of destruction of human cultural diversity. How does this relate to parenting?
Child-rearing, and therefore parenting, is a form of cultural tradition. Whether parents even raise their children themselves in a nuclear family model is culturally situated… some cultures use communal child rearing, some rely on extended family kinship ties, some cultures have designated caretakers who may be seen more as family or more as servant or more as employee. It just depends. So yes, parenting classes are just as eugenics-minded as having an exam, because they would have the effect of prioritizing and standardizing a culturally-dominant form of childrearing over others.
Also, I must point out that in our culture, whether or not you pass a class is usually determined by an exam… so
Your tags are SOOO telling. So you actually are just a eugencist trying to covertly spread propaganda online. No, child sexual abuse and child physical abuse are not part of anyone's culture, and they don't magically become ok if someone claims that. But the fact is that you went on the internet and with seemingly zero prompting decided to start pushing nazi talking points, and now you're using one of the most basic rehashed nazi talking point in favor of eugenics (" in those backwards other cultures they think child abuse and molestation are ok! That's why we have to teach them better!" ) tells me all I need to know. If you aren't aware you are a white supremacist this is your wake up call that you seem to believe what they believe. And you aren't helping children.
Big disagree there is *nothing* to admire about nazis or white supremacists or racists or eugenicists.
Lets just not go there. Not even as a joke. You're not immune to falling into a cult I'm not immune to falling into a cult, it starts with super normal behaviours and opinions and then the pot starts boiling and you don't notice. Do not jump into the pot as a joke because the water looks cold, it is not, this is already not normal behaviours or opinions. Yes Im being a party pooper on your joke, because thats a dangerous party to attend. There is *nothing* to admire about eugenicists. There is nothing to be gained from them.
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just finished this month's book club book, went skimming goodreads reviews afterwards as you do, got my breath taken away by this absolutely brutal ending to one of the multi-paragraph 1 star reviews
I did enjoy that the treehouse hideout in the beginning exclusively had elevators. I could actually imagine myself there, which is kind of a rarity in speculative fiction. I think that does fall on the vibes side of the thing though.
just finished this month's book club book, went skimming goodreads reviews afterwards as you do, got my breath taken away by this absolutely brutal ending to one of the multi-paragraph 1 star reviews
hair colour: dark brown / favourite colour: purple, the colour of nightshade petals (wouldn't you know) / favourite drink: a strong coffee. hot, iced, frozen, sublimated, gaseous. however it comes. i gave it up for months after i first got sick in the hopes that it was the culprit, and now i'll savour every sip / one thing i love about myself: i have a knack for asking questions no one else thinks of / if i could be any animal: why the swift winged magpie, so i could warn of sorrow if i was alone, and deep secrets if i was among friends (y'all know the rhyme right?) / dream place to visit: i'd return to seattle where i first got sick if ever i got the chance, and the wild lands of scotland. but if i had to pick somewhere new, i'd pick the ruins of babylon. i'd probably be disappointed, because there isn't much to see these days, but i want to see it just once / what am i looking forward to: a day when i'm able to finish the research project ive been working on / my biggest dream: once was to become an author, much like prev, and i'd written several books on my way there. i think that probably is a dream i have buried somewhere down there still, but these days i just want to be able to climb trees again and run along sea cliffs / songs i have on repeat; so damn dangerous (dea matrona), helena (mcr), goodbye (biffy clyro), the devil - inside (fit for rivals), this is to mother you (sinead o'connor), take me back (sarah jarosz), the ballad of lucy jordan (marianne faithful) / haven't been doing so well (frank turner) / white flag (dido)
tagging: without any pressure @iluvgargoyles @i8chocolatecake @dandelion-de-deus @justanotherchangeling @mortem8moth @softness-and-shattering and whoever can see the moon right now
An idea I had for a while now is building a fantasy world chronologically. The first book takes place in pre-history, following a group of hunter-gatherers.
There's little to no lore because it hasn't happened yet.
How did people come to be? Do they have some kind of creation myth? Do they not have stories about their grandparents? Surely hunter-gatherers had stories that just didnt survive. Or is it like, theyre the first created/cloned/etc generation and theyre aware of that? What angle are you coming qt this from?
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