SleepyLavender

being a kid and hearing adults say stuff like "woah 2011 was 4 years ago haha" didn't really convey the fucking horror of a youtube video crossing my recommended labelled "9 years ago" and it's from 2017. that's not true. 9 years ago is 2010 or something. don't lie.

Is it just me, or is the trope of the medieval knight fighting a dragon not as prevalent in old stories as we tend to assume? The classic European dragon-fighting stories I can name off the top of my head involve a Roman soldier (St. George), a handful of Greek heroes (Perseus, Heracles, and Jason), and a couple of Norsemen (Beowulf and Sigurd). Of all these, St. George is the only one who has gotten dressed in medieval trappings posthumously. Maybe there's a bunch of old medieval European stories which have knights fighting dragons that I don't know about, but it's funny that the dragon-fighting stories I do remember don't have medieval knights as the heroes.

dw ive seen how this goes its gonna be soooo fine

PLEASE LET PREMINGER WIN THIS WHOLE THING PLEASE IT WOULD BE SO FUCKING FUNNY

YOU DONT UNDERSTAND HOW BAD I NEED MICHAEL TO MAKE IT FAR IN THIS YOU DONT UNDERSTAND

*sigh* fine, fine, i'll be the new doctor who showrunner. bring me two twinks, britain's tallest woman, and 1000 pounds worth of alumininamian foil

the role of the person in the passenger seat is not only navigator but secretary as well. you have to type up the drivers messages to random ladies on facebook about cbd cream & google whether that billy joel song was the theme song for that show or not

you also have to provide a henchmans disdainful scowl at whoever the driver is flipping off in the target parking lot

You should never forget the Tommy Gun

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i'm like a fujoshi but for dead people

question. why do you have 7 featureless grey monoliths in your driveway

There's eight actually but the last one is still in the garage

question. why do you have eight featureless grey monoliths

They're actually a really dark purple

question. why do you have seven featureless really dark purple monoliths in your driveway and an eighth in the garage

Some of them do have features though. There's holes and hinges and stuff, so I can put secrets in em

question. why do you have 8 really dark purple occasionally featureful monoliths

The heart wants what the heart wants

this reads like a muppet sketch

You're not wrong

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they look like the boxes people paint to look like bookshelf's or something to work as set props for black box shows am i the only one who thinks that?

We as the TMA fandom have so many amazing ship names like "DoorKeay" "Dyhard" "What The Girlfriends" and "Terminal Velocity" and we still use Jmart.. Which would be fine if "CloudyVision" "EyesTea" "Teaholding" and EVEN "LonelyEyes" if you were to give the old men the name "Eye Eye Captain" (seaweed is also an honourable mention) didn't exist.

not to be insensitive but some of the salem witch trials were so funny bitches like “i saw her at the devils sacrament!!!” girl... what were YOU doing at the devils sacrament 👀

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