so tired but also hungry

Please remember this St Valentine's day to celebrate all of Ol Val's patronages: Bees and Beekeepers, The Isle of Lesbos, people with epilepsy, people who really don't want to faint, and, of course, plague.

mercury is in reverse cowgirl again

Toddler accidentally cursed himself into an identity crisis today.

He’s been crossing stuff out with chalk. He asked me to write his name for him, crossed it out, and had a panicked meltdown because he thought it meant he didn’t exist any more.

Every hour or so he asks me “am I [his name?]” and wants reassuring hugs.

I’m enjoying the implication that he was perfectly delighted with arbitrarily erasing things from existence until it affected him personally

That’s just how toddlers are.

bugs bunny taught me that murder is okay if you’ve been inconvenienced in any way

Weird peeve time. Calling lab grown gemstones “fake” is stupid because it’s the same shit just not formed naturally. An artificially grown diamond is the same shit as a natural diamond it is the exact same material bro it’s all fuckign carbon

It’s carbon it’s pretty and it didn’t involve slave labor what’s not to love??? Hi I’m having geology opinions tonight apparently. And I’m right

There is so much bullshit in the diamonds industry to be mad about tbh. It also ties into the bullshit of the wedding industry as a whole but we don’t have the time to unpack all that

not even going to lie, the day i learned i could get like 15 lab grown rubies the size of dimes for $20 is the day i spent $20 on rubies, and i have never once said to myself “man, i wish this cost $1,600 and the lives of eight children to produce”

We are a pro-lab-grown mineral blog here, not only is it massively cheaper but massively more ethical as well in many cases.

Also it’s just cool to think of some mad scientist lookin person doing shit against the law of the universe and making pretty gems for you. Like cmon. This shouldnt be allowed probably. But humans really be like on gOD i want some shiny an just started MAKIN em

for years people wanted alchemy, well now we have alchemy and we’re making gemstones out of it and suddenly “it doesn’t count” anymore

Working in food service is so surreal because like... nothing I do for people is anywhere close to life and death, but some customers absolutely act as though it is. I look a woman dead in the eye and solemnly inform her that unfortunately we are out of oat milk, and I see her heart shatter in front of me, right there at the bakery counter at 8 in the morning. I feel like a handsome TV surgeon informing someone that their beloved fiancée died on the table. He’s gone... I’m so sorry. We lost him. We are out of oat milk

people like op are the ones that get memorialized in folk tales for outwitting the devil

So I’m gonna kill your wife

this is my favorite reply on this post because for a moment I forgot the creature kills victor’s wife and i thought you were threatening me

maybe you should kiss a cat on its tiny little head then you'll feel better

ptah! ptah!! hair in my mouf

Pitch: a muppet movie where the muppets play D&D, and it cuts between the muppets around the table and the fantasy being acted out, but instead of it just being the muppets dressed up in D&D fantasy costume, it's celebrity actors but the muppets do the voices, and the actors have to act how those muppets would. Imagine a barbarian played by Jason Mamoa voiced by Miss Piggy.

oH. OH I WANT THIS BADLY.

what if one person at the table is a normal human but in the DnD game they're a muppet?