Dean is an aro apl a-hole

I think I'll go nice and broad here. It's pride month, so talk about absolutely any LGBTQIA+ headcanon you have for supernatural. How did the Winchester of your choosing discover they were attracted to the same gender? Which side character was definitely stealth trans? Who do you know in your heart was aspec or intersex? And etc. You have free rein to spread whatever gospel you want, whether it explicitly contains any wincest or not, as long as it is queer

-@schizosamwincester

oh man where to start (ignore that im practically a week late)

sam- demisexual 100%, he needs some kind of connection, one night stands are not for him. i like to think hes open to any gender but tends to have a preference for women, but that might just be the urge to be canon-compliant in me. but i AM a sucker for the idea that he played around at stanford, giving and taking up the ass

dean- he dont like labels yk? he wants to believe hes a strong-willed red-blooded american who only fucks women, but i like to think he's not as straight and narrow as he tries to be. i also like the hc that hes aromanitc, but that could be projection

cas- i know that jimmy is a cis male but i like to think cas is bare, like a barbie doll. he walks that line between pansexual and aroace, all or nothing and hes not sure which it is

as for side characters:

ok the thing I like most about this is all of the nullification talk has been about late seasons Sam, which is when I think he'd really want to not have a dick

What if eventually, he gets tired of waiting for Sam's hunter instincts to kick in, because clearly Sam's gotten rusty if he hasn't woken up yet, so he makes his silent (maybe not-so-silent, maybe he's making a bit of noise on purpose because he wantsneedshungers to feel Sam against him like he used to, when they were younger and sparring) way to the bedroom. What if he pauses at the door, open just a crack, because those sounds are muffled but quite clearly involved and Dean's never had a chance to walk in on Sammy with a girl before. Walk in on Sammy naked, sure, that was inevitable with how they grew up. Walk in on Sammy jerkin' it, yeah. That was also inevitable (especially when he was trying to, needed desperately to see Sam when he was lost in pleasure, loose and wanton and so so forbidden). But Sammy with a girl? Heck, for all Dean knows, Sam left for college a virgin (thank god).

What if Dean peeks through the crack in the door, and suddenly he can't breathe because those sounds are muffled because Sam's biting a pillow, knuckles white where he's holding fistfuls of it, and a blonde goddess with a leather halter on her hips is thrusting into him and they're glistening with sweat in the moonlight and all Dean can think about is how much he hates that woman, how much he wants to be the one holding Sam's waist in a bruising grip, how much he wants to feel Sam tight and hot around him.

What if Dean sees the woman - Jess, her name is Jess, his stalking has taught him that much - lean down, what if Dean hears her say "you like that, baby brother?" and what if Sam's cry as he comes gets Dean harder than diamonds and Dean has to leave, has to get out now because if he doesn't...

if he doesn't...

god, if he doesn't he might have to pull her off of Sam, because that should be him and Sam knows it and clearly she knows it too.

And for the non-medical nerds, Klinefelter's means XXY chromosomes. They're generally born with typical male genitalia, but then they generally don't get normal male testosterone levels at puberty and will have elevated estrogen levels. So common traits include infertility, gynecomastia, low body hair, more feminine features, development delays, lower muscle tone, and for some reason, being extremely tall. Like. I've had a patient with it. And Jesus. His ass was about the same height as my head. That level of tall.

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It's the "straight" part. That's the problem. Even if Dean Winchester only likes girls, even if he doesn't have any non-familial feelings for Sam or John, even if he's completely heterosexual, Dean Winchester is still fundamentally queer. Because Dean Winchester is deeply aromantic.

The underlying narrative in a lot of these posts is that Dean is just a regular straight guy except for his incestuous desires, and like, yes, people can headcanon and write whatever they want, but as someone who is aromantic and allosexual, I just don't buy that. Sure, he loves girls. He wants to fuck girls a lot. He also displays absolutely no evidence of any romantic attraction for them. Even though he doesn't know the word aromantic and I'm sure he dies completely unaware of it, he would still be aware that he's Different.

I remember being 14 and having the thought "am I gay? I know I like guys, but I feel like I don't like them enough." Likewise, even if Dean has never, ever felt anything towards a man, he's at least going to have noticed that the way he feels about women is different than the way other men do. I mean, look at the biggest example of a heterosexual relationship in his life: his parents. Dean doesn't understand being so deeply in romantic love with a woman that 22 years later, he's still trying to avenge her. That's simply not a feeling that he has. I think by age 26, out of all his encounters with women, he will have noticed.

Don't get me wrong. If he's straight, I still do absolutely think he'd take issue with being called queer or gay. He'd still maintain that Sam doesn't count. He still would express disgust at the idea of having sex with any other man. All of that is still true. But just because he would try and keep up the facade that he's a normal straight guy doesn't mean that I want to. I know better.

This feels good, god this feels good. It feels so good.

Anyone would give most, if not all of, anything to have Jessica Moore on her knees in front of them. She's everything the movies say California girls are: tall and tan with sun-lightened hair and a picture-perfect smile. She's everything locker room boys say good cocksuckers are: enthusiastic and confident with a well-timed twist and the deepest deepthroat he's ever felt.

It feels good and Sam is nauseous, one handed twisting firm but careful into Jess' mess of curls, looking at the wall covered in art they picked at a local craft fair in Palo Alto.

It feels good, but he's never liked having his dick played with, not really. It makes his skin hot and tight; makes him think about Oklahoma and how the plains truly do stretch from border to border, only interrupted by the earthfuck of oil rigs and the occasional McDonald's rising up like some executive had decided the land needed more height variation.

Dean is extremely self-aware. It's easy to forget that he knows about his problems and bad coping mechanisms and general neuroses because he generally doesn't do anything to fix them, but he absolutely does know about them. Here. Have some quotes to prove it:

No Exit (2x06):

Jo, you've got options. No one in their right mind chooses this life. My dad started me in this when I was so young... I wish I could do something else.

Jump the shark (4x19):

You know, I finally get why you [Sam] and Dad butted heads so much. You two were practically the same person. I mean, I worshipped the guy, you know? I dressed like him, I acted like him, I listen to the same music. But you were more like him than I will ever be. And I see that now.

The End (5x04):

I was wrong. Dean. I was wrong. I'm begging you. Say yes. But you won't. 'Cause I didn't. Because that's just not us, is it?

There are definitely more, but these were the ones that were easiest to find because I wrote "self-aware" in my notes.

Dean has a lot of time to think. He routinely drives for twelve hours straight. He keeps a lot of his baggage to himself, and that means the thoughts are stuck rattling around in his brain instead. He can examine himself and his feelings and his problems over and over and over again. Just because he doesn't cope with them the way someone who's having these revelations in a therapy session would doesn't mean that he hasn't figured them out.

So with all that in mind, with how well Dean does actually understand himself... Why wouldn't he have noticed that he views sex and romance in a fundamentally different way than the people around him? The two biggest figures in his life, Sam and John, both loved women so much that they went on massive revenge quests after they died. They let their romantic love for people who were already dead completely uproot their lives. Surely Dean has noticed he's never felt that way about anyone, not even the hookups and situationships he liked the most.

Dean knows who he is. He knows that he's the hookup guy. He avoids baggage, strings, and feelings at every opportunity. It would make a lot of sense for him to do that because he's figured out that he just doesn't feel the same way about women as they usually do about him.

Dean Winchester is Dean Winchester on purpose. It's easy to forget that when you're someone who would never choose to be like that, but he very much did. So even if he does not have the vocabulary that we do and thus can't explicitly call himself aro, it makes sense for him to have created the "love 'em and leave 'em" part of his persona precisely because he knows he doesn't have romantic feelings towards anyone.

All that said, the pace at which he accepts it is definitely variable. He obviously knows he isn't interested in romance right from when we meet him in Season One, but he might not have come to the realization that other people actually are. It is probably a revelation that happens in stages, and I think there's a lot of wiggle room for when those happen and how he comes to terms with it. There's time for denial (I've definitely felt things for women, actually) and bargaining (other people can't possibly feel all that) and all that jazz.

spoiler he loses

It's my birthday today, so let's shake things up. Instead of me asking you something, respond to this with a question that you want me to answer! And I will get to talk everyone's ears off all day. No limits or anything; just go for it.

- @schizosamwincester

HAPPY (belated) BIRTHDAY !!!!!!!

hmmmmmmmm

So I'm going to use this as an opportunity to make an argument that's been in the back of my head for a bit, but I haven't actually gotten around to posting about yet.

Lisa is the best partner/match for Dean, because she understands him well enough to not try and make it last.

Lisa sees right through Dean to a degree that's... Like... I feel like it's kind of emblematic of the shows problems with women, honestly. They don't really understand how to write female characters, and so they just write her as perfect. She understands everything about Dean because like, isn't that what women are supposed to do? They're supposed to be good at all this emotional stuff. Obviously they can't fail to understand their men. Then they wouldn't be A Good Girlfriend. That's what good girlfriends do.

But. Taking Lisa as she is written, it is simply a fact that she understands Dean at his core. She knows he's not the kind of guy to stick around and never will be. That's why she tells him Ben isn't his kid. That's why when he asks to hook up again, she tells him absolutely not. When Sam comes back, what does she say? That she knows he's a hunter and not a construction worker, and so he should just go. That she knows a tied-down family man isn't who he is, and they can make it work this way, but she knows she can never make him stay.

Dean is a fundamentally aromantic character. Across the whole series, he shows a lot of desire to hook-up with women, but never the desire to actually settle down or date. Not romantically, and not platonically, either. And when he connects with Sam and Bobby again, he makes it very clear that he didn't want a stable partner and a happy home. He wanted Sam. And the only reason he actually went to Lisa and Ben and stayed with them is because Sam told him to.

Lisa is the best partner for Dean because she understands that there is no ideal romantic partner for Dean. That isn't who he is, and he never will be. As they say, "if you love something, let it go." And she does. Because ultimately, what Dean needs out of a love interest is for them to understand that they will never be what he wants or come first in his life.

So yeah. That's my hot take.

Who the hell still goes on about a hookup they had 9 years ago? Like. Okay. With Dean it makes sense. He has no life outside of hunting, Sam, and sex. I can understand Dean still being like "If I'm going to die, I want to fuck Lisa again first." But Lisa has a life. She has a child and friends and a stable job. What woman with all of those things talks about one weekend nine years ago so much that when Dean appears everyone is like "oooo. That's the guy she always talks about." I don't think an alloromantic woman would talk that much about a hookup that presumably had nothing romantic about it to her respectable married friends. The best night of an alloromantic woman's life would probably involve a boyfriend and romance, not just crazy sex. Which brings us to my next point.

She deliberately sought out guys who are not going to be available for romance. When she says that Dean isn't Ben's father, it was some other unattached drifter, she also says, "I had a type. Leather jacket, couple of scars, no mailing address." And yeah, a lot of us think she was lying about the first part, but there's no real reason for her to lie about the second. Which, as an aromantic allosexual? What a fantastic strategy. 10/10. And like, let's be really clear here: looking at what we know of the timeline of her life, she went right from picking up guys who would never be anything other than one nights stands to being a single mom and presumably being way too busy for that. For all we know, she might never have actually had a romantic relationship ever until Dean.

She seems really happy with being a single mother. Like... If I got pregnant by someone I knew I was never going to see again, I would be going to Planned Parenthood because I know I couldn't handle that alone. Lisa could have gotten an abortion. She didn't. That raises the possibility that she wanted to be a single parent, potentially even more than she'd want to have a kid with a partner. That's true for some aromantic people. Hell, while now I wouldn't want that because I'm just way too disabled for that, as an aro kid I had multiple different fantasies about it. Like, usually in media being a single mom is trashy and depressing and sad. It's honestly really interesting that Supernatural, the misogyny show, has such a positive depiction of it with Lisa.

She consistently understands Dean and his thought processes and priorities incredibly well. It's easier to get people if they're similar to you. And I think anyone seeing this post probably already agrees that Dean is aromantic.

The entire dynamic of Lisa and Dean getting back together is... weird? To be clear, their relationship up to that point is: a) they hook up once, b) a decade later, he saves her kid, c) a year and a half later he shows up on her doorstep crying and then leaves, d) he comes back and she lets him live with her as her partner for a year. That is not the normal trajectory of a relationship. At no point is there any dating there. But if you ask me, it makes a lot of sense for an aro who doesn't really understand romantic relationships to begin with.

I'm leaving list format now so I can really dig into this. Let's start with a personal anecdote from me. When I was in high school, there was this guy. He was pretty lonely because he was disabled and, you know, kids are assholes. It was pretty well-known that he would ask out pretty much any girl who was ever friendly with him. And like, not in a creepy way—if you said no, that was that. He was more than happy to stay friends. Most of his friends were girls in fact, and they'd pretty much all gotten asked and then moved on. Anyway. I got asked. And unlike all the other girls, I went "well. Relationships are a thing people do. I think he's attractive, and that's all crushes are, right? Sure, I'll say yes." I didn't bother examining if I actually had romantic feelings for him (I didn't think those existed, I thought all crushes were purely about attraction to someone's appearance), I just went with it. Needless to say, I didn't know I was aromantic yet.

I'm not convinced that Lisa knows she's aromantic, either. I think when she did all her hookups, she told herself, "I'm just young and having fun and don't want to be tied down right now." And then once Ben was around, she said that she was just too busy for a relationship. A lot of aromantics and asexuals continually push off realizing that they don't want the same things as other people with excuses like "oh I'm just too young for that" or "I'm too busy with school" or "I'm trying to get started with my career" and it takes them a really long time to realize that even when all of those aren't true anymore, they still don't actually want romance and/or sex. I think because Lisa went right from "I'm too young" to "I'm too busy parenting," she probably still hasn't had that realization. She assumed that eventually she'd find the right guy and want to settle down. And then Dean Winchester ended up right in front of her, and she went "I guess this is it."

If we look back at 3x02, her first reaction to the idea of having anything to do with Dean again is "hell no." That makes sense. I think that's the normal reaction if a hookup suddenly wants to get together after eight years. She only changes her tune because he's really good with her kid. He wishes Ben was his own kid, even. And when that's the case? Well, Ben could use a male role model. She's always wanted that for him. And it would be nice to have a coparent. Plus hey, Dean needs this too. He could use a place to stay and a thing to do and someone to support him. Ben would have a Mom and a Dad like he's supposed to, and Lisa would have a boyfriend, like she always said she would eventually when she got around to it. There's a great opportunity for everyone right in front of her. She might as well go for it.

At no point do either her or Dean realize that actual feelings for each other played no part in it. They both wanted to be coparents who were friends and fucked, and they both figured "hey, that's basically what romantic relationships are, right?" They didn't mean to seek out an aro4aro QPR arrangement—they just both fell into it and assumed it was normal.