FIRST I PARK MY CAR

swordfinalFINAL(2)

Do you think cavemen ever got humiliated and had the kms urge? Like "Grug so embarrassed, Grug jump into tar pit" and then Glarg is like "Noooo everyone forget soon" and Grug is like "Grug going to do it for real"

@robovader

I’m not sure I knew the thy/thine distinction. Thanks for this!

Finally “usted” in English.

"lock in" is probably one of the most important phrases to enter the public lexicon in the 2020s

instead of either having a server be muted or unmuted discord should introduce a setting called special princess mode where the server is muted except ☝🏽 for one person that is your special princess and the emoji0oo990op09iop09i8o09i8op09iolp-09op-0opyujiko8o9i8ukol9iukolp9i8uki sorry. i got a drop of oil on my keyboard bc i was eating hummus with a little bit of olive oil earlier and i was cleaning that off. anyway and the notification icon is a heart. and they have to to call it that.

Technically most moss is outside the international space station

wha t if oregon trail was called wagon age: oregons

This made me so angry the first time I saw it I’m reblogging it again.

happy 10 years to wagon age oregons

tragic when a thing gets hate for being 'woke trash' and you look into it and its not even that woke. like cmon man i was promised monacle popping gay commie propaganda. this is just a video game with a woman in it.

something something extremely sexy when magic users resort to physical violence. yeah i have the power of god and anime on my side but i also have THESE HANDS. i cast Punch You In The Face. i take my magic staff through which i channel the vast energies of the elements and the cosmos and i cast Severe Concussion And Skull Fracture. casting time for xenoglossy too long, chose the quicker route of Stab You In The Throat.

*walks up to gay couple* So which of you is the taciturn one who's a lot smarter than they pretend to be and which of you is the talkative one who uses big words incorrectly?

*walks up to gay couple* So which of you is the taciturn one who's a lot smarter than they pretend to be and which of you is the talkative one who uses big words incorrectly?

the position of the mischevious pig marks the hours

then what

Baby sphinx trying to be like mama and waylaying travelers, but all its riddles are completely non-sensical like the ones a 1st grader would tell

[ID: Tags by @/playwrong that say, "#BABY SPHINX: what are…um…the seven…turtles—and they are all have BIG hands #and there is a…man…who is the big man #and um. what is the turtle‘s—how OLD—who is it? #TRAVELER: I give up? #BABY SPHINX: It’s George The Fart!! hahahaha #(gnaws ineffectually at the traveler’s shin)". End ID]

youve heard of missionary position. now get ready for MERCENARY position