I'll Be Having My Body Back You Undead F*ck

haters will see you rotating the perfect sphere, yet not visually perceive the rotation due to said sphere’s lack of imperfections, and say you cant rotate a sphere

“No Charles, I will not be taking criticism” I say whilst making direct eye contact with my WWI soldier ancestor’s portrait hanging on the wall in full view of me wearing my uniform with tiny shorts posing like an Edwardian renter in front of my phone taped to a tripod at 2:26 AM

Show stopping talented unique never done before I LOVE IT

There’s something so inherently mystical about swimming to the bottom of a pool to retrieve something. Just gracefully swooping down with a purpose and puttering to the quiet bottom. I mean, yeah, I’m probably retreaving a lost toe ring or one of those soggy water ball things, but damn if I don’t feel like a mermaid princess searching for hidden treasure.

How the fuck did they put an image into an ask

They figured out how to insert an image into an ask and THAT's what they go with?

I’M CRYING WHY IS THIS SENDING ME

You’re standing in the exact location a businessman realized that what’s truly important, is family.

Sea salt, garlic, rosemary and black pepper banish evil. They also season chicken.

Or perhaps it is the evil in the chicken we must defeat?

This is why chicken soup is one of the most powerful potions you can make.

Chicken soup banishes most evils.

gets a game over and throws the controller and it circles around and hits me in the head and I die and my family sues apple for millions

this came out in 1996 and it sucked

reblog for noises

siamangs are so freaking weird. Somehow evolution produced a frog-ape.

*Noise that’s a cross between a bicycle horn and a dog’s squeaky toy*