just got jumpscared at work today

roma★
almost home
let's talk about Bridgerton tea, my ask is open
he wasn't even looking at me and he found me
Lint Roller? I Barely Know Her
trying on a metaphor

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Today's Document
DEAR READER
Misplaced Lens Cap

Origami Around
Acquired Stardust
2025 on Tumblr: Trends That Defined the Year

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Keni
Xuebing Du

titsay

blake kathryn
we're not kids anymore.
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@pinnithin
just got jumpscared at work today

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dj multiple orgasms wants to keep the vibe going
I think the purest form of love is just wanting someone to notice life with you. "taste this. look at that. hear this song." again and again. until you can't imagine noticing life without them.
Unless you speak whatever the language in this is (maybe Russian? It sounds at least related to Russian), you won’t understand exactly what they’re saying
You will however, understand exactly what they’re saying from the context of the video
And you will get to hear this person’s wonderful laughter
Sound definitely needs to be on
Sounds like German to me, but this is hilariously bad planning.
It’s definitly not german, but god i need to know who planned this bathroom
it is 100% Russian, and i am wheezing in the same language now
going to attempt a rough translation because this is so funny to me
it’s not going to be very literal because trying to translate every mumbled phrase and conversational word will be Very Annoying
“So here’s your–here’s our hotel room. The door to the bathroom is clear, so you enter the bathroom, and everything’s normal, you look at yourself, and everyone who’s in the hallway can see you. And over here’s the shower, it’s relatively private. You enter the shower, and like wash yourself– *breaks down laughing* Well okay okay, you decide to wash your hands, or sit down on the toilet and– *another fit of laughter* Fine, fine, it’s actually all okay because you grab this and you…uh, and you’re like ‘I want some privacy’”, and you close–you close the curtain, and then you close this curtain– *laughs* And you close that curtain too, and now you want to sit on the toilet and you’re like ‘Okay everything’s closed, you can’t see in", and so you sit down on the toilet– *intense laughter*“
The Beholding
modern social media should stop offering "sync with your phone contacts to follow them" options and start offering "block all your phone contacts so they never see your account" options

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I wish I could have heard you sing this… I bet you have a beautiful voice
Calling it the Belle Epoque makes about as much sense as calling WW1 great, but at least the clothes slapped.
No bond stronger than a disabled girl and her disabled cat
i have a Persian agenda where i encourage every man i know to grow the longest and prettiest hair possible
personal agenda. Personal.
i’m speechless. there’s a guy for everything.
this is the future liberals want

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Today's Seal Is: WAKE UP EVERYBODY!!! GOOD FACKING MORNING!!!
if u get second job i'll you
YOU'LL ME??
endless torment
Tommys Forever Childhood
aye can i get uh………ingredients on my burger
beetroot?
you want beetroot?
you want fucking beet root?
ingredience

Anya is live and ready to show you everything. Watch her strip, dance, and perform exclusive shows just for you. Interact in real-time and make your fantasies come true.
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(having a good week) that’s right. the goal is to increase my baseline. make the spirals shallower until they spin lazily on the surface of the water, lose their suction. im not trying to fix it all at once, im trying to incrementally improve my way into something tolerable. and once im there maybe i can shoot for good
(having a bad week) and in my terrible forge i will temper the flames of ruin
Receiving a Werther’s Derivative from my poser grandma