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i feel like i’m cursed forever but other than that i’m doing alright

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arctic-hands

When I was a teenager and still on Neopets I was part of a pretty big Star Trek guild and eventually became part of its council, with the solemn duty of creating weekly polls. Well one day I created the poll "Which would win in a fight? Borg Cube or Death Star?". Naturally, since this was a Star Trek guild, the answer was overwhelmingly "Borg Cube", but someone did have the rationality to point out we were biased.

So I look up a pretty prominent Star Wars guild and message one of their council and ask them to poll the same question and get back to me in a week. They do, and naturally the fuckin geeks said "Death Star".

So then I look up a Stargate guild and messaged the lead council member, saying the same thing, and they get back to me almost immediately saying that the Death Star would immediately one-shot a Borg Cube but they would never be able to do it again to another Cube. And I took that wisdom back to my guild and we were mollified, and for one moment the Nerd World was peaceful.

evilsoup

gilliagandy

Truly thrilled to finally find this post on my dash.

scarlct-vvitch

project hail mary is insane bc the first half is like oh my god the world is dying and there's alien bacteria eating the sun and there's some guy alone on a ship and he's having a breakdown and the flashbacks are getting darker and this is a tragedy the likes of which i have never seen. then BAM andy weir says fuck you actually. here's this pokemon guy he's here to save the day with the power of friendship. and it's the best thing you've ever seen in your life

cognitohazardous

no one says big mood anymore. no one even says mood. no one says anything. all thats left is a dry wind, that scours my face until i bleed

pauls1967moustache

I think the Beatles would’ve been happier if they were tiny and they lived in a sewing kit in Brian’s house and they all slept inside the same empty box of cigarettes and they got to play sold out gigs for the mice

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fibro-memes

hot girls watch free willy to trigger an emotional release

#werda rambling

ring2002

sexually repressed people be like “i have an ancient evil stirring within me. no one can know” and its literally just craving intimacy

#Ilya

neverwonderneverremember

sleep is stolen time. don't let them take it from you anymore. tonight. we are staying up. til one billion o clock.

novahazard24

get your medals everyone

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depsidase

tahthetrickster

#me being waterboarded by assignments

kalgalen

"this character acted irrationally and i don't like it :/" people act irrationally in real life all the time. why do you want stories to be boring. "it made me uncomfortable" GOOD. learn to be uncomfortable from harmless fictional situations and perhaps you'll handle yourself better next time you're uncomfortable irl

mug-of-beans

“The old magic persists thanks to it’s unfathomable power.”

No, the old magic persists because the new magic can’t run the legacy spells I need to do my job, and keeps trying to install spirits I don’t want or need onto my orb.

aqueerkettleofish

Look, if the new magic didn't have a personality construct that kept trying to tell me which spells to use, maybe I wouldn't still be using the old magic.

wizard-council-bureaucrat

Yes it had a deep blood cost, but at least it was a one time sacrifice and not this monthly bloodletting nonsense new age magic has

wizard-archivist-official

The old magic is robust enough to survive a decade of use and it's compatible with every wand, staff, scroll, and charm in our collection.

The new magic stops working after three days and every spell uses proprietary runes.

Our preferences, as an archiving institution, should be pretty clear.

charlesoberonn

You try to get guidance for the new magic and the king's sorcerers maybe will answer you in a few days with an unhelpful suggestion to buy the newest orb.

You need guidance for the old magic and a dozen retired middle-aged wizards will pop up to explain it to you rune by rune if necessary.

dragon-in-a-fez

accidentally said "invasive thoughts" instead of "intrusive thoughts" today and actually I think I'm onto something. this thought does not belong here and it is harming the local ecosystem

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fibro-memes

aphrodite-gock

just overheard somwone say "hey dude i dont see the future I've got two balls and neither is made of crystal" and im absolutely losing it

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