What is evil?

i've used the same lube my entire life without changing (swiss navy silicone) but now that shit is $40 a bottle so it's time to make some adjustments

i think what i want is to start going to the gym a lot

these are not rhetorical questions btw if anyone has any advice please let me know because i just feel so stuck. i feel like i keep retreading the same pattern of repression -> selfishness -> repression ... and i don't know how to get out of it.

is it really just entirely my fault? do i do this to myself? i think i do. but i don't really know how to stop. i feel like i can't move. people tell me to advocate for myself, to be more selfish, but when i do these things people around me are hurt, they get their desires trampled over in favor of mine. so i hold things back and then people around me are upset that i don't express my needs enough. i don't know what the middle ground looks like here. am i just fucked? is it just the people i've chosen to spend my time with? what do i do?

despite my recent becoming of a Real Human Being i still have basically all of the same problems i had 3 years ago and 5 years ago and 10 years ago. so when do those get better

rattlesnake

i can't eat breakfast because they stopped making good youtube videos

woke up to the sound of someone talking outside my window and thought to myself "why does that voice sound so Beautiful and Calming...?" and looked outside and it was a trans woman talking to her dog