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Lint Roller? I Barely Know Her

roma★

tannertan36
Aqua Utopia|海の底で記憶を紡ぐ
Claire Keane
wallacepolsom
NASA
$LAYYYTER
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@theartofmadeline
sheepfilms
YOU ARE THE REASON
Fai_Ryy
Peter Solarz

❣ Chile in a Photography ❣

ellievsbear
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@nevcolleil

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Hollanov canon au Shane gets outed but no one can identify the guy and they decide to hide ilya’s identity until they don’t have to worry about his Russian passport only now there are a bunch of men coming forward claiming to be the guy and so Shane has to state the guy who will remain anonymous is his long time partner and then guys online keep trying to convince him that they wouldn’t hide/to break up with that guy and Ilya is basically foaming at the mouth at this point.
He counts down the days and as soon as he doesn’t have to worry about russia he starts posting online asking Shane Hollander to pretty please consider him for his next boyfriend and Shane visibly flirts back and people are going crazy because does this mean that the other guy is out of the picture or???
Only they post a picture of them together a few days later that reveals Ilya was the guy all along and the internet explodes
“I can believe I asked Shane Hollander if Ilya Rozanov could fight I just barely escaped with my jaw intact omg”
”sorry I said I was better looking than your boyfriend I have taken my humble medication”
”what kind of power does hockey robot Shane Hollander hold to pull rose landry AND Ilya rozanov???”
— RED, WHITE & ROYAL BLUE: THE PRIVATE CORRESPONDENCE (2026) by Casey Mcquiston
Holding space for this promo shot today
I’ve thought about making a Hollanov ‘fell first fell harder’ edit but it is actually impossible bc they both fell equally hard and nearly at the same time so. I guess I just won’t lmao
The heated rivalry starts immediately and never stops. Except, they're actually rivals for who is most doen bad for the other - not who can beat each to the top.

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HR (home run)
super fun comm for @ nocontextjana on twt :>
Shane and Ilya are in the midst of some pretty hot and heavy virginity roleplay, with Ilya playing the role of the pushy boyfriend, and Shane finally relents it's with an, "okay but you have to use a condom."
Instinctively Ilya is about to agree, albeit with some in character complaining, when Shane grabs his hand, his earnest eyes pleading with Ilya - the message clear: no, listen to what I'm actually saying and then Shane averts his gaze and shyly says, "we don't want to risk getting pregnant, after all."
And oh. Oh. Ilya is so on board.
After that it's all, "but it feels so different," and "don't you want it to be good for me?" with Shane making him promise that he'll at least pull out. "Of course," he says, "of course I will," whith both of them knowing full well that he's about to bury himself to the hilt in Shane when that climax hits.
Since I won’t be able to finish this today here’s a lil progress of a hollanova wip :)
Classy and Demure King 👑🙂↕️
very tired of what i think are quite plainly svetlana's canonical feelings for ilya being dismissed out of hand. the only person who ever says they "don't feel that way about each other" is ilya and i think it's actually clear that he's wrong about that. svetlana fishes for information about jane the EXACT same way shane fishes for information about svetlana, and nobody doubts that shane is jealous of her. it's so obvious it's treated both seriously and flippantly by this fandom. it's an Accepted Fact, as it should be, because it's fairly plainly in the text. but svetlana's identical behaviour is obviously not jealousy, for reasons. nevermind that i don't think there is any other reading of her "you do [deserve me], but you don't love me" line but to conclude that she wishes he did love her. no, let's ignore all that. suddenly ilya "we can't be anything" rozanov, ilya "it's simple" rozanov is a reliable narrator about the emotional reality of his relationships.
it's okay for svetlana to be in love with ilya, to have romantic feelings for him, and for him not to feel the same way. it's okay for them to sleep together and be at different places emotionally. it's okay for Ilya to fall in love with Shane when he didn't with Svetlana, because that's not actually any kind of commentary about Svetlana's suitability or worth as a partner to Ilya. from the perspective of narrative, i do think it makes the romance of the story stronger that Ilya does have someone who in many ways would be the ideal partner, for both pragmatic and ephemeral reasons, but he falls in love with Shane. love is ephemeral!! love is rarely, and i would even say never, pragmatic! the best romances in my opinion aren't making an argument for a particular pairing from a logical standpoint; they are trying to convince you of the veracity of the romance. if it is an argument at all, then the goal is persuasion, not justification. so this framing of svetlana vs shane, what makes one a better or more viable love interest, aside from being reductive, is also immaterial. and that is the implication behind saying Svetlana doesn't love Ilya romantically, btw. because if she did, well then we'd have to interrogate why Ilya chose Shane, wouldn't we? we'd have to turn the romance into something quantifiable, that can be weighed in terms of pros and cons, all to justify why shane "deserves" to be chosen? much better to just reduce svetlana to a hollow void of interiority or complexity, lest she pose some kind of threat to the love story.
but we don't have to do that at all, actually. svetlana can love ilya, and be an excellent friend to him, and sleep with him, and maybe even have some complicated feelings about all of that. their dynamic can be messy and complicated, and ilya's dismissal of her feelings can be a lot myopic and a little bit cruel, and it can make the story more compelling, actually. simplifying these characters and their relationships does absolutely nothing to better the story, and for me it certainly does nothing to improve its enjoyability.

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when life imitates art
One of my fave reminders that Shane Hollander is a little shit is the faux innocent look he gives Hayden during the "hold his baby for him" incident
They win the second cup. Hayden never thought it could be this good. A dynasty the announcers are saying.
Shane is grabbing his shoulders. He’s yelling in Shane’s face. He grabs Shane by the cheeks and pulls him in for a theatrical kiss, resounding smack. Everyone laughs, even Jackie.
Later in the locker room, so much champagne everywhere. They’re chanting for Shane and his cheeks are flushed and he stands up in front of all of them eyes wet, says, “Seriously this is for all of us. We all earned this. Together.” And he’s looking at Hayden on that last word and Hayden has to swipe at his eyes.
And Shane drinks. Like he actually drinks. Not just ginger ale but real fucking alcohol. And he’s swaying and laughing and Hayden keeps a hand on him to make sure he’s good. And the way it feels when Shane’s breath hits his neck when he leans in to whisper. “We did it. Jesus Christ” like it’s hitting him all over again. Hayden knows he’s beaming. “Fuck yeah,” he says, jostling Shane’s backwards ball cap and then they’re all yelling, thumping each other on the back all over again, JJ loud enough to make his ear drums vibrate in pain. And Mitty jumping in the middle like he’s in a freaking mosh pit and they topple over, a freakish drunken pile of limbs laughing laughing.
He laughs all the way to Shane’s hotel room. He laughs all the way into it. He laughs when he leans in connecting their lips and he swears the wall was right behind them but there’s nothing, free fall, and they’re on the hotel room floor. Shane hits it first with a groan. “Ow,” he says, eyes closed, still smiling. Hayden army crawls back over, kisses his belly button, his waist line, his rib, rucking Shane’s shirt up, Shane’s fingers in his hair. He noses at a nipple, snuffs hard in Shane’s armpit.
“Fuck Las Vegas,” Shane mutters.
“We fucked ‘em dead,” Hayden agrees, his ear lined up to hear Shane’s beating heart.
And when he wake up, a crick in his neck, still on Shane’s chest on the hotel room floor, he gets up as quietly as he can, tiptoes down the hall to his own room, and sneaks into the bed with his wife.
Yuna and David asking about the timeline of their relationship would have been even funnier if, after discussing how long they've been "lovers":
Yuna: ok, so you've been "seeing" each other for 9 years... And when did you confess your real feelings and decided to be together?
Shane:
Ilya:
Yuna:
David:
Shane:
Ilya: like, today at 4am
HEATED RIVALRY 1.06: THE COTTAGE + HRTwT VERSION

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BEST DAY EVER ☀️🌸❤️🦋
based on this