#1 bug supporter @myopic-creation - Tumblr Blog

Angel on my left shoulder telling me to do good. Devil on my right shoulder telling me to do bad. Rat on my head teaching me how to cook

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markovchaingang

RULES FOR DATING MY DAUGHTER:

my daughter cannot, through action or inaction, harm a human or allow a human to come to harm

a daughter at rest or in constant motion remains at rest or in constant motion unless acted upon by another force

daughters are never created or destroyed, only transformed

always treat every daughter as loaded, even if you know she isn't

you do not talk about my daughter

abalidoth

6. If x and y are my daughters, then there exists a set that has x and y as elements.

7. You can fold my daughter through any two points.

8. I have exactly one daughter parallel to a given line passing through a given point.

inthefallofasparrow

9. If my daughter is hung on the wall in the first act, then in the following one she must be fired. Otherwise don't put her there.

10. When two or more daughters are offered for a phenomenon, the simplest daughter is preferable.

11. Any sufficiently advanced daughter is indistinguishable from magic.

12. Without a clear indicator of intent, it is utterly impossible to parody my daughter without someone mistaking it for the genuine article.

13. My daughter is nine-tenths of the law.

literaryera

I keep hearing John Green say he's retired from working and lemme just say John Green is the least retired retired person I've ever seen.

sizzlingsandwichperfection-blog

I am retired!!! I retired in October of 2017 and have kept my promise not to exchange my labor for money.

Since 2017, I have only done stuff that I thought was interesting or useful regardless of whether it pays, because we have more than enough money, and despite what billionaires might tell you, there is literally no difference between "more than enough" and "much more than enough."

So I no longer work for money. But in retirement one must keep busy, which is why I have taken on an unpaid gig as the social media intern for a coffee and tea business that donates 100% of its profit to charity.

I also sometimes travel to universities and other places to speak in support of Partners in Health and global access to tuberculosis care, and sometimes I write books because writing makes me happy, and every Tuesday I make a video on vlogbrothers, and I make a podcast about the world cup with my friends from high school, and so on, but none of these things constitutes work. These are just Retirement Projects, which are essential to a happy retirement.

jilf

fightinggameheritageposts

fighting game heritage post

beatrice-of-the-stars

This shit reads like a tumblr post

vermilionstarlight

the beach that. makes you dead

tastylemonbread

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3000s

we are in truble

gatesofminrathous

there will never be anything as funny as the mutual disbelief between long form and short form fic writers about each other's style.

short form writers look at people writing 100k+ fics as though this is some sort of talent given as part of a fae bargain, that the commitment required shows some sort of ungodly mental fortitude.

meanwhile long form writers look at people writing 1000 word one shots like god I would cut off my left nipple to be able to say anything concisely. i would love to play with multiple ideas. free me from the shackles of this child I have birthed. i love them but I now must take them to t-ball and doctor's appointments and they're going to destroy everything I own.

ao3commentoftheday

calder

vegans make peace with honey

no shut up do it

calder

vegans will pretend not to hear when natives tell them their agave products are unsustainable because they have whimsical feelings about, and i cannot stress this enough, the freedom of hive insects

blackwashedmax

Honey is literally murder but go off

kasaron

Prove it.

blackwashedmax

They literally puke their guts up to make your honey

kasaron

I have not seen any evidence tonsugges they are harmed or die in the process of production. They do regurgitate the nectar as part of the process to concentrate it into honey (an interesting process) but they do not suffer any injury during this process. If they did, the cost to produce honey, which is done naturally as a measure to survive over winter and through times of lower availability, would outweigh the benefits. If you kill several bees to produce enough honey to make one more bee, It makes no sense. Any animal that did that would die, even with human intervention.

Do you have any sources which suggest otherwise? I’d be interested to hear of this (relatively publicly available) information was false or misunderstood.

blackwashedmax

Bee farmers use whats called a honey maker. It’s a crude devices. It similar to a meat grinder. They force the bees in and grind them up. What comes out is a paste. That paste is later filtered into what we know as honey

hematite2

This is the funniest thing I’ve ever read

leonardo-nierman

@zoologicallyobsessed please show us pics of your bee grinder

gemstone-gynoid

they might be falsely thinking about a honey extractor machine. but all these do is you place the beehive frames inside and a motor rotates it at a speed that removes the honey, which is then tapped through a tap at the bottom.

darkenedyeastextract

…do they think they put bees in that and spin them around until they vomit…?

demonius-darkblade

bee carnival

yeah-yeah-beebiss-1

bad and naughty bees get put into the b e e c e n t r i f u g e to extract their honey

hotvampireadjacent

lol

thornedtoad

flygoing

laptop overheating?? pour water on it to cool it down!

chastittie

i trusted you

flygoing

Do not trust people like me. I will take you to museums, and parks, and monuments, and kiss you in every beautiful place, so that you can never go back to them without tasting me like blood in your mouth. I will destroy you in the most beautiful way possible. And when I leave you will finally understand, why storms are named after people

four-leafed-queer-gal-deactivat

THE ORIGINAL?!?!?!?!?!

counting-horses

These posts contain 39 horses!

♞ @flygoing

laptop overheating?? pour water on it to cool it down!

♞ @chastittie

i trusted you

♞ @flygoing

Do not trust people like me. I will take you to museums, and parks, and monuments, and kiss you in every beautiful place, so that you can never go back to them without tasting me like blood in your mouth. I will destroy you in the most beautiful way possible. And when I leave you will finally understand, why storms are named after people

Posts are selected by humans, processed automatically and queued to post. Click the link for more information about each horse. You can send a link or text to be counted to my ask box.

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kurhanchyk

are you okay i noticed you reblogging "a raven with a damaged wing. it can still fly with ease" again

mshfar2a

I don't like to admit it, but sometimes I actually miss John Green.

sizzlingsandwichperfection-blog

Sometimes I can almost hear him.

arctic-hands

When I was a teenager and still on Neopets I was part of a pretty big Star Trek guild and eventually became part of its council, with the solemn duty of creating weekly polls. Well one day I created the poll "Which would win in a fight? Borg Cube or Death Star?". Naturally, since this was a Star Trek guild, the answer was overwhelmingly "Borg Cube", but someone did have the rationality to point out we were biased.

So I look up a pretty prominent Star Wars guild and message one of their council and ask them to poll the same question and get back to me in a week. They do, and naturally the fuckin geeks said "Death Star".

So then I look up a Stargate guild and messaged the lead council member, saying the same thing, and they get back to me almost immediately saying that the Death Star would immediately one-shot a Borg Cube but they would never be able to do it again to another Cube. And I took that wisdom back to my guild and we were mollified, and for one moment the Nerd World was peaceful.

evilsoup

gilliagandy

Truly thrilled to finally find this post on my dash.

pocketss

Ummm she's literally sensitive :/

anarqueeen

Turning the cuck chair around backwards to show I'm not like your other, boring cuckolds

estrogenesis-eeveeangelion

*youth pastor voice* you know who else got nailed while all his friends watched? that's right,

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puddleorganism

Why does “falling in love” have pretty much exclusively romantic connotations it’s such a good phrase. I’ve fallen in love with every single one of my friends

puddleorganism

This was such a smart post to make because every day I get to see people declaring their love for their friends in the tags. Such a simple but sweet “restoring faith in humanity” kind of thing. We’re all just little creatures who love our buddies <3

puddleorganism

Alright so this post has gotten over 5,000 notes in a month and I think that means the consensus is that everyone loves their friends and you should tell them

mosslingg

fake marriage trope but theyre so fucking stupid

#so oc piled that i see them in Real Ships i Actively Ship

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