Mewa Larus

The difference between me and them is that I recognize myself as an animal defending its territory. Cockroaches spread disease into your food storage. Therefore, they are a home security threat and I shall act as a proper ape should when faced with this kind of threat and stomp on it without remorse.

Many people see differently to me about these things. I know because I am friends with some of them. And yet I am called upon when necessary so the cockroach blood may not be on their hands but instead is on mine.

Here’s a sneak peek tho

Drew this last night bc I miss them

There’s a lot of hate on widowers and I saw a woman say “You cannot compete with a dead woman.” which is perhaps a reasonable statement to say if he’s constantly comparing you to his dead partner but that wasn’t what the post was about. And I realized “Oh my God, these people genuinely feel like they’re constantly in competition with their spouse’s exes and the ex being dead makes them feel insecure that they cannot best her.”

1) I am widowed. my Beloved Wife of Blessed Memory(tm) died in 2019

2) I got together with my current partner about 18 months later

3) when I am committing acts of Foolishness my current partner loves to gesture at the sky to my dead wife, like "do you see this shit, my liege" and regularly says to me things like "[wife's name] was right about this" when my Foolishness inevitably comes back to bite me in the ass

4) this happens. all the time

more importantly:

5) my current partner is on tumblr

6) they love to incessantly send me posts

WHICH MEANS:

7) they just sent me this post with this commentary:

English was invented in the year 927 by Lord English of England. Because 927 was a long time ago, he called it "Old English." Lord English of England was German, so the language was mostly just German with a dash of the language spoken by the original inhabitants of England, the Romans.

It became popular to speak English until 1066, when English Island was taken over by a French guy named Norman. Norman insisted everyone speak French, but they didn't know French so he just dropped some French words into the middle of the language and called it "Middle English."

After Middle English, trade patterns and technology such as the printing press and podcast allowed the infusion of numerous other languages, which all melted into English in their own way. Because they melted with each other, the new language was called Modern English. Several sounds and phonetics changed over the years as well, so this was called the era of the Colossal Vowel Movement.

About this time, England did its usual bullshit and colonized pretty much every place on Earth that it could. English thus spread like a linguistic coronavirus across America, Africa, Australia, and Atlantis, which managed to purge the English influence by sinking to its total destruction and thereby avoiding the horrors of having to speak English.

Today, English is the most spoken language on Earth, not because the most people speak it, but because those who do just never shut the fuck up. Several books have also been written in English, including "Fifty Shades of Grey," "A Weasel in My Meatsafe," and "Pounded In The Butt By My Handsome Sentient Library Card Who Seems Otherworldly But In Reality Is Just A Natural Part Of The Priceless Resources Our Library System Provides."

>thread is from 13 years ago

One of those lists I’ve looked at for Spanish has puerto (port) on it and be honest how often do ports come up in your daily conversations?

And like if that’s what you want that’s fine but the problem is that they try to get everyone else on board with their way of thinking.

They’ve also often bought into the “fluent in three months” lie and think that being at basic survival level in a language makes them good at it.

And like there’s nothing wrong with just wanting to get to basic survival level especially if you’re unexpectedly moving or for tourism purposes but that’s not everyone’s end goal.