Kankri

these hips don't lie, and those hips don't tell the truth. how do you navigate out of this labyrinth

they used to make smackable technology. you used to be able to hit your tv when it didn't work good.

It just shifted to spanking your puppy’s ass, to make them take that thick knot. Like the good little play thing they are.

i don't really think it's like that at all

never lose hope. somewhere, a middle-aged, gender ambiguous person with an advanced degree in an esoteric field and a fiber arts hobby could be crashing out and pinning all their remaining mental health on getting obsessed with your otp. any day now, the most elegantly written 100k fanfic you have ever read is going to hit ao3. it could happen. it has happened.

it’s so crazy having a follower base on tumblr knowing full well it’s not based on selfies or anything like people are here for your crazy twisted mind. i feel like nietzsche

lmaoo

Get your ducks in a row. Now get them in a circle. Get them in a Socratic seminar with that duck in the middle. Get them in a mosh pit. Get them moshing. Get them moshing.

Stop, drop, and roll also works when you are wet. It sort of spreads the water over the floor

im a simple man in my ideal world working full time should pay enough that you can quit and take several months off to do non work things if you wanna. save up and write a novel or go travelling with no consequence. and doing this doesn't fuck up your resume because it would be normal and healthy.

btw with email u dont have to lick the envelope. i know a lot of people have been doing that and its fine and all but you dont acrtually have to do that with email.

I'm a time traveller from the 20th century. I travelled 26 years into the future to deliver this message. At a speed of 1 year per year

Tumblr should never have given us polls. Everyday I have to see years-old polls cross my dash proudly proclaiming past-me's vote which I now disagree with. Let me change my vote!! I have rethought which Tetris piece is the sexiest.