Will Pun at Random

So disappointing when I unmute a video of animals and there's stupid music when I hoped the animals might be going eep.

Everyone at the farmers market wishes to know me carnally

if you aren't best friends with your lover and a little bit in love with all your friends than what's the fucking point

One thing I'm really enjoying about the current series of Taskmaster is the way the contestants seem to have decided that they're competing against Alex instead of each other

it has been like at least eight years and sometimes I still think to myself, when I am tired, “but I am le tired… well then take a nap! AND THEN FIRE ZE MISSILES” even though in retrospect that is like one of the most embarrassingly unfunny videos to ever come out of the internet 

tbh i still start sentences with “hokay, so” at least 3 times a day 

same, aggressively so. I also still use “wtf, mate.”

who doesn’t think this is STILL AS HILARIOUS as it was when we all watched it over and over and over again 15 years ago?

my wife and I still regularly say “hokay so”, “but I am le tired” and “and some big meteor’s like ‘well fuck that’.” Fucking iconic.

I HAVE NEVER SEEN THIS BEFORE AND I’M SO GRATEFUL FOR THIS POST BECAUSE I’VE SEEN IT NOW AND I CAN’T STOP FUCKING LAUGHING

God how has it been that long

he’s broke as hell and he needs his oat milk iced coffee

blinded by the Little Treat high

the movie really undersells the fact that frodo spent half a year planning to make his departure from the shire as inconspicuous as possible and merry and pippin and sam saw him doing that, figured out he was leaving the shire and that it had something to do with bilbo’s ring, and then spent nearly as long preparing to go with him. icons

okay but don't forget fredegar "fatty" bolger...the one hobbit who was like "I see you're going on some sort of quest...have fun with that, I'll stay here and housesit" and then the freaking NAZGÛL come visit while he's housesitting

#TRUE FRIENDSHIP#from everyone including Fredegar#who managed to ESCAPE the Nazgul#by running out the back door#he stayed behind in Frodo's house as a DECOY and it WORKED#time the Nazgul didn't know Frodo had left the Shire was lifesaving#they made it to Rivendell by the skin of their teeth as it was#a couple extra hours *mattered* - from @cygnahime

he wore Frodo's clothes for this which probably made no difference given the data the Nazgul had to work with but it sure does show his commitment to the body doubling bit

idk what they were going for but this sounds like a dril-tier shitpost

This. This is my millennial experience.

thr funniest part of therapy to me is when you first come in and you're exchanging niceties and they say "hello! how are you" and you say "im fine how are you :)" and then 30 seconds later they put on their therapist voice and say "so how are you doing?" and you go well lisa. believe it or not im doing Bad

Hello 911 I just witnessed two entire murders