Fanfiction is cool because you get to learn what other people's parents taught them the hymen is like

I know that I had somewhat unusually comprehensive sex ed but it still surprises me every time I'm reminded that some people genuinely think that losing your virginity is a capri sun kind of situation.

my partner doesn’t use pet names nearly as much as i do, which is very funny because i will crack my gay little knuckles and say some shit like “good morning my sun and moon, my loveliest boy, my baby my sweetheart my darling dearest” and he will reply “hello adrian”

It’s so peaceful being awake when the rest of the world is not.

Why Wayne got socks in the jacuzzi

those are his hooves you bitch

my gf genuinely has me out here giving a shit about BASKETBALL like ive never hated like i hate okc and ive never wanted a win like i have from the mcfreakin san antonio spurs of which we have been watching suck absolute ass for our entire relationship of five years. im on the nba subreddit im on the insta edits. and a fun upside is i know what to talk about to men right now random ass men. the tjs checkout guy hates (loves) to see me comin bc what are we gonna gab about? the western conference finals baybee!!!!!! they love it!!!!!!! i call sga and chet holmgren floppy bitches for five minutes while i bag my nine million frozen items and then i waltz out!!!

The thing about Miss Piggy is that she kind of has a Roger Rabbit comedy superpower where she wins nearly any conceivable fight she's in. But unlike other characters of which that's true, like say, Bugs Bunny, who tend to win because they make the opponent play the game with their rules, Miss Piggy wins because the joke is that she can beat the shit out of literally anybody.

playing with someone’s tits over a fishnet top adds texture and joy for the cultured lesbian

they need to invent the opposite of an nda called an fda where u have to tell everyone everything

subpoena

tumblr

alcohol

war thunder forums

awww the like button turns into a rainbow when you press it! that's so cute...hey staff what's with all the trans women you keep nuking?

i think we should be ridiculing them more for this. you don't get to try and go all "queer website" when your staff likes to go on nuking sprees targeting the trans fem users

would be remiss not to mention that the rainbow notably straight up just removed the trans flag colors from it. like they’re gone. it’s the progress flag minus the trans flag colors.

hey staff what the fuck

hey staff don't you think you're being too on-the-nose

dawn dimmadome? wife of doug dimmadome, owner of the dimmsdale dimmadome?

actually she took the dimmadome in the dimmadivorce

The hatemail game on this website is insane