Illiterate pirates read sundials while underwater? @maybeitsbassoon - Tumblr Blog

“bits to use in everyday conversations”

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deadelated

the gay thoughts are back

mosasadogs

saw you laying on our couch on your stomach kicking your feet cutely before posting this

deadelated

I was literally sitting like this with my guns

tyrannosaurus-rex

Seeing people drive big lifted and totally pristine giant pickup trucks as just a car to get to and from work on fully paved roads is like watching a high energy working breed dog be forced to live in a 1 bedroom apartment and only go out for poop walks.

If you cant provide them the home they need its abuse. That truck should be hauling bricks, it needs to be maxing out its suspension hitting ridges at 65 mph. It should be dirty and dented because they love it. Theres no enrichment in your 1/4 mile drive to the gas station. Youre torturing it, youre killing that truck.

adamsmasher

WE WERE ON JEOPARDY!!!!!!!!!!

rouge-the-bat

thank you for coming to my this #mythis

catgirlmimikyu

There's a reason why white adults have so few genuine friendships across racial lines.

When I met my fiance’s African-American stepfather, things did not start well. Stumbling for some way to start a conversation with a man who

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girlgrimer

How are my sweetie pees

girlgrimer

I Said How The Fuck Are My Fucking Sweetie Pees

whitecherrylavender

Fuck golf. Turn all the golf courses into public sex forests.

teaboot

be the change

monchursouls

🌾🌾🌾

Harvesting my wheat

rat-in-the-grain

Hehehehehe

monchursouls

Can I fucking help you?

sasuke-offical

my senior english teacher told me that any scene with a woman in a cornfield in every piece of literature ever is about her journey to womanhood/pleasuring herself in the field and i just.... believed her

monchursouls

What

rat-in-the-grain

What

mero7t

man you know female characters can have important platonic relationships and care about people without being a mom or sister or wine aunt right

adobe-outdesign

Pokemon but I gave them IRL common names

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kaity--did

Y'all check on your law school friends. The bar is soon they are not okay

kaity--did

Evidence: my husband forgot what day it was last week and I received a text that said "why the fuck did no one tell me it was Friday?"

kaity--did

T minus 6 days until the bar and my husband just walked in a circle around the house for 15 minutes yesterday saying "I do not know the things" and 'stop. Stop dying. Wills are too confusing everyone stop dying"

kaity--did

Update : " everyone just fucking stop owning things. property is stupid and no one understands it. just stop. move to the woods. be free. "

kaity--did

Oh dang y'all blew this up.

kaity--did

For those asking for updates on how the the bar has taken a toll on my husband yesterday a v minor inconvenience happened (he left the keys inside) and he stated "I demand to speak to an attorney"

And then like 20 minutes later he whispered very quietly to the point where I don't think he meant to say it out loud "aw dang I am attorney"

kaity--did

This post always comes round around this time and I want to wish all the baby law students taking the bar in February good luck! You got this!

kaity--did

It's that time of year again where this has started circulating! Good luck baby lawyers!

kaity--did

It is that time of year where I can tell people are getting ready for the February Bar! Good luck baby lawyers! Go out and do good!

narcissistcookbook

an underrecognised tragedy of AI slop isn't just that any piece of contemporary art could be AI, any news reel could be AI, it's that now just any video of something vaguely nice and whimsical happening in the world could be AI

this is about the trampoline bunnies

narcissistcookbook

"lol if you just look closely you can tell when somethi--" silence nerd, the problem is that i don't want to have to approach everything nice wondering if the devil is trying to deceive me

yankeeblue

iwilleatyourenglish

my partner and i have become fixated on this stupid comment left by a conspiracy theorist on instagram and we can't stop saying it and i just know i'm gonna slip up and say it to a normal person

iwilleatyourenglish

oleskyfm

brokenbythesirensound

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charl0ttan

does anyone know how to respond when people text you

charl0ttan

social energy life hacks

charl0ttan

talking with my friends who i love strategy & guide

depsidase

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Illiterate pirates read sundials while underwater?