Let's Go Lesbians!

I bring a real 'actually people who are pregnant do deserve some special consideration because they are effectively at least temporarily disabled if not permanently after some complications' vibe to the party that a lot of people don't seem to like

The Ikea biphobia couch is the funniest thing that's ever happened. We found it gang. Nothing will ever top it in terms of being funny.

The what???

???

I don't know what to tell you man.

the thing is they really do let you hit because you're goofy.

i say shit like "whuh oh!" and it makes girls want to kiss me under moonlight for some reason

say what you will about the 90s but there were so so many women on TV with beautiful curly hair. we used to be a proper society

love island should introduce a "scheming eunuch" islander who is like a smart and completely asexual islander exempt from being kicked off or being made to participate in any challenges and they're just there to provide advice and be a sort of sounding board for the other islanders when they need a disinterested party to talk things through with. but the scheming eunuch has secret goals unbeknownst to anyone e.g. a cash prize for talking a certain couple into breaking up etc.

car is a sentient beast that eats dollars and can tell when you have money in your bank account

Horses are also expensive horses that love to die aren't they

ONCE AGAIN so tired of the 'turning female love interest abusive to give the two male characters an excuse to get together' trope you are annoying af actually why are we still doing this in 2024.

People who try to copy historical writing styles don't say enough weird stuff in them. I'm listening to a 1909 story about a ghost car right now, and the narrator just said he honked the car horn a bunch of times, but the way he phrased it was "I wrought a wild concerto on the hooter".

Reblog to wreak a wild concerto on a hooter

you can have multiple most gorgeous looking women giving performance of their lifetime in a movie or show yet people will still come out obsessing & wanting to fuck a white man with the personality of a wet cardboard

10 or 11 little ducks have been spotted crossing the dash board

I've never seen The Social Network but I do think about the quote when Rooney Mara's character tells Mark Zuckerberg that he will go through life thinking women don't like him because he's a nerd but it will actually be because of his terrible personality. And I have to say whenever someone gets really knee-jerk "SO YOU HATE ME BECAUSE OF [IDENTITY]?" It springs unbidden to mind. Like, yes, bigotry is real, but sometimes people don't like you because you're fucking unpleasant, and any oppressed identities you may lay claim to do not enter into the equation, because the problem is that you are an asshole. And specifically, if you refuse to accept that people can have non-bigoted reasons for disliking you, chances are high you ABSOLUTELY are going to suck to be around for the simple reason that someone who never considers the possibility that someone might not enjoy their company not because of their identity but because of their actions will be entirely insensitive to any feedback re: their actions, which is the precise recipe for an asshole.