The Salt Den

types of stard

this is oddly close to real ‘ard’ is a real suffix in the english language just like ‘ly’ or ‘ify’, it just isnt common enough for us to notice its usage. ‘ard’ means ‘too much’ or ‘too easily’ so ‘mustard’ is something that is ‘too pungent’, just as ‘wizard’ is someone who is too wise, ‘coward’ is someone too easily cowed, and ‘drunkard’ is someone too often drunk

types of ard

further types of ard, since etymonline has a whole section about it (art is an accepted variant)

No no no, I call at least partial bullshit because I was once specifically curious if “cowed” and “coward” were derived from the same root and they aren’t.

the main trick to dancing at a goth club is:

*casts this on you*

#in my one dnd campaign one of the party was a half orc wizard who attempted to solve every problem the party encountered with this cantrip #most of the time it didnt even work which was funny enough #but what was even funnier was that when it did work #after the one minute ran out and the subject became hostile #he was completely flabbergasted #every #single #time #also in a delightful bit of character development on one occasion he cast it on another party member #who after 60 seconds whipped around and slapped him as hard as she could #and he was confused #why was she angry #what did he do #wasnt she very happy for 60 seconds? #why didnt she appreciate that? #everyone else in the party was like #everyone disliked that #someone actually threw that meme up in chat and we had to pause for a minute while we all got the laughs out #anyway after we finished chewing him out over that we all went drinking #and while somewhat drunk he decided to cast friends on HIMSELF #and we all had to pause again to get the laughs out again #none of the other party members knew hed done it so suddenly out of nowhere he started dramatically crying and apologizing to the other pc #and then he never used the spell again #which was for #gameplay reasons as it wasnt actually solving many problems #although it did get us that journal from the two aggressively irish halflings #sorta #anyway it was for gameplay reasons but it fit in extremely well with the character and the whole thing was just delightful

to anyone who missed it:

Me, so I can view the original meme:

I don't disagree that telling stories is amongst the several functions of tabletop RPGs (though it's certainly not the sole function – or even the principal function – of many games), but I think a lot of analyses of story-in-RPGs trip over the GNS model's error of treating the activities of play as identical with the goals of play.

every day i walk into work and my manager says “here is the rule you must enforce” and i go “got it bossman” and i spend a couple days enforcing the rule and then my manager comes up to me and says “why are you enforcing the rule? we changed the rule yesterday and didn’t tell you” and i go “ok bossman new rule it is” and then a customer comes in asking to break the new rule and i say “sorry you can’t it’s the rule” and they say “but you don’t understand the rule doesn’t apply to me” and then my manager comes out and says “they’re right the rule doesn’t apply to them” and i ask why and my manager says “it just doesn’t.” and then the next day we get rid of the rule entirely and no one remembered it existed in the first place.