Impossibly Sporadic Creation

Obvious disclaimer that you shouldn't have wild animals as pets.

But like, cheetahs are the only large cats that keepers will do free contact with. Hell, even most small cats don't get free contact. (Because small cats can be VICIOUS. They'll have a baby pallas cat wearing thicker gloves than when handling an owl. Because small cats can just be vicious.)

Like I think the only other cat at our zoo where I've seen free contact with was servals? Because I know they've used servals in shows to demonstrate their natural jumping ability. But I know servals can sometimes have a mean temper as well. Meanwhile they'll do the cheetah run and afterwards put the mic by the cheetahs and it's just like an engine with them purring. It's fascinating to watch when the message in every other large animal is "no free contact because it's dangerous even when they're born in captivity".

They take him home. They give him the Hebrew name Kal-El and the American name Clark so he will fit in. They know what it is to be different. There is no Hebrew school in Smallville so they teach him at home, and study Torah together. When he shows special abilities, they wonder to each other if he is the Moshiach. Not for the strength of his body, but for the strength of his kindness. He always seems to be helping others, delivering them from harm, as he was delivered to them. They never tell him this, but they teach him about the obligations without measure. He's a natural.

At school, he is side-eyed for being different. When he displays eccentricities, the villagers shrug and say "maybe it's a Jewish thing." The Kents make sure he values his education, and is always home for Shabbas dinner.

His is bar-mitzva'd at the nearest shul, a few towns over. They didn't know his birthday, so they chose one near Parshat Shemot. Now they worry that was too on-the-nose, but he gives a moving d'var about the obligation to speak truth to power.

As he comes into his own and tries to be a hero, he hides his identity from the public, not out of shame, but to keep his adopted parents safe. They've been persecuted enough.

When he moves to the big city for a job at a newspaper, Pa is so proud he cries. Clark uses his journalistic skills to expose corruption, give voice to the neglected and oppressed, and research his own origins. When he learns the truth about Krypton and his birth parents' desperate bid to send him to safety, Ma and Pa are not at all surprised that they were right.

When Clark brings Lois home, he assures his parents she is a nice Jewish girl, but they're just glad she's a mensch. They step on a glass to remember the destruction of Krypton, and stand under a chuppah quilted by Ma.

A white billionaire spews lies about him, trying to spread fear of the stranger in their midst. He comes out in public and says "There's nothing more American than being an immigrant."

When the government turns against immigrants, he stands on the side of the protestors and protects. Tear gass does nothing to him. He makes himself a shield. He writes article after article in the Daily Planet, making sure the public knows what their government is doing, that immigrants know their rights, that the powerful are put on notice. When they start rounding people up, he says "Never again."

They were! Superman was created in 1938 by Jerry Siegel and Joe Shuster, two Jewish boys, sons of immigrants.

What invention are you the most proud of?

"I think the one I'm most proud of was a mechanical spider wind-up toy I made around the age of, oh, somewhere between 11 and 13, I suppose? It was very clever. It used a suction system so that not only would it crawl on the ground, but it would also crawl up windows or any very smooth surface that wasn't too porous. which made it particularly frightening to put it on someone's window while they were asleep, which I absolutely did to Cassandra. And she made such a shrill shriek that I'm surprised it didn't shatter the window it was rolling on. Oh, that was a very, very, good day.

What's it like working with the legendary Taryon Darrington? Do you get along well?

Tary is very much an acquired taste, which I absolutely understand. But to be fair, so I am. I am very charming in short bursts, I do know that. I'm also not particularly accustomed to working with magic. I don't trust it; I like knowing when something goes wrong, how to fix it, and that there are rules that don't... can't be changed by the machinations of gods or other wizards. It seems dangerous, I suppose. Tary, on the other hand, does seem to know exactly what I need and when I need it, and it is nice to explain my plans to someone at the level of which I am used to knowing, and such things about engineering chemistry. You can get a bit lonely not being able to have these discussions with anybody you love in your life, and finally having someone to play against, I suppose, has been, honestly, it's made me the most creative I've been in more than a decade. Without being influenced by some sort of demonic force, I suppose.

How have your glasses stayed on during adventures or even remained intact for that matter?

They haven't, actually. I've lost several pairs during our adventures. They inevitably break. You need spare glasses. I have slightly modified the current set. Instead of resting on top of the ears, there's a coil that wraps around the ears like a spring, and it holds them very well. And I have spare lenses that just pop in or out if I need them, and I've tempered the glass as best I can, and it tends to hold up rather well. So far.

What was the dumbest invention idea that another Vox Machina member suggested? Similarly, what was the smartest invention idea?

It almost feels like cheating to say it was Grog who came up with the most idiotic notion. He invented a hat rack, which was just a stick, that he would put the hats on like a kebab. And he built a prototype with my hats, many of which could not be replaced because the haberdasher who created them had died. [...] The smartest, on the other hand, was Vex's. And I'm working on a prototype for her. It's a saddlebag, I suppose, for the broom. And ways of helping to carry people and carry goods with the broom that doesn't actually destroy its equilibrium, because it is a bit precarious and difficult to pilot. Honestly, I will say that everyone in the group occasionally has brilliant ideas for inventions. They just don't know it.

Sometimes things can be awkward between someone and the sibling of their beloved. Do you know what Vex'ahlia and Cassandra's relationship is like? Fast friends, or is there any tension there?

I imagine by now it is quite obvious that I am not the best reader of people and their relationships, and so I have decided that it is best not to ask.

Hi, Lord de Rolo! I was wondering, are there therapists in Tal’Dorei?

“No age gap??!?!?”

“And no non-con elements”

“NO NON CON?”

“And no coercion or otherwise manipulative behaviors”

“Joe they want a vampire with NOTHING”

two colorful dinos! 🌈

We (yes WE, YOU TOO WHITE PEOPLE) are not pretending these people aren't racist ever again. Using your Latasian-but-voiced-by-a-white-guy abuser blorbo to evoke police brutality against a Femme of Color is maybe, just MAYBE, not a good look, Glitch

This was meant to be a redraw of an image of a couple but, i lost Calix's sketch. I will try to draw him in the future though!

AHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!

wild imps