Here's where I write

If someone broke into your tent trying to murder you you could just scare them off as a bear.

and if a bear broke a into your tent you can go “sorry, I’ve already been eaten”

have been informed that this is from a 1974 sean connery movie called zardoz and all i can say is if i saw this in 1974 my third eye would have snapped the fuck open

Isn’t that a thwomp

I’m so confused why he would think cookie dough would give him salmonella??? What parent told him this. There’s no chicken in there!

Two words: Raw eggs.

?? What kind of world do you live in where Raw eggs carry salmonella or are in anyway unsafe

Don’t ask me, ask them Americans. I’m an Asian just passing the word on

Thank u so fucking much for this wisdom

wait you’re telling my i can get E, Coli just FROM EATING FLOUR straight from the bag???

Why..why are you eating flour straight from the bag?

Umm….

u ever wake up from a dream like “damn i guess i’m not coping with THAT as well as i thought i was”

i feel the need to reblog bc i just scrolled past this kind of post and my life is hell lol so hi

Sorryyyy 😬😐

Ouch

I’m

Fuck you all

I’m not taking these chances, I’m one more bill away from losing it ALL 🤷🏾‍♂️

🙄🙄🙄🙄🙄