swim until you can't see land

girl it’s just a 3 day trip, you do not need to bring your terracotta warriors 🙄

"I am the Sword of God" is like easily top 10 things to declare immediately before doing something really stupid that will probably injure you

calling things "cutes" is so uh. what's a good word for when something is cute but slightly more cute

the word cutes is autological

we're far too culturally obsessed with men who are mean and rough around the edges but turn out to be big softies underneath it all when, in reality, most men who are like this are simply dicks

Parading his big stupid unmoving chrome body around like a sainted reliquary

Dont be very woried about me since i deserve all of this

i havent seen the strong as fuck ice mummy in a while. i hope shes doing ok

spring thaw. weak as fuck water mummy now

i love you semicolon. no one look at my 80 word sentence

Hello bisexual community

Begin killing

its awesome that neither mind reading nor god are real and all of the thoughts inside of your head are completely private and consequenceless forever #myprivacy