aough ourgh

till the room doesn't smell anymore

I think it's time to admit that I may be too cisgender to understand the amazing digital circus

white people say "he doesnt bite" before watching their untrained labradoodle mix do devil may cry combos on your yorkie

I thought I left my keys on the table, but they were actually in my jacket- just another example of The Mandela Effect

We should hang out soon before one of us evolves or disappears

i love craigslist man. i just go on there and do stuff. local semi-famous power metal band looking for a new singer. sure why not. emailed them. they sent me audition materials immediately. craigslist is the way

For all its faults Tumblr has truly ruined all other social media for me because my friends all have Instagram and are all trying to get me on Instagram more but every time I open Instagram there are like fifteen things screaming for my attention and when I get over myself long enough to start scrolling it's like. Where is my chronological dash. Where is the following-only option. Who are these people. Why are there so many videos. Everyone is screaming at me. And then before I know it I'm thirty minutes into scrolling and I haven't seen a single thing that I actually care about. At least on Tumblr when I see stuff I don't care about I know someone I follow has found a new interest.

my new smart tv came with the 24/7 circus accidents channel