GreatPemberly

yuna and david watch wheel of fortune and jeopardy every night and try to answer. when ilya is there he also "tries" but mostly says nonsense

hayden and jackie add shane and ilya as emergency contacts for their kids

ilya enjoys sabrina carpenter because of her humor and boldness

shane has a flight radar app because he thinks it's cool to know what plane is flying overhead at any given moment

shane cycles his clothing and puts what he wore post recently in the back/bottom when he puts his clean clothes away

hayden's favorite ice cream is orange cream

ilya always buys from whatever fundraiser the neighbor kids are doing for school

hayden uses "your" when he means "you're"

shane has blocky handwriting

ilya does not like horses

Like, he’s generally fab with kids anyway but he has a near lifetime of knowledge figuring out what makes Shane tick (and twitch) and this is just a child who isn’t able to control their environment or modulate their responses to things in the way that Shane can.

So when they’re having dinner with the Pikes and Jackie is tiredly recounting the ongoing process of getting Amber tested and how lost they’re feeling, Ilya is like, oh, I have been training my whole life for this. And when 3yr old Amber inevitably starts having a meltdown, Ilya jumps up and says, “Here. I will fix. You stay.”

And they’re like, you know what, sure, have at it.

Within a few minutes of Ilya disappearing with Amber, the crying stops. When they track the two down a half hour later, they’re in the basement on the rug with all the lights off. Amber is wearing a pair of Christmas Pjs (notably a bamboo/cotton mix) despite the fact that it’s February, and she’s laying on Ilya’s chest, ear to his sternum, alternating tapping along as he hums, spinning his ring on his finger, and rubbing his shirt (also a Nice Fabric since obviously Ilya’s whole wardrobe is Shane-approved).

And when Amber sees the family + Shane trooping down the stairs and starts to get riled up again, Ilya is immediately like, “Turn off hall light. It is Dark Floor Time. Only quiet people allowed to join, okie?” And Amber lets out this relieved, shuddery little breath because she has someone who understands and can advocate for her which nearly ends Ilya’s life but also Shane is like, oh shit, yeah, I’m the the best at floor time, I love being quiet and grounded and aimlessly touching my husband, lets fucking go.

So even when the other Pike children get antsy after a few minutes, and their parents take them upstairs, Shane and Ilya stay, letting Amber crawl all over them and get chill before they get her ready for bed.

Afterward, Ilya gives Hayden and Jackie an exhaustive rundown of all the various things they might want to consider for clothing and food and overstimulation and regulation and they’re very grateful but Shane is listening to this going, okay some of this I obviously knew about myself but some of these things I didn’t even notice? Holy shit? He pays such close attention to me?? Hold on, some of these things I haven’t done since middle school. Ilya, did you talk to my mom about my childhood behavior?? And yes, Ilya gives Jackie Yuna’s phone number for additional consult until they get Amber’s official diagnosis and are provided with more resources.

(And maybe at first Shane wants to be annoyed about the fact that Ilya has been, what, researching and compiling some sort of manual on how to handle him? Right up until Ilya reminds Shane that Shane has an Ilya Spreadsheet that now contains over a dozen tabs of Ilya’s likes and dislikes, injuries and recovery protocols, training and diet and supplements, depression treatment with behavioral red-flags and mitigation techniques, and even sexual preferences. And Shane is like, oh yeah, okay, that’s fair)

But anyway. As the Pike kids grow up, Ilya tries not to be obvious about it, but it’s just Known that Amber is Uncle Ilya’s favorite. And everyone is mostly okay with that.

His doting is so quietly impactful for Shane, though, because here is a child who reminds Shane of his own younger self: a little odd, who struggles to articulate what she feels and needs, who gets overstimulated easily and has obsessive interests, but even so, Amber is a favorite and so loved and accommodated by his husband. That’s gotta be healing.

Also, as much as they try to get Amber to hyperfixate on hockey, I think it’d be hilarious if she became a horse girl and Ilya literally buys her a pony.

(Hayden: Oh my god, Ilya. Do you know how expensive horses are?? Ilya: Yes, yes, maybe for 15th best player on the Metros with one hundred other children, horse is big cost, but not for best player in the league married to second best player in the league with Yuna Hollander in charge of sponsorship deals. I set up fund for board and train. Is couch money.)

Ilya is in a depression low and the fact that his hockey persona is still “biggest asshole” no matter what he does has been getting to him even if he won’t admit it. So Shane posts a photo compilation titled “Every Reason Ilya Rozanov Is NHLs Biggest Asshole”

-“Bullies his teammates” with a picture of Ilya doing a celebratory fist pump next to Haas with his face in his hands, in front of a tv showing Ilya getting first in Mario Kart

-“Bullies his competitors” with a picture of Ilya laughing and Scott Hunter looking like he wants to set him on fire with his mind as he holds a birthday card labeled ‘Woah! You made it to 100!’

-“Bullies Hayden Pike” with a picture of Ilya and Jackie in the lake doing the Dirty Dancing lift while Hayden stands by with his hands on his hips and glaring

-“Stealing” with a group of pictures of Ilya wearing a Hollander 24 hoodie, wearing the Canadian Olympic fleece, and wearing one of Shane’s old jerseys

-“Dramatic” with a picture of Ilya in a feather boa at a karaoke night at a gay bar, eyes closed as he is clearly belting out some song

-“Takes jobs away from janitors” with a picture of Ilya in an arena post-game and picking up litter people dropped in the hallway

-“Bad role model to youth” with a picture of Ilya and a kid at one of the camps sticking their tongues out at each other

-“Child abuse” with a picture of Ilya playing paintball with a group of young boys

-“Animal abuse” with a picture of Ilya bathing an unhappy Anya in a kiddie pool in the backyard

-“Disturbing local wildlife” with a blurry picture of Ilya running away from a Canada goose

-“Encourages cavities” with a picture of Ilya letting trick or treaters take handfuls of candy from a bowl

-“Unfair sales tactics” with a picture of Ilya taking pictures with people at a Girl Scout cookie sale table, the table surrounded by a crowd of people waiting and holding cookie boxes

-“Trespassing” with a picture of Ilya shoveling a neighbors driveway

-“Fashion crimes” with a picture of Ilya in a pink baseball hat, a neon orange tank top, jorts, and neon green crocs

-“Not helpful at puzzles” with a picture of Ilya and David in front of a one thousand piece puzzle, both with their faces in their hands, pieces everywhere

“So, Mr. Hollander,” He stressed Shane’s last name, “What are you getting?” “Shane.”  The correction zipped out of his mouth in reflex, his sight trained on the desserts section of the menu, like the carrot cake was an actual option he was considering for dinner. A few beats passed and Ilya still hadn’t responded, so Shane sighed, reiterating, “You can just call me Shane… The Mr. Hollander thing feels weird when we’re…” he still didn’t look up, “y’know…” and he waved a hand absentmindedly around, like he was trying to motion to the whole entire situation they were in. Out eating dinner. Spending time outside of school.  He didn't finish the sentence.

Shane Hollander built his life after college around safe choices. Safe job, safe routines, and a safe distance from the hockey world he abandoned years ago.

That is, until Ilya Rozanov walked into his second grade classroom.

Read chapter 6 here

which then means he starts collecting lego sets as a hobby. shane reads his book, ilya does his latest lego, and they have very enjoyable parallel play time unwinding in the evening.

but shane also?? doesn't understand?? why everyone who comes to their house?? always thinks they're HIS lego sets??? man is undiagnosed and also has no real awareness of associations that people tend to have with other people who are also Shane Shaped, so he TRULY has no idea why every single person who comes to their house sees the legos and immediately turns to HIM to go, "oh? you're into legos? that's cool."

Shane nearly jumped out of his skin when he saw 'Lily' appear on his phone screen.

It probably wouldn't have been nearly as surprising if he hadn't been sitting staring at his screen, but that was another story.

"Hel–hey," he answered, swallowing all the eagerness he could, fighting to sound casual as he answered the call.

"Hello," Ilya replied, sounding anxious. "I am–I am at Boston airport. Just got through security. Um. Flight is on time."

He could have texted Shane that information, but neither of them pointed that out.

"Ah–good," Shane nodded jerkily, relief and terror flooding him in equal measure. Fuck. Ilya was actually doing this. Flying here. Coming to Shane's cottage. 

"Man at security tried to–what is it called? Frisk me? But I told them I already have other plans for someone to touch my dick," Ilya continued, a little smile in his tone, now.

Despite his nerves, Shane snorted. "Shut up," he muttered, shaking his head fondly.

Silence.

"You are...ah...still picking me up?"

Shane gulped, looking around. "Yeah. Um...if you still want me to, that is. If it's too...weird, or whatever, I can get a car service, or see if there's taxis, or, um maybe there's public transpor–"

"Hollander."

"Yeah?"

"I want you to."

He breathed a sigh of relief. "Okay."

Silence.

"You will be there on time?"

He bristled. "Yeah, Rozanov, I'll be there on time!"

Ilya laughed. "I am just saying! You probably have to leave soon, yes? You don't want to be late."

Shane frowned, rolling his eyes. "Yeah, yeah. You're right, I should...yeah."

"Okay."

Silence.

"I will see you soon, Shane."

Fuck. It wasn't fair how much that made him smile. "See you, Ilya," he murmured.

When the line went dead, he sighed, looking out his car window to the deserted airport parking lot, where he'd already been waiting for half an hour.

Shane, sitting in the stands of the rink they were using for the first Game Changers camp, was completely caught up in paperwork. He barely noticed his mother’s hand fluttering at his shoulder, so it took her a few tries to gain his attention. But once he looked up, frowning a little, he saw her silently gesture to the ice, where Ilya stood with one solitary girl, about ten years of age.

Shane put down his pen and tilted his head to the side, listening in.

“...cannot say those things,” Ilya was saying patiently crouched down to the girl’s level. “Will not help you succeed. You have to believe in yourself.”

“But I’m just not good enough! I try and try and I just keep messing up! I’m so stupid!” the girl wailed, looking close to tears.

Immediately, Ilya pouted. “No, no! You cannot say this, I will not allow it. You are my friend and I do not let people say these things about my friends.”

Even through obvious tears, the girl smiled. “We’re friends?”

“Da, Милая девочка, of course. And I am not friends with stupid people.” He paused for a moment. “Well, except for maybe Hayden Pike. But normally is a rule, okay? So you are not stupid, and I will not let you say that. So come on, we will try again, and you will remember that you are my friend, so of course you are smart and talented and the best, okay?”

“Okay,” she sniffed, standing up straighter and moving towards a nearby puck. After a deep breath, she began to skate, maneuvering the puck in a complicated fashion before shooting it with obvious strength toward the upper-right corner of the goal. To her delight, it landed inside. 

She let out a yell of happiness that was quickly overshadowed by Ilya’s bellow of pride, and the tall man quickly skated over to her and picked her up, swinging her in a circle and rambling how how proud he was.

Shane, from the sidelines, felt tears in his eyes, utter adoration for his boyfriend flooding his body. “Please tell me you got that on film,” he murmured to his mom, wanting to relive that moment again and again whenever he was sad.

“Mhm. I’ll send it to you,” Yuna said with a smile, patting his shoulder.

Shane is far too aware of his face. As he sits next to Ilya on the couch in Harris’s office, he’s a little terrified that Ilya will figure out what they’re doing, but the other man seems completely at ease, utterly unaware that he’s sharing a room with two liars.

“Okay, so, this’ll be super quick, like I said,” Harris details casually, fabricating information for a fake interview he and Shane had come up with. “Just something about you two discussing some of your favorites, so our fans can get to know you as people. Shane, why don’t you take the intro. Say who you guys are, and what you’re doing.”

He nods, trying to concentrate. Then, when Harris hits record on his phone and nods, he speaks. “Hi, I’m Shane Hollander, and this is my current husband Ilya Rozanov. We’re here to talk about–”

Immediately, he feels Ilya stiffen next to him and turn his way. Still, he valiantly goes on, fighting to keep the smirk off his face.

“-about some of our favorite things. Maybe–”

“Current husband?” Ilya interrupts, shifting his entire body so he is facing Shane, ignoring Harris completely as he gives Shane a look of utter disbelief. “Hollander. Solnyshko. Maybe I need English lesson, hm? You need to tell me what ‘current’ means?”

He can’t help it. He smiles, just a little, amused by the other man’s annoyance. “Uh, you know. Like ‘right now.’ I mean, you never know. Things can change in the future, and–”

“Oh, no,” Ilya said confidently, shaking his head like this is the most asinine statement he’s ever heard. “No, not at all. We have married, Hollander. We are like beavers.”

And now Shane blinks, taken off-guard, because yes, he’s heard that word used in a few ways, but not in this context. “Um…what?”

“Beavers, Shane,” Ilya says impatiently, like he should know this. He gestures between them. “Mate for life.”

He feels himself blush, eyes flickering over to Harris, who is doubled over in silent laughter. “Ilya, don’t say ‘mate,’ that’s–”

But Ilya’s jaw is set, and he wraps his arms around Shane possessively, kissing his cheek. “No, is true. Harris, tell the whole world. Shane and I have mated for life. End interview.”

Shane at 3 am:

hayden immediately groans and rolls his eyes openly. "god she is so annoying, all she writes about is the guy that broke up with her that week."

and ilya doesn't know much about her, sure he's heard the singles. he's danced to blank space in the club and has drunkly sang love story with cliff at karaoke one time. but he loves pissing off hayden so immediately says, "oh, wow pike. i did not know you were so... what is woman hater word?" "misogynistic" shane provides next to him. "yes, thank you moya lyubov; misogynistic. boys write about break ups too, yes?"

hayden is pissed at the insinuation [and at shane for helping him] and to further press his buttons, ilya goes to the living room so he can dance with the girls.

this becomes a thing, swiftie dance parties with uncle ilya, and as he keeps listening he starts kinda digging the music. he stumbles upon marjorie one day and cries so hard he almost throws up, and suddenly he's buying pit tickets to the eras tour for him, shane, and the girls off of stub hub.

“Does this mean I can volunteer again?” His face mockingly resembled one of a pleading child, asking their parents for a candy bar. “Now that I am single man?” Shane couldn’t help it. A breath of laughter puffed out of his mouth, and he dropped his head in exasperation. Ilya’s chuckle rumbled in front of him, and Shane reached up to smooth out one of his eyebrows, still fighting down his laughter. He looked back up at him, giving a tiny roll of his eyes, “Yes, you can volunteer.” Ilya’s face was full of satisfaction.

Shane Hollander built his life after college around safe choices. Safe job, safe routines, and a safe distance from the hockey world he abandoned years ago.

That is, until Ilya Rozanov walked into his second grade classroom.

Read chapter 4 here

It was stupid, to feel nervous. 

At least, that’s what Shane told himself, as he paced around his hotel room in Vermont, his heart fluttering like a hummingbird’s wings. 

Except…he was. Nervous, that is. Because he and Ilya hadn’t seen each other since before preseason, and now…now they were meeting up.

They were no stranger to clandestine meetings in hotel rooms, to be sure. But this time was different. They’d intentionally carved out this time, meeting in a city halfway between them both, booking a room specifically to see each other. It made the whole thing feel much more real.

And it was, wasn’t it? 

They were boyfriends now. They texted, talked on the phone, kept each other updated on mundane things like what they’d eaten or when they’d last jerked off. 

And it’d been good. Full of hilarious, bickering chirps over text and phone sex that’d left him seeing stars. Confessions on facetime and nights falling asleep with a smile on his face. It was so fucking good that Shane was terrified. What if, when they saw each other again, it somehow all went to shit?

So he paced back and forth, waiting for Ilya to arrive, trying to convince himself that he would be okay if something happened. That he would be able to go on, if his heart was ripped from his chest. 

(He lied to himself a lot.)

A soft knock on the door made his stomach lurch, and for a moment, he wildly considered throwing up.

Instead, though, he shakily grabbed the door handle and pulled it open.

And…

Oh.

How was Ilya even more handsome than he remembered? Facetime couldn’t possibly do the man justice, a piece of technology as inept as a cell phone camera unable to pick up the way his easy smile and beautiful presence took the air from the room in the best way.

As soon as Shane saw him, he wanted to fall to his knees, but something held him back. “Hi,” he said softly instead, because what else could he say? He’d forgotten how to speak, his brain too focused on the way Ilya’s eyes were alight with joy; sparkling with what looked like happy tears.

“Hi.”

His voice was soft, too. Gentle, like Ilya was just as terrified to break the spell they’d cast. Reverent. Warm, worshipful.

“You’re–you’re here.” He didn’t need to point it out. But he did because all of a sudden, the ache he’d felt for weeks, the way he’d missed Ilya more than breathing, had welled up inside him, constricting Shane’s ability to breathe.

They still hadn’t touched, hadn’t reached for each other, but the tension in the air was so thick it could have been snapped in Shane’s palm. 

Ilya smirked a little. “You are, too. And you are not wearing suit. I am disappointed, I think.”

It took him a second to understand. He’d told Ilya the story of how he’d put on a suit before they’d first hooked up as teenagers one night on a phone call, needing to hear his boyfriend’s laugh. Of course, he’d regretted it ever since. 

Beaming, Shane shook his head and rolled his eyes. “Asshole.”

And then…they made eye contact.

It was like magic. Both men snapped together like magnets, connecting their lips, grabbing for jaws and hair and waists, swallowing each others’ moans, stumbling into the hotel room with such desperation Shane’s whole body shook.

It took him about ten minutes to realize that they’d been sitting in silence. That even though Shane had been enjoying the quiet, his body buzzing with a ridiculously happy feeling at the way his toes tapped firmly on Ilyas as they sat, feet-to-feet, on opposite ends of the couch, Ilya was probably ridiculously bored just sitting here scrolling on his phone.

Shane swallowed, struggling to think of what to say. “Um. It rained today.”

Light eyes twitched up from Ilya’s phone screen. “Yes. I was there,” Ilya nodded, lips curling upward as he rolled his eyes almost fondly.

He swallowed, flushing. Fuck. He’d never been good at this. But shit, Ilya was looking back at his phone, and oh god, he must be so fucking bored. Shane had to decide what to talk about, fast.

“Uh. We can have hot dogs. For dinner later. I asked the lady at the store which kind was best, since…you know…I don’t usually eat them.” He said this fact like a peace offering, trying to prove that even though he sucked at talking, he did desperately want Ilya to have fun while he was here.

Again, Ilya looked up at him with amusement in his eyes. “Okay,” he murmured. But…he didn’t seem annoyed or upset to be here. 

It didn’t make sense.

And–fuck. Ilya looked back at his phone again.

“D’you want to–” Shane began, shifting uncomfortably, no clue where he was going with his offer but so damn nervous about Ilya’s attention slipping away.

“Shane.” Ilya put his phone down on his chest and looked at him, this time like he was looking through him, into the most vulnerable recesses of his soul. “Is okay. You do not have to…entertain me. I am here to be with you, yes? Is okay to just be quiet for a little. I am happy to just be here and relax, like you said. You do not have to…pretend for me.”

Relief, sweet and all-consuming, flooded Shane. Unable to stop the small smile that bullied its way onto his face, he nodded, looking to where their feet touched. “Okay,” he murmured, reaching back to his own phone.

“Hey guys, I have an idea!” Shane calls out. They weren’t too far into the drive, but he was already starting to get a little overwhelmed.

Shane loves his family so much it hurts. There isn't a single thing in this world he wouldn’t do for them. And individually, they were usually fine! For all his chirping, Ilya could always tell when his husband was getting overstimulated, knowing exactly when to pull back. And while Sofiya wasn’t necessarily the quietest child, she knew how to use her inside voice just fine, and Shane never wanted to be the one to dull her sparkle.

But sometimes, when you put the two of them together in a confined space with enough sugar to rile them up, things could get rough. They were still over an hour away from the cottage, and Shane was already starting to get a little tired of Disney karaoke. Hence the idea.

“Daddy idea!” Sofiya echoes helpfully, calling on Ilya to turn down the music. (If Shane ever caught Elsa, so help him god-)

“How about we play the quiet game?”

Ilya hums a little doubtfully, but in the end, his competitive spirit wins over. “And how is this game played?”

“Whoever can stay quiet the longest wins, doesn’t that sound fun, Sonya?”

It takes a little more convincing in the end, but they finally figure it out, and for the first time since they started the trip, the car is totally silent. Shane heaves a sigh of relief, glancing over to the passenger seat to see Ilya smirking back at him. Obviously, his husband knows what he’s up to, but Shane loves him even more for playing along.

Everything is going smoothly, that is until Shane chances a look in the rearview mirror. He sees Sofiya all buckled up in her carseat, face scrunched up and lips tightly pressed together as if even the slightest opening will let sound escape. Shane can’t help but burst out laughing at the total concentration etched on her face, a need to win that she could have only inherited from them.

“Daddy loses!” Sofiya calls out happily, and the statement sends Ilya into a fit of laughter as well.

“You lose too, Sonya,” Ilya calls back to her, “Papa wins this round.”

“No fair!” she yells out, ever Shane Hollander and Ilya Rozanov's daughter, “Play again!”

Ilya is not usually someone that backs down from a well-placed chirp. Words at the ready live behind his teeth; it’s all part of a perfectly constructed barrier he’s built for himself over the years. But he also knows that it’s pointless to allow others to get under his skin, especially since there are better ways of spending his time; like getting underneath theirs. His chirps never wander into something personal; why do that when he’s got plenty of things to comment on that has everything to do with the sport they share? There’s a reason that he’s one of the best players in the league, and Ilya knows it. He doesn’t shy away from letting others know it too. Just because he’s on Ottawa’s team now doesn’t change that.