moderately priced domestic non-vintage champagne

Not book smart or street smart but a secret third thing.

supid

supid.

as a child i assumed that martha’s vineyard was a fancy private vineyard owned by martha stewart and the reason rich people vacationed there was because they were friends with martha

nip over to troy, bit of rough and tumble, big horse, bish bash bosh, back home to ithaca. simple as

i hate dogs with blue eyes. why is fucking jeff the killer at my back door

before this starts getting notes i have to add that this is not my dog. i dont know how he got in my backyard

someone made a terrible youtube video searching for the source of this dog picture like it's lost media and he on-screen scrolls by a live tumblr link to this post before claiming i deleted my account, pulling up a wayback machine archived page, and then lying about contacting my ex boyfriend for more information

the problem with musicians is how they're always touring their latest album instead of like their critically hated second album from 2009 which is the one i'm obsessed with

has anyone noticed that sometimes you take incorrect or undesirable actions instead of the correct and desirable ones? what's up with that

noncon friendship

Coworkers

Your friend’s boyfriend

does anyone remember that one Tumblr account that was dedicated exclusively to hating on Jon Arbuckle

i remember

Just saw my doctor type "FUCKED FOR LIFE" on my chart then he turned the screen away and stopped making eye contact with me