Not today Justin

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One Nice Bug Per Day

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shark vs the universe
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d e v o n

Love Begins
$LAYYYTER
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Kiana Khansmith
i don't do bad sauce passes
Xuebing Du
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@gingerbreadperson

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You make soup in a big bowl. You serve it in a smaller bowl. And then you convey it, using a spoon, to your mouth. But what is the spoon? Simply a smaller bowl still
In my opinion the human body gets dehydrated too easily.
Also when it wants water itās a secret for some fucking reason.
is there an... uncle inflammatory?
If you're ever worried about whether your writing is too self indulgent, I just want you to remember that Sharknado had 5 sequels. I'm only partway through watching Sharknado 6: It's About Time, but already they've traveled through time and ridden a pteronadon into a Sharknado so they could use the magic teleportation portal inside of it to travel forward in time to King Arthur's time, where they are currently battling a Sharknado full of fire-breathing dragon sharks with Excalibur, which is a chainsaw sword that calls lightning. You're fine. In fact, be a little more self indulgent if anything.
Is this a hallucination? Are you ok?
Its absolutely real.
Theres this thing that happens with a few too many franchises, where the constant need to one-up and raise stakes makes each entry slightly more unhinged than the last. Until you reach a point where what started as a fairly simple/grounded concept has become completely ridiculous(see Dragonball, Fast and Furious).
Sharknado is what happens when you have that tendency of escalation, but your starting premise is 'a tornado full of sharks'
You can put down the shovel, bud. It's The Asylum. Every movie they make is like this. And was like this before Sharknado and will be like this long after, because that's the kind of movie the company makes. They were making terrible horror movies before Sharknado, with just as weird and ridiculous premises. Sharknado was never grounded (and if you think so, you must not have watched it), nor was it meant to be. The POINT of their movies is to be ridiculous. They literally named the company The Asylum because they knew they were gonna make "crazy" stuff. It's not the same as a serious first movie that jumps the shark in a sequel or something. The shark was jumped way before they threw it into a tornado.
Ah yeas the Asylum also known from other classics like āSnakes on a Trainā and āThe da Vinci Treasureā
Their whole schtick is: big blockbuster movie gets announced > make a terrible low budget version of it within 4/6 months > preferably release it just before the release date of the big budget A-movie. I think they did this with War of the Worlds and Aladdin but could be a different studio too(??)
THE WORST THING IS that these spoofy movies are now getting big budget versions made. Like there is ābetterā version of Sharknado right now called thrash on Netflix which is ļæ¼ just plain distopian

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seeing discourse about āforeign filmsā is really funny when youāre not american
i saw a foreign film the other day. have you heard of Jurassic Park
fact: Jack Rackhamās crew accidentally collects lesbians
hypothesis: when Flint and Thomas break everyone out of the plantation and start their own crew, it winds up being, percentage-wise, pretty gay
extrapolation: āserving under Rackhamā and āsailing with Flintā becomes pirate slang for being gay
like
āI met a gorgeous girl last night but then I found out she, you know, serves on Rackhamās crewā ātough, better luck next time youāre on shore leave, mateā
or āwe all went up to visit Mapletonās girls, except for Harrison, ācos he sails with Flintā
or āyou think sheās on Rackhamās crew, or is it worth asking if i can see her again tomorrow night?ā āher? no, I heard she, uh, you know, works for Eleanor Guthrie, I think itās worth a shotā
anne hears people talking about women whoĀ āsail with Rackhamā in whispers, so she storms up to jack likeĀ āwhat the fuck are you planning with all these people?? without telling me??ā and jack is just like ā???? iāve never heard of those ladies in my lifeāĀ while max is just giggling in the background because She Knows that jackās legacy is being the Letās Go Lesbians guy
i've been phasing the phrase 'google it' out of my vocabulary and going back to 'look it up'. fuck you youve lost your generic trademark privileges
All this discourse over who does "painting with light"
Hiroshi Nagai's paintings need sunglasses to look at.
They look like how it feels to walk across a parking lot on a 98° summer day without a speck of shade in sight.
They look like heaven but also like you'd burn your bare feet on the ground.
Even when you can see shade you know it's not enough and the minute you step out you'll be burnt to a crisp like a vampire.
And it's BEAUTIFUL
I'll throw in the wonderful Eizin Suzuki into this ring too, a man whose work just breathes light without actually using dynamic lighting in the usual way. It's no surprise both Nagai and Suzuki are both considered prolific in art pertaining to the city pop genre because they're able to paint these kinds of scenes with a delicate touch.
This feels like I could trip on that radio and fall right into that water, feeling the crystal waves as I drop in.
And this, a nice stroll down a resort strip, where my sunscreened skin could literally feel cooked if I leaned too close to the tiling.
And then a nice stretch of summer street, wherein you could see your face in the flushed red of that car provided it didn't blind you from its sunny reflections.
I don't think I even need to say anything more, Suzuki's a massive influence in how he even places colours so warmly in such unorthodox manner. It's a naturally sunkissed talent~ š

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no peeking at the answer below, did you get what the shirt said?
yes
no
If you havenāt heard, today PolyCystic Ovarian Syndrome has been renamed to Polyendocrine Metabolic Ovarian Syndrome. This change reflects that this is not a reproductive āproblemā but a whole body disease.
For reference, from the WHO website:
(Text: PCOS affects an estimated 10-13% of reproductive-aged women. It is estimated that up to 70% of women with PCOS worldwide do not know they have this condition.)
The Lancet link about shift to PMOS. Spread this to everyone who works in health care now. People with uteruses and ovaries are in agony - yes, the whole body suffers a crisis every fkn month - and health care should help
thereās absolutely something to be said about ābooktokā books being largely wattpad quality written erotica iām certainly not reading them however having seen a guy on tiktok make a video like āall the women in your life are READING PORNā about a book he picked up and read in his FEMALE FRIENDāS HOUSE in a tone of scandalised horror and disgust i actually donāt think men should be making those criticisms. he said he picked it up expecting a romance and was horrified it was GOONER SHIT he said specifically like āwho are you getting your pussy wet FOR??ā in a tone of revulsion. idk man im not sure shes the weird one. i kind of wish you were dead
"a lot of books that are successful on booktok are not very good" and "people can read what they want and we need to stop being so fucking weird about women enjoying erotica" are both correct statements
john silver. no one is doing it like him. this is famously because doing it like him is a truly terrible idea. good fucking christ
[guy confused about lesbian relationship voice]: okay ... so which one only tells lies?

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i get that americans love their cultural imperialism, but it really does piss me off that june is āinternationalā pride month just because something happened in the united states.
in aotearoa, june isnāt our pride, itās theirs. marsha p johnson and sylvia rivera are their historical figures, not ours. the phrase that āyou owe your rights to Black trans womenā is true there, but here we owe our rights to (mostly) MÄori historical figures. i have the freedoms i do because of the legacy of an entirely different set of people operating in an entirely different context at entirely different times.
But because of american cultural imperialism, most queer people in Aotearoa donāt even know our own queer history. Carmen Rupe, Ngahuia Te Awekotuku, the Dorian Society, Gillian Laundon, Georgina Beyer, and the Wolfenden Association are some of our queer history. We should know their names! we should know what they did for us! but because of the power of the american imperial machine, we donāt.
our national pride month should be july, the month that the Homosexual Law Reform Act passed in 1989. our two largest cities hold their pride festivals in february and march, respectively. american queer history has very little (or nothing, depending on who you ask) to do with our queer history. anecdotally, from my own queries, queer youth in aotearoa know more about american queer history than our own.
anyway, happy pride, americans. iām truly sorry that most of you donāt see the negative impact your nationās culture has on the rest of the world. and to the rest of the world reading this, try searching for your own country and cultureās queer history, donāt accept the american narratives as your own. we deserve our own histories divorced from the cultural hegemony of the USA.
this post is closing in on 10k and itās really quite enlightening reading through the notes.
the most frequent reactions are from people from Not America agreeing that the cultural force of american pride has detracted in some tangible way from their knowledge or recognition of their own history. thereās so many links and references in the notes now, for so many different places. i had a scroll through some of them, that i could find versions of in english. the world has such a rich queer history, and i am inspired by all of the people saying theyāre going to go and research more of their own histories. there have been resources shared from all six permanently inhabited continents (none from antartica, yetā¦), including a lot (relative to the usual zero) from the regions most frequently glossed over in our global queer histories; africa, the middle east, southeast asia, the pacific, and south america. every single person whoās shared a queer historical figureās name, or a book or other source, or a historical event from their country or culture is doing an important thing by helping to dismantle the US pride hegemony.
the next most frequent reactions are from americans pissing on the poor, and claiming that either itās not their fault individually because [nebulous reason missing the point] and/or that iām racist (someone even said fascist lmao?) because the two people i mentioned were Black and latin american⦠itās not the fault of those two women nor myself that americans have chosen their faces and names to put at the front of their imperialist pride. cultural imperialism doesnāt have to LOOK racist! you can be unintentionally culturally imperialist and look woke! a lot of the people who do this are queer and liberal or even leftist. the problem is forcing american queer history on the rest of us. shoutout to the Black and latine people in the notes whoāve rightfully pointed out that thatās a bullshit rebuttal. Iāve also noted the autocorrect typo on Marshaās name, and fixed it, thanks for the heads up.
sort of the point of cultural imperialism is that the people doing it donāt notice it on an individual level. of course you donāt feel like youāre responsible! of course you struggle to see it when the rest of us point it out! thatās by design! if the rest of the world is saying something is a real experience that theyāve had, and you say āwell i donāt see it / iām not responsible for it,ā that is blatant denial of a very real issue.
finally, for the love of god, stop using they/them for me, a trans woman who exclusively uses she/her. my pronouns are front and centre on my blog! funny how the people calling me racist and transmisogynistic for Using Examples are also frequently degendering me in the process, huh?
anyway, this vent was never intended to go viral, i posted it on a quiet afternoon after a conversation with a friend about our queer history here. iām glad it has, though, because glossing over the americans swinging and missing, the breadth of history and knowledge being shared in the notes is a wonderful thing.
i love (read: hate) that this post is an āitās june 2ndā alarm in my notifications now. because apparently it immediately starts off again when america hits june 1st. ugh.
While watching a DVD from the library my TV popped up a message saying to press a button if I wanted to watch this from additional providers.
It's never done that before so I looked it up and turns out Roku TVs have added all sorts of creepy things in the privacy section since I last checked.
One of which being they take screenshots from what you're watching and send them to third parties to identify it.
Fucking hell! Remember when every fucking device in your life wasn't a spy implanted in your home and working against your interests to try and sell your data? Remember how nice that was??
Remember when the TV was just a tool that would play the things you plugged into it?
Why must the future suck SO much?
TVs collect a huge amount of data. Here's how to use privacy settings to limit the surveillance on TVs from LG, Samsung, TCL, and every othe
A good rundown on what each brand of TV is up to and which settings you should turn off.