Gender Equality

The article goes on to say no matter what the way a women looks will be held against her. I completely agree , like the article says when you are attractive all men want is to have sex. Since women are supposed to be for the pleasure and enjoyment of men , if a women is unattractive she’s has no purpose to them. Quite disturbing but not shocking in the least bit. Men want to be important so bad , anything a women does it must be because of him. It’s sickening , and untrue.

“ We make it so “ , things in society happen or are accepted because we make it so according to Han. Whiteness continues because we allow it to and we practice it everyday. Saying it like this makes change seem easy but it’s far from it.

Appearance seems to be everything in today’s society , the same job and sexual acts look better when they’re hidden. The slums as they called it is seen as less than the middle class neighborhoods but yet many people were fascinated with it and what went on there. Disapproval and fascination is a weird combination , publicly disapproving but privately intrigued and interested. Why are some deemed as fairies while others are looked at as working class men enjoying themselves , why was the word fairy okay to be used ? People fear things they don’t understand , being gay isn’t a disease it’s natural just like a mans natural attraction to a women.

“ Be all you can be “ , exploring everything that you are and everything you want to become. This article had a different tone , it was relaxed , an eye opener and fun. From reading the 107 responses , for some I can see they have changed but haven’t completely forgot about their past , whereas other who haven’t changed feels stuck in what they are. Some don’t come right out and say it but the tone of their description and the slight humor shows a lot. As is continue to read I’ve noticed the words that were created to hurt the transgender community is being adapted and used in a joking way. Society wants to place everyone in a box based on gender , unspoken rules are created to keep those within their born gender so to speak but from this article I can tell most if not all of the writers don’t want to be in one category. It’s takes a lot to completely abandon the sex you knew and the sex everyone expects you to be and become who you want. It means going against all of the societal norms you were raised to follow.

“ Faggot” is one of the most derogatory and hurtful comments people throw around. I can only imagine how words such as those can make someone feel. The use of the word is in no way funny and it’s nothing to use in a joking relationship from one boy to the next. In one explanation Pascoe says “ But becoming a fag has as much to do with failing at the masculine tasks of competence , heterosexual prowess and strength or in any way revealing weakness or femininity , as it does with a sexual identity. To say that being homosexual has something to do with lack of competence is ignorant and disrespectful to ones accomplishments and intelligence. Boys focus entirely too much on being called a “ fag “ than they do about being a unique individual separate from social norms or constructs. A few paragraphs down it’s says “ while certain behaviors put all boys at risk for becoming temporarily fag”, had to take a pause for a second. What is a “temporary fag”? Homosexual lifestyle isn’t something most people wake up one day and decide to be, people become so ignorant towards things they don’t fully comprehend. Continuing to read this study and seeing what activities high school kids deemed as being an gay activity made me think about my high school days. Remembering students who used these same terms for these same type of classes , but back then I didn’t acknowledge it or understand it as being ignorant. Hearing adult males in some way verify these statements didn’t make it seem like there was a huge problem with these derogatory comments. Pascoe later goes on to say that the boy students said they were going to hit on her but seemed to stop paying attention to her. In her opinion she believed it was because she had knowledge about “ guy “ things. Isn’t it funny guys have no problem using women to display their masculinity to other males but when a woman can challenge him or his position most males run away. What masculinity is that displaying ? A student by the name of Jake told her he didn’t like gay people but lesbians were good. Are lesbians not gay ? Or is it because he enjoys seeing women as sexual objects so two is better than one ? I’ll never understand the logic behind this kind of thinking. Another student made a comment to his classmate saying “ That’s a gay laptop! It’s five inches think !” , funny he’s trying to call someone else or an object gay but yet he’s the one thinking about how think something is , backwards isn’t it? 🤔 what’s that saying about people who use these terms? They wouldn’t be prevalent if the individual wasn’t already thinking in terms of something homosexual. Another student quotes Eminem saying h explains that he doesn’t call people faggot because of their sexual orientation but because they’re weak and unmanly , isn’t that still disrespectful to those who identify as homosexual? In my opinion none of these EXCUSES justify the use of these words. To say that homosexual and gay or fag aren’t the same or don’t derive from sexual orientation in my opinion isn’t true, whether kids use it the way they do or not. The word fag had everything to do with sexual orientation of a man and making fun of “ fags “ is displaying masculinity to other men.

Masculinity or rather the guidelines for it are completely made up by society and altered by each race. Yet, we hold it to such a high standard instead of displaying our own views of what it is to be a man or women. It’s amazing but not surprising how much societal norms can shape society for years , even centuries. When African American men first were studied , society failed to remember every African American isn’t the same. It bothered me that it was only years later when another study shinned New and positive light on African American men. Light that showed in many ways that an African American man does a lot more and is more connected with his family than a western cultured man. They aren’t just financial providers they’re also emotional providers , the stability of his family. On the second page of this article the mentioned a “ cool pose “, a coping mechanism for the African American man. They don’t exert power through dominance when they are feeling inadequate like western culture , instead they keep it to themselves and play things “ cool “. The topic of manhood , from the study, proved to have 15 categories and even when Hammond and Mattis tried to get each male to think about masculinity without race it was proved to be difficult. In my opinion, I think masculinity and race go hand and hand , as I said early masculinity shaped society but different races practice it differently. Most often the change to display masculinity is either hindered or prevent based on your race and the oppression against it.

We often speak of society limiting and holding women within a certain standard but we pay little attention to the everyday struggles men go through. Societal norms affect more than just women , they affect men as well. Where women are expected to be feminine , males are always expected to be aggressive, emotionless and perfect. This “ box “ keeps men afraid to be seen as or called gay and/or feminine. In my opinion I think this is one of the reason men don’t expect certain lifestyles , their taught that’s not a man. Libel says “ withdrawal of affection is emotional abuse “ , adults and society don’t realize that from a young again we create some of the violence within the men of our society , we teach them to be competitive and to constantly prove themselves. We teach them having feelings , showing emotions or crying isn’t manly , so how can we be upset when they show no feelings or emotions ? Imagine having to bottle up your feelings everyday , wanting love or someone to talk to but because you’re afraid of how you’d look . It’s a mental strain. Within this box there is still inequality between men of different races. For rich white men it’s a good thing to be in control and get your way but for a poor or working class black male they are punished for the same exact behavior !! Race plays a part in EVERYTHING within our society , it’s sad. White men are pushed towards careers where they control whereas black men are expected to be controlled. Can you imagine if black men controlled white men ? Putting them in a box just like the box black men are in . Black men are in a “ box” but within that box there’s another one. They deal with the gender issues of being a male as well as the race issues of being black. People of color or minorities have to deal with much more than just their gender issues , there’s a completely different issue at hand that white men won’t or haven’t experienced.

A lot of the information in this article I wasn’t aware of. There were women in hospitals refusing live saving drugs just so they can stay pretty and feminine and after everything women fought to get before this period . This seem to do a complete 360 , right back to women becoming housewives again. At the end of the 1950s ,fourteen million girls were engaged by 17. FOURTEEN MILLION ! They started to become more focused on marriage than on graduating college. Can you believe people stop going to college just because they thought it would lower their chance of getting married. Wow , you know I’m now starting to understand the title of this article . “The Problem That Has No Name” , it’s funny how societal norms will scare someone , a whole gender, into expressing or admitting they want to do something different. It’s like they were backed into the corner and scared that the world would never change , like there was something wrong with them. Theses stereotypes previously put into place are now causing women to become miserable, leaving each feeling empty. At this point they all want more. On page 28, Friedan says “ In the past sixty years we have come full circle and the American housewife is once again trapped in a squirrel cage”. I guess history does repeat itself if after sixty years women are somewhat back to the stereotypical housewives they once were. There’s a weird twist to the words , women who are housewives desire more and so do those whole have a fulfilling career and social life. Can’t there be a little bit of both in each of their lives

When kolmar and Bartkowski start to talk about Lexicon they start off discussing the body. Women can reproduce and have monthly cycles so they're looked at as dangerous and taboo. This idea of women leads to society deny them the opportunity to be about of certain jobs or work their way to a certain level. According to Mylvey,Kaplan women's bodies are meant to be looked at. A women's body just like a males CAN be looked at but women aren't developed specifically to be looked at , that's not the only reason women are shaped how they are. Women aren't sexually objects for men , there's more to them that that. The Cobtagious Disease Act condemns men for promiscuity but encourages sale and sexual exploration of women. Why are men viewed more important than women ? What have they done that makes them more important? Why are men the only ones encouraged to protect themselves from diseases, why isn't women health or protection as important ? When the topic of essentialism came up a lot of quotes caught my eye. One was " one is not born a woman but becomes one through social and cultural processes. In fact , we are all born a women and later a male gets his distinctive genitalia. Are men now seen as alittle weaker ? Or do we ignore things that go against their superiority and masculinity and uphold practices that say women are inferior ? The second quote says " we do not need to share common oppression to fight equally ". We do not have to all go through the same thing or experience the same difficulties to fight together. We need UNITY , we all know what's morally right and wrong so why fight for change together. Under language Betty Friedan made a statement saying " women do not have the words to name their experiences". Not only are women not acknowledge but their pain, suffering , fighting or circumstances aren't even recognized. SHE can't tell you what's wrong because there is no name for it. SHE isn't heard because HE is more important and HER NO isn't acknowledge because his YES is all that matters to society. What is the world coming to ? What did we allow to continue ? What will WE do to change it ? Will WE try to change it?