giggling and kicking my feet as i kill you i kill you i kill you i kill you i kill you i kill you i kill you i kill you i kill y

"Stop saying 15 year olds with weird interests are cringe, they're 15" this is true however you should also stop saying adults with weird interests are cringe because who gives a shit

However you think this story will end is wrong

Hey. Why isn’t the moon landing a national holiday in the US. Isn’t that fucked up? Does anyone else think that’s absurd?

It was a huge milestone of scientific and technological advancement. (Plus, at the time, politically significant). Humanity went to space! We set foot on a celestial body that was not earth for the first time in human history! That’s a big deal! I’ve never thought about it before but now that I have, it’s ridiculous to me that that’s not part of our everyday lives and the public consciousness anymore. Why don’t we have a public holiday and a family barbecue about it. Why have I never seen the original broadcast of the moon landing? It should be all over the news every year!

It’s July 20th. That’s the day of the moon landing. Next year is going to be the 54th anniversary. I’m ordering astronaut shaped cookie cutters on Etsy and I’m going to have a goddamn potluck. You’re all invited.

Hey. Hey. Tumblr. Ides of March ppl. We can do this

(important to note: the postcard includes a chemical formula pasted next to the message. the chemical is testosterone.)

How the fuck does his have less than 200k after setting the internet on fire for months

I feel like the legal institution of adoption is unreasonably limited by restricting it to parent-child relationships. If me and some random asshole want to legally be second cousins, I think we should just be able to do that.

This concept is hilarious. Yes we're now cousins but there's no aunts/uncles/parents connecting us. Cut out the middle man completely. We're just family but not directly related ya know?

You understand me precisely.

For everybody saying "well ACTUALLY you can just decide to call whoever you want your uncle/cousin/whatever", this isn't about kinship – it's about bureaucracy. I want to cause problems on purpose.

my mom finally bought a toaster

why did this get notes

we’re happy for you

its just a toaster

it’s been three years since i made this post. stop congratulating me on the toaster! stop asking me how the new toaster is doing!! i don’t know!! i haven’t lived with my mom in almost a year! i haven’t seen that toaster in months!! she might even have a new new toaster now!!! who knows!? not me!

@egberts how’s the toaster?

well the 10 year update to this saga is that I don’t talk to my mom and I have my own toaster 👍 don’t let your dreams be dreams