hasta la bye bye, daddyo

i love you archival work. i love you alphabetizing. i love you sorting. i love you reshelving. i love you document restoration. i love you shelf reading. i love you inventorying. i love you analysis. i love you archival work.

at the jfk museum. this place is kind of objectively funny as hell i think

Can you imagine being rocky tossing over that capsule during first contact. Like oh yeah, theyll probably use their robotic arm to catch it. And then you see like. This horribly clumsy alien come out of the ship, flailing about, wiggling across the hull trying to catch the capsule. Like oh. Oh so thats the kind of species i am dealing with

The best part of getting older is aging out of the demographic that gets killed in horror movies. I am now the age of the kooky local at the gas station who warns the band of college kids not to go to Camp Murderblood

We've all gotten just a bit too comfortable being jerks to strangers on the internet I think

#idk why some of yall feel the need to like. iunno. be snide and petty for no other reason than weird social circle internet clout#like arent you tired? it seems so tiresome and yucky to constantly be jonesing for the opportunity to be just uh. kinda shitty lmao

Quick while the astronauts are no-transmission behind the moon let’s arrange the continents into a funny shape

this has been in my queue for an entire year

Happy Winter Solstice to all the heathens! And everyone else! But especially the heathens!

And a debauched Saturnalia to all of you 😳🥹

I love everything about this. 

"can you take care of this" i already did. an hour ago. i'm the fastest secretary in the west. i am the swiftest gazelle sprinting on the field of schedules and phone calls and emails. secretariat? the triple crown record holder? that was me too. seabiscuit get fucked. turning you to glue. i redid your dumbass filing system while i was at it. fuck with me