He's Mr Outerspace

You know I gotta learn shitpost brevity. Most of my successful posts are like 3 paragraph essays, minimum. Fucking dissertations. Terrible note-to-word ratio. Inefficient. In this economy? In this economy? Unsustainable. Everyone else posting "blowing my balls up at the bomb factory" and getting 50,000 notes. Amazing ROI. They're the future and I'm on dial-up. The market's gonna out-compete me.

Oat milk was discovered much more recently than you may have known. Like many now-familiar technologies, it was found by accident during the Apollo program when NASA learned what a zero-g environment does to goat milk.

STOP REBLOGGING THIS my phone is glitching an astronomical amount and I immediately knew the culprit was one of my tumblr posts gaining traction

DONT STOP ME NOW!

if "29" is your idea of an older woman you have a flickering pale aura and you will not survive daylight saving time

Your 20s are not about getting your life together they're about learning to escape the self imposed torture labyrinth you've built inside your own head

you will not see any actual improvement to the rate of disordered eating in the general population until you address fatphobia and improve social and material conditions for fat people and especially fat women enough that fatness isn't a looming spectre but unfortunately the lives of young women are considered a largely acceptable cost to not have to do this

every couple of years there's a new superhero movie that will have many people telling you "no I know marvel is bad but this one is different, it's really good!" stay vigilant. it's gonna be bad