Impulse

memes that get you unfriended by relatives on facebook

Well now I can correctly moonwalk away from uncomfortable situations

Because everyone deserves to know how to do a mean moonwalk.

guYS THIS IS IMPORTANT

I definitely reblogged this sitting down not getting up to do the moonwalk at all

the man who owns and runs the thai restaurant in my town knows me by name. he is one of the kindest and most thoughtful men i know. i started ordering from his place back in january, which was when i got my fibromyalgia diagnosis. back then i was using a walker, had limited mobility in my entire body but especially my hands, and was very visibly in pain. i always ordered the same thing: yellow curry with no meat, potatoes and carrots only (i have texture and other dietary issues). he always made it a point to make sure i could get out the door and carry the food safely. he had his workers package the food so that it was easier for me to open. as i kept coming back and i told him a little bit about my health status, he would always encourage me to keep going. he told me about how the spices he used were good for inflammation and began to edit the recipe just for me so that spices that were even better for fighting inflammation were used. he’d give me extra portions and despite the fact that i would tip every time, i realized later that he never charged my card for them. as time went on and my condition began to get better, especially with the help of a physical therapist, he would make encouraging remarks and tell me how happy he was for me. the day i came in without my walker, he practically jumped for joy, and despite my insistence, he gave me my meal for free that day. i continue to make progress with my conditions and i continue to go to the thai place. this man who does not know me personally and who i hardly know anything about is one of my favorite people. it’s interactions with humans like these that make loving life easier. and his curry really does help my chronic condition. it’s comfort food taken to the next level.

So play like a noob? got it

You’re joking, but it actually is a popular theory in chess that a complete noob potentially can beat a master by confusing them - as the noob doesn’t know what they’re doing the master is unable to recognize which of valid strategies they’re pursuing and cannot deploy proper counterstrategy.

I know what a master is doing, I just may not be faster than them. I know I’m faster than a newbie but hey what the fuck is happening?

I have, on rare occasions, won pokemon battles like this. I have no idea what the meta is, and just slap things together that sound cool. It’s fun when you win by taking someone completely off guard because “Who would run that?!” Idk man, the noob that just kicked your ass. I’m not smart enough for all these mind games that go into serious competitive pokemon, but I do know big laser go pew.

The Newbie Flail™ is the most terrifying attack imaginable.

“The best swordsman on the planet doesn’t fear the second-best swordsman. He fears the new swordsman, because he has no idea what the lunatic will do.”

One of the main reasons fencing against a total beginner can be difficult is that they have no self-preservation. They either don’t know or don’t care to defend themselves the way someone with more experience does, and have no issue leaving themselves vulnerable to make attacks, which breaks down the usual tempo of a fight and puts you on the defensive (because you value your safety), and you don’t want to be on the defensive.

If I had a nickel every time I recieved fencing advise from a trans girl on tumblr with the term catgirl in her url I’d have two nickels! Which you know it’s not a lot but it’s funny it happened twice.

We have a long and treasured warrior history. Google “warrior cats” to find out more

ma’am could you please take a step back. yes—yes ma’am it’s because of your AOE poison attack aura

-1

-1

ma’am please

Koga: welcome to my poison-type ninja gym. it’s full of jugglers who use psychic-types. fuck you for thinking you know me.

everyone keeps making fun of phoenix wright for interogating a parrot but no one ever talks about how von karma somehow had the foresight to fucking retrain the parrot in advance. how fucking crazy is that. its one thing for phoenix to grasp at straws and ask the judge to cross examine a parrot in the heat of the moment, its another thing for a grown ass accomplished prosecutor to stop in the middle of schemeing to be like... hmm i have tampered with all the witnesses now... but let me just retrain this parrot in case wright calls it to the stand. like, he had NO reason to assume that was going to happpen

It's so messed up that Coca Cola is one of the quintessential symbols of the US globally, a drink sold across the world and known for being refreshing and delicious, but if you actually go to the US and drink it, it tastes like ass.

the “i am from russia” was a warning

I asked a taxi driver in Bucharest to take the quickest route to the airport. 10 minutes later we’re doing 120kph the wrong way done the street car tracks when another taxi tried to pass us and dude just floors it. Never spoke a word, smoked 9 cigarettes over the 30 minute ride, never took off his sunglasses and blasting opera all the way. I look at it as paying 15€ plús tip to lose all fear of death.

the “i am from russia” was both a warning and a promise, and one that would weirdly put me at ease about the situation.