Fig Tree & Vine

This is the funniest fucking thing I’ve ever seen.

Perfect example of an untranslatable joke. 😂

The Bible doesn't include God making queers because it wasn't relevant to His journey

I feel a suicidal urge to run my fingers through her wet fur. Like, bad bad! idea, but I want to.

vaseline is op for fucked up skin but its texture stat is dogshit

The other name for Vaseline is evil tho. Petroleum jelly 💀

yeah omg some people were calling me out for using a "brand" but i am NOT calling it that. SORRY.

This is probably the most inclusive post ever made on Tumblr

Also a lot of people really just. Raw dog taking care of a cat. So they'll tell me "my cat never wants to eat or drink >:/" sir you are putting their food immediately next to their water and they are hardwired to avoid that because of cross-contamination. You will literally solve this if you put the water and the food on the opposite sides of the room or the house in worst case and it takes like thirty seconds to Google.

^^^^^^^ I had this problem with Ollie and I'd never had a cat do that before!!! SUCH an easy fix

The way that most of Conan Doyle’s Sherlock Holmes stories’ most horrible villains are rich dudes that are abusive to women, in a time such as the 1880’s, compels me.

There’s a whole subset of Sherlock Holmes stories that could be labeled Asshole Guys Try to Control Women’s Money.

Yup, there’s a huge number of times where Sherlock Holmes is the ONLY person to take a young woman’s complaint or worry seriously and finds out someone is up to some serious evil.  Holmes also shows a lot of compassion and empathy with the victims over and over again.  (This is why I find “Secretly a woman” or “Trans” Holmes headcanons much more convincing than “sociopath” Holmes.)

This is also the basis for a lot of speculation about Holmes’ family life.  The idea that he has been a victim of abuse, or his mother was abused (or even murdered by his father.)  There’s definitely SOMETHING that makes him very aware of how dangerous isolated families can be, and the dark things that can happen behind closed doors.  Plus, of course, the motivation to devote himself to stopping crime.  And yes, so much of it is of the personal type. 

dude see this is one aspect of the original books i NEVER understand why modern remakes (cough cough) don’t go all in on. Like, in the 21th c we HAVE all the dumb forensic shit that made Victorian Holmes stand out, but we STILL DON’T HAVE uh….you know, compassion for women and minorities, or the willingness to believe them, adequate community support for domestic violence or hate crimes, etc. etc. which you’d think is exactly where a renegade consulting detective would come in handy. A good modern day Sherlock Holmes remake, instead of trying to convince us that Holmes is some super genius for being better than fingerprint analysis or whatever, could have him just be…a good person who helps out people the police can’t and won’t help. There you go. That’s how to write a relevant modern Holmes.

One thing that annoys me is how much the BBC version of Sherlock (and the fandom around it) focus on police cases or cold cases.  In the stories, Holmes’ bread and butter cases had fuck-all to do with the police and in a few stories, he actively works around/against them, or outright lies to them.  Of the many, many things I wish that show had done differently, this is one is particularly obnoxious since it’s such a gimme.

#my favorite murder in holmes canon#is when they straight up witness a lady murder her blackmailer#do nothing except destroy his other blackmail material#and then straight up lie to lestrade about it#sherlock holmes#more of this in modern adaptations pls (via @cactusspatz )

Let’s not forget the time Holmes helps a young woman who’s being catfished by her own stepfather to steal her inheritance, and when the villain sneers that the law can’t touch him, Holmes grabs a horsewhip out of sheerest chivalry.

So, the most canon-accurate iteration of Sherlock Holmes in the last few decades is actually Benoit Blanc….