Because Fluff, that's why

"just write a little every day" ok but what if i write nothing for 3 weeks and then suddenly type like i’m being hunted by god

non-writers will never understand the mental illness of writing an entire conversation in your head while doing dishes and then forgetting every word the second you open a blank doc

You have to keep watching

This is INCREDIBLE.

when i was reading the book entangled life which is about fungi and the author merlin sheldrake said that once he got his first author copies he was going to dampen the pages and use them to grow oyster mushrooms and yeast and then use the yeast to brew beer and then drink the beer with the mushrooms to complete the cycle of fungal knowledge. i was like really and truly this guy gets it

I’m not sure how or why, but this is goth as FUCK. 

borders between countries aren't real btw we just made them up. there's no such thing as an "immigrant" we're all just people moving around on the same planet that we've always moved around on

Idk, I have autism, most of my friends have autism, and none of us have ever done nazi shit. It's so bizarre when privileged white people with autism always have "being extremely racist" autism but no poc with autism ever seems to have that. I don't think it's your autism I think you're just a horrible racist.

they want you to make fried rice

who is "they"

the wok left

how am I supposed to make fried rice if the wok left

skillet issue

54 year old married straight truck drivers

Your 43 year old family dentist

my 36 year old ass

we don't even celebrate fingers in his ass sunday anymore

the most disorienting thing thats ever happened to me was when a linguistics major stopped in the middle of our conversation, looked me in the eye, and said, "you have a very interesting vernacular. were you on tumblr in 2014?" and i had to just stand there and process that one for a good ten seconds

#i was in a car with a linguist i had never met before the car trip and like half an hour in he looked at me#after i finished describing a geology thing that was happening out the window and asked if i'd ever spent much time on tumblr#the fuckor of it all#and then we spent six more hours driving#it sure does leave linguistic markers! i'm not sure i'm good with it (tags via @thoughtsformtheuniverse)

it is one thing to be a linguist and another to be a linguist who knows enough of 2010s Tumblr to spot one of its enjoyers

I'm not sure what's more concerning here: the idea that the Tumblr vernacular, a principally written idiom, is discernible in spoken communication, or the fact that if you click through to the original post, its contents appear to have been replaced at some point in the last two months with Minecraft YouTuber fanfic.

You just know the ye olde peasants went NUTS at that last part

We don’t say sblood enough we should bring it back