Squid time @fawkesthefox - Tumblr Blog

who wants to photoshop my cat into situations to bother my sister with (he likes her more than me)

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shencomix

My Fitness Coach is a Dark Wizard [Complete]

necromancelena

If you went to a bar and the bartender was a mousegirl you could ask for a drink and she would balance it on her head and say "for you, it's on the mouse"

megapope-deactivated20220531

the crazy thing about this is that it took one single word to turn it horny. coulda been a normal cute post. coulda taken the high road & conjured a delightful image of a mouse scampering down the bar with a beer ten times its size balanced on its head. but you had to say "mousegirl" and not "mouse." don't pretend this isn't what's going on either i know the score i know what's up. i'm familiar with this sort of semantic trick. you want to fuck down on an anime girl with certain characteristics of a rodent and everyone's gotta know.

basileater

>10 hours ago

>deactivated

agave

hellsitegenetics

String identified: t t a a a t at a a g c a a a aac t a a a " , t' t " t ca tg at t tat t t g t t t . ca a a ct t. ca ta t g a & c a gt ag a cag t a t a t t t aac t a. t a t a "g" a t "." 't t t 't at' gg t t c at' . ' aa t t t atc tc. at t c a a g t cta caacttc a t a ' gtta . >ag >actat #ga g cat t t t t t

Closest match: Codakia orbicularis genome assembly, chromosome: 11 Common name: Tiger Lucine

(image source)

throathole

I really love when cats use their front legs to hold something in place while they use their back legs to kick the absolute shit out of it

throathole

Destruction. Annihilation, even

beesmygod

i read this to adam and he just yelled, outraged, "THEYRE BABIES"

wonderhecko

TRUE HATERS, SINCE DAY 1 THEY HAVENT BEEN GIVING THEM A FUCKING INCH

beesmygod

this is next level

wonderhecko

20 years later. you're kermit. opening night at the muppet theater. you look up. you can't believe it. those two awful cunts from next door are here. neither of them died yet. they're going to be here, forever.

charlesoberonn

They're immortal.

They were heckling the actors in Ford's theater on the day Lincoln was shot.

They heckled the first reading of the Epic of Gilgamesh.

They heckled the first lifeform to crawl onto land.

They heckled the big bang.

charlesoberonn

"They say that time exists now."

"I can tell."

"How so?"

"Because this show is a waste of it!"

"DOHOHOHOHOHO!"

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softichill

I think abt this tiktok all the time

thesadcyborg9million

Diversity hire bryson ur absolutely slaying

dogpuppy

mandywondering

I mean, in some very interesting Technically Correct ways, they didn't actually die? Now, they're very much no longer alive. But the forces involved are such that they didn't get any of the usual cellular processes of death, they simply went from biology to physics in less time than it takes a signal to travel down your optic nerve.

dietspam16

if you go from biology to physics without dying first you don’t go to heaven the uber driver went over this already

t4timekeeper

we need to romanticize lying on the floor and not doing anything

impossiblycyberenthusiast

op is actually napstablook from hit indie game Undertale (1915)

impossiblycyberenthusiast

I MEANT 2015

e350tb

playing undertale in the trenches with the lads before the Big Push

aureutr

Unfriendly reminder that if you're displeased with a piece of fanfiction your courses of action are:

Read something else

Bitch PRIVATELY to friends

Write your own take on the premise (strongly recommend!)

All of the above

Under no circumstances should you try to "politely" critique the author who put the story up as a hobby. For free. Especially if the story in question is multiple years old. Ao3 is not Goodreads

dumbpuppyfag

smitten is such a great word :) omg he's so cute it feels like i'm being killed by god

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good-fwiend-in-wome

shoutout to flags that look like landscapes fr gotta be one of my favorite genders

jonnystrebor

Not to forget:

worldheritagepostorganization

World Heritage Post

sreegs

gonna start making snopes-style responses to urban legends about tumblr

sreegs

"this how we lost post editing and it was still worth it"

❌ False

The John Green Cock Monologue, while one of the most egregious examples of post editing, was not why the ability to edit posts was taken away. This feature was removed because scammers would edit posts with huge note counts to try to make their scams look legit.

sreegs

"those are his hooves, bitch."

✅ True

Those are his hooves, bitch.

innumerable-voices

1 in 5 people are probably plural

5 in 1 person is definitely plural

innumerable-voices

Top contender for my dumbest post ever

radiowithnohead

i’ve been laughing for a solid 15 minutes over this dude who got banned from r/food for his potato recipe

bramblepatch

Grace explaining sheepishly to Eridian linguists that the reason he uses different pronouns for Rocky than for the rest of the population is that he reflexively defaulted to assigning Rocky the same grammatical and social gender that he himself uses, in a way that has historical precedent but in modern English is considered somewhat chauvinistic and backward, and he's not proud of it but also the habit is pretty deeply ingrained now and unless Rocky objects it's probably easier to just keep on as he has been...

and immediately being informed lol. lmao. do not even worry about it. you have no idea what kind of buck wild grammatical constructs Rocky has invented for you. everyone else addresses you as foreigner/scholar. they're somehow managing to refer to you as their sibling, ward, and semidivine culture hero at the same time every time they talk about you.

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dreadwife

it's so funny when men try to act like walter white is a stoic badass when he spends 50% of the show's run time looking like this

fel-iii-ne

It's actually kind of insane.

sanguine-tenshi

Bloodymary is at its best when it's a beaten down dog trying to domesticate a feral cat.

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