Objectively Creative

Only in the water of rivers and ponds could he look at his face. And the very posture he had to assume was symbolic. He had to bend over, stoop down, to commit the ignominy of beholding himself.

The inventor of the mirror poisoned the human heart.

ファンアート　セーラームーン

Kittens can’t regulate their own body temperature. That’s why they pile up.

Cats see us as colony members.

Masha saw a kitten that was on its own, no mommy, no other kittens to cuddle with. She instinctively knew that was a cold kitten. She knew that a kitten alone on a cold night was very likely to die. Because a kitten would have died too.

So, all she was doing was what any good colony member does - protecting the abandoned kitten. Then when the abandoned kitten’s mommy didn’t come back, she called the rest of the colony for help.

People have this bizarre idea that housecats don’t have a social sense. They do, and it saved this kid’s life. And possibly Masha’s too, as life on the streets is dangerous for a kitty.

Until, of course, they showed it to a traditional leatherworker and she took one look at it and said “Oh yeah sure that’s a leather burnisher, you use it to close the pores of leather and work oil into the hide to make it waterproof. Mine looks just the same.” 

“Wait you’re still using the exact same fucking thing 50,000 years later???”

“Well, yeah. We’ve tried other things. Metal scratches up and damages the hide. Wood splinters and wears out. Bone lasts forever and gives the best polish. There are new, cheaper plastic ones, but they crack and break after a couple years. A bone polisher is nearly indestructible, and only gets better with age. The more you use a bone polisher the better it works.”

It’s just. 

When Russians get tipsy they say “У меня вертолёты.” Lit. “I have the helicopters.”

There are two kinds of envy in Russian. “белая зависть” or “white envy” which is the good kind, where ultimately you are genuinely happy for the person and their good fortune. I think you can guess the other kind.

Russian’s terms of endearment are the best. “Солнышко” lit. “my small sun” and “Дорогуша” meaning “dearie” are among my favorites

Your first semester as a uni student is called “Боевое крещение” lit. “baptism by fire.” 

 When a Russian person feels like you are pulling their leg, they might say “Не надо мне лапшу на уши вешать” which means “don’t try to play me.” The literal translation? “Don’t hang noodles on my ears”

You extend your hand. “I noticed you’re new here. What’s your name?”

Clark’s introducing her around.  “This is my good friend, Diana, she’s in from out of town.”

Clark stops a few feet away and squints at you worriedly from behind those ridiculous glasses you’re 99% sure he doesn’t actually need, and asks tentatively, “Everything all right?”

You ignore him in favor of staring at the inky dark numerals hovering over the beaming fool gesticulating some fantastic yacht story for a gaggle of secretaries and minor columnists.

tigers chasing a drone