daphne and velma, noir style 💜🧡

take for example: hair

in our western culture, men = short hair, women = long hair, right? this has literally nothing to do with biology or even fact. Biologically, men and women grow hair at the exact same rate and can grow hair very long if they simply do not cut it, so biologically men and women can have any length of hair. factually, there have been many periods of time where men’s hair is fashionably longer than, say, a buzz cut (think 70s), and women’s hair is can be fashionably very short (think the 60s mod pixie cut). these fashions don’t change or even challenge the idea of men=short hair, women=long hair, because ultimately that’s not true in any sense except in so far as it’s a myth we’re conditioned to believe, so that we also keep believing the myth of men over women. we see men with long hair and women with buzzed heads in our lives, but we don’t change our gendered perceptions of hair.

The reason we believe men=short hair, women=long hair as a masculine vs feminine ideal is not because...women look better with long hair, or men look better with short hair, or it just "makes more sense." We have culturally assigned value to these “facts” of short hair vs long hair, and masculine ideals for men will be positive and feminine ideals will be negative. Long hair on women means more time and energy on her beauty routine. Women treating her long hair well by styling and caring is “vain” when we want to cast her in a negative light or “beautiful” when we want to cast her in a positive light (and beautiful on women is all about objectifying women for the male gaze). long hair on women is seen as conforming and short hair on women is seen as defiant, but if women have long hair but otherwise act non-compliant or don't invest the "appropriate" amount of upkeep, they'll be seen as slovenly even more so than a woman with shorter hair who is otherwise "compliant". on the other hand, short hair on men isn’t seen as conforming as much as it’s seen as a non issue, and long hair on men is seen as a choice, one of conviction or style, progressive, artistic, etc. This is culturally as a whole, not per individual. their extremely conservative dad may hate their long hair, but culturally they are not punished. Additionally, long hair on men does not come close to the standard of upkeep we expect from women. what is seen as well kept hair on men (basic combing, very natural) is seen as unkempt in women (are you going to do anything with your hair??).

at any moment, culture can shift. it can shift that masculinity is long hair and femininity is short hair. the values and connotations would not shift with it, instead they would morph to conform to the ultimate myth of men over women. Long hair would be seen as a sign of sexual potency, virility, dignified, or maybe we would relate to a warriors spirit or we would expect men to braid it or color it in some way to signify something alluring about himself. it doesn’t matter...it literally could be anything. women’s short hair would still relate to beauty, would relate to meekness and piety, would be about constant upkeep. imagine if women were expected to shave their heads...they would be expected to do it every day, or else be seen as unkempt. are men expected to do that now, even when expected to keep a buzz cut? any amount of hair would be a sign that she’s “letting herself go”. long hair would be seen as defiant and aping men. meanwhile a man cutting off his long hair would be seen as an act of heroism: he’s standing against cultural norms, he’s making a statement. and in the end, haircuts for men will still be $10 and haircuts for women would still be $40.

This is only one example, and does not only apply to superficial, appearance based norms. It extends to how we perceive the exact same personality traits between men and women. A man and a woman could behave exactly the same in demeanor, but a cultural narrative will develop to explain how it's different between them, and that narrative will benefit the man.

Period drama + 🍂🍁

EMMA. (2020)

ANNE OF GREEN GABLES (1985)

MARIE ANTOINETTE (2006)

CRIMSON PEAK (2015)

BRIGHT STAR (2009)

MR. MALCOLM'S LIST (2022)

BECOMING JANE (2007)

there are things you should be doing now to prevent yourself from starting to look like 🥀

Why does it matter? Future you would like to avoid the pain, limited motion, and fall risk that goes along with worsening posture.

What’s the focus?

1. Keep the flexibility in your spine

2. Stretch the muscles in the front

3. Strengthen the muscle in the back

Here are some simple things you can do daily while sitting and when you get up to go into the bathroom or the kitchen

Keep the flexibility by doing these repeated movements: 10 repetitions several times a day

The goal is to give yourself a double or triple chin. Keep your nose pointing forward, don’t let it tip up or down

Thoracic extension- use a chair with a seat back that comes up to the level of your shoulder blades. Try to bend back over the top of the chair without arching away from the seat back and without extending your neck. If the pressure from the top of the chair is uncomfortable you can place a towel there

Stretch the muscles in the front by using a door frame. This one will feel good afterwards

If this isn’t enough of a stretch you can do one side at a time. If you have the right arm up step forward with the right foot and turn slightly to the left. Then do it on the other side.

Strengthen the muscles in the back by squeezing your shoulder blades together for a count of 10 and then repeating 10 times. You can do this several times a day Hint: Don’t lift your shoulder blades up

There are lots more exercises for strengthening your back muscles but this is a good starting point and easy to do. I like doing it while driving

Tips:

Do the best you can

If it hurts stop

she was a mother to a young child. her own mother had to identify her body by watching the horrific video online.

i don't know enough to speak on this war, so i won't be, but remember this: when men wage war, it's women who pay the price. it's women who are sexually abused, degraded, and tortured.

there hasn't been a single war in history that has avoided this. revenge rape. comfort women. forced prostitution. every war, every side, every time.

no israeli woman deserves this treatment. no palestinian woman deserves this treatment. there are no women in this war who deserve this.

Yeah it’s in all likelihood a ‘they know they’re not allowed to say she deserved it’ thing. The smugness and humor in recounting her alleged abuses is such an obvious unspoken denial of her alleged violence to have A) actually happened, or, giving them some benefit of the doubt, B) been an actual serious harm done to a human being.

I don’t account to no man. You’re accountin’ to me. I love you, and that gives me the right to— That don’t give you no right to own me. There’s only one that does, and that’s me. Myself.