oof

ANIMALS:

catenarwhal: #mandatory 'how cows produce milk' mention#i'll never recover from that one I fear

piromantic: #one time i saw someone fake their way through describing how spiders behave

pluto-lichen: horses

misskittypotter: #stardew valley faking its way through what fresh fish smell like

pa-pa-plasma: #saw someone faking their way through knowing what a seal is once #i still am fucked up over that one to this day. they just straight up did not know #& they were NOT good at guessing it either like it was clear they had never googled that animal ever #& was only just now realizing via answering questions from anons that seals are not!! what they assumed. initially

SEX:

dykevandyke: #what a prostate is #and where it is located #as in. external.

dreamyeyedrose: #I remember back in the ff.net days reading an Ichigo/Renji fic where the writer assumed the penises go inside each other #and I was like “I mean I don't know how it works for sure I don't have one but idk if that's how it works”

SOME OTHER FOOD STUFF:

thetrekkiehasthephonebox: #add another one to the list bloggers#this character is cooking a salad

shosta: #still baffled about the published work that didn't know food could freeze

sun-dari: #once i read a fic where the author didn't understand cinnamon

alto-tenure: #read something recently where the author was just. blatantly wrong about spices

dramatic-dolphin: #i saw someone try to fake their way through what ramen is once. like 14 years ago.#but i remember.#i was very confused about ramen for a few months. they were writing it so authoritatively.

the-celery-stalks-at-midnight: #i will never ever forget someone putting leftover fries in the microwave to reheat them and setting the timer for five minutes

typeghost: #this sparked a memory of a hannibal fic where the author had to fake their way through writing about gravy

draculin: #the one fanfic where the author knows about coffee only as a concept wrote a character as a coffee drinker#was very interesting#I don't remember the fandom or the plot but I was mesmerized by the coffee actions and choices

11235811235811: #there's a lot of faking their way thru congee in the svsss fandom i'll also note

fishali3n: #read one where the person clearly didnt know what tofu is

emmy-everafter: #in the aftermath of shadow and bone s2 i saw a lot of people pretending to know what stroopwafels are #babes they are more like cookies than breakfast waffles #like yes there is a waffle pattern but you're not gonna cut into a stack of them with syrup and sugar#🤣🤣🤣

NON-FOOD STUFF:

red-umbrella-811: Shoutout to Dame Agatha Christie for faking her way through what a wrench is in a very popular published work.

bluebeetle: #once saw someone have a character put an entire phone book in their pocket

nonametis: #- sex talk in languages other than english #<- or just the petnames in a different language other than English

sadisticpony: #the fanfiction i saw this week where op DIDNT KNOW HOW AUTOMATIC DOORS WORKED #and that they arent in peoples homes!!! of course. also opening the automatic door for someone is unironically very funny but its not #its not like. grabbing the door handle to let someone in. helpppp

danmeichael: #reminds me of the fic with the figure drawing class where the character started with the feet. #i love you feet first figure drawing author

meowmix1100blr: #me watching this one fic absolutely obliterate what the board of directors does

vexedhexes: #one time i read an architect character making a doorway bigger by building a bigger door #what a beautiful world. #OH. also gravity falls fic where they go 'oh piedmont is in california so its warm all year round'

leveragehunters: #characters going to a beer garden #And it's literally a garden outside the pub#It was a very cute mistake

fitofpique: #yes! #grown men do not get blind drunk off two beers #but i am possibly guilty of the hypothermia one #assuming it does not make you very horny?

dadvans-likes: #always thinking abt the soup kitchen fic #the entire setting of the fic was 'soup kitchen' #and i very quickly realized #the author did not know what a soup kitchen was #and they thought that soup kitchens only served soup #fic

msmargaretmurry: #i love fanfiction #once read a fic where the characters played 20 questions #but the author seemed to not know how to play 20 questions and was just kind of winging it........ #immaculate

shakespeareaddict: #Look I know not all of us are hockey experts #But it takes about ten seconds of research or any attention paid to the show to realize #That the Stanley cup playoffs are not in fucking September

baejax-the-great: #the funniest one i saw #was someone faking what church is like #like 1. they really didn't have to write an entire church experience for their fic #and 2. they had clearly never even watched a show where people went to church #it was bonkers weird

twosunson: #things ive seen authors faking #knowing how to unclog a drain #knowing. literally any history #knowing what ketamine looks like (apparently- oregano) #(you know who you are)

waterhorseyblues-ao3: #beltane being celebrated in winter #wales being portrayed as a completely separated land from england (i wish) #characters getting up after weeks of bedrest like that dosnt completely fuck you up

violetfairydust: #i once read a fic where the flight time from london to seattle was 3 hours

IMAGE 1: Smosh fanart of various figures of Sarah Christ and the Chosen.

Figure 1: 2 identical busts of Sarah with a look of dread, titled: “Sarah ‘women are my specialty’ Christ.” The first has greasy choppy bangs, and the second has long wet strands of hair alongside her face, labeled: “classic vs overgrown bangs.”

Figure 2: A bust of Sarah blowing a strand of hair out of her face in annoyance, labeled: “needs haircut (not gonna get one).”

Figure 3: Sarah Christ and the Chosen in the Spiderverse mentor meme with Sarah as Peter B Parker and the Chosen as Miles Morales. Sarah is thinking of the Creekside Killer while Chosen is thinking of Sarah. Beside Sarah is the bisexual flag with the quote, “Put some tits on that guy, I’d fuck him,” and beside Chosen is the trans flag with the quote, “I saw the board game glow,” as well as a note underneath that reads: “(idek which direction i just know it to be true).” The figures are colored in a blue and pink palette.

IMAGE 2: Smosh fanart of various figures of Sarah Christ and the Chosen.

Figure 1: Sarah and the Chosen redrawn in a Brooklynn 99 meme. Sarah has choppy bangs and is holding Chosen to her chest protectively and aggressively says, “If anything happens to the Chosen, I’m killing everyone in this room and then myself.” His face is expressionless and squished in her embrace.

Figure 2: The Chosen is drawing out his sword in defense of Sarah as he says, “Don’t worry, Sarah! If this guy wants to mess with you, he’s gonna have to get through ME first.” He looks the same as before, but Sarah has overgrown bangs. Behind him, she draws a line across her throat in a threatening death glare. The text above points to both figures 1 and 2, reading: “Characterized by: devotion + delusion (interchangeable between them).”

Figure 3: A headshot of Sarah with overgrown bangs, giving a side-eye and holding a cigarette between her lips. Sunglasses sit atop her head with the note: “Still has the sunglasses Chosen gave her :”)” Another note points to her cigarette that reads: “Just holding it.”

VIDEO DESCRIPTION: Smosh Mouth clips of The Chosen & Sarah Christ episode with OP’s commentary as follows:

“the chosen [handshake emoji] sarah christ: i would kill for you.”

“there’s a naive but genuine sweetness in the way that the chosen thinks of sarah and wonders why misfortune seems to follow her”

“he chalks up her “bad luck” to mirrors instead of her own reckless actions, which speaks to his superstitions but even more so his admiration of her”

“so it’s significant that the chosen later gifts sarah charmed sunglasses to protect her from ‘dark forces’”

“they look out for each other in their own ways :”)”

IMAGE 3: Screenshots of Sarah Christ subtitles from various Smosh videos against a bisexual flag background, as follows:

“Before I knew it, I, Sarah Christ, had fallen deeply in love with Amanda Lehan-Canto.”

“Let’s just say I wasn’t a wet cop until I met Amanda.”

“You don’t know anything about gay pride, do you?”

“Put some tits on that guy, I’d (bleep) him.”

“Women are my specialty.”

IMAGE 4: Screenshot of a comment section from the Chosen Trivial Pursuit: Try Not To Laugh video, as follows:

Commenter: “the chosen canonically being aware of I Saw the TV Glow is INSANE”

Reply 1: “I mean he has undeniable tboy swag”

Reply 2: “one day the chosen’s egg will crack”

OP’s note pointing to both replies (colored in trans colors): “I like that these both co-exist for the Chosen.”