Education About Systems @education-over-demonization - Tumblr Blog

Introduction

OVERVIEW: this blog focuses on Dissociative Identity Disorder (DID), and in turn can be applied to OSDD (other specified dissociative disorders) as well. Any attempts to start or bring us into syscourse will be deleted. That being said, this blog focuses on trauma based disorders, if you don’t like this we suggest that you simply block us.

WHO: we’re the starfish system, and we will place an intro of some of those you’re likely to hear from here below a cut.

INTROS: below the cut, these will give you an idea of who in the system is running this blog as well as what a host team looks like for us

#intro post #dissociative system

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kerink

i know we're all sick of self-care being a marketing tactic now, but i don't think a lot of us have any other concept of self-care beyond what companies have tried to sell us, so i thought i'd share my favorite self-care hand out

brought to you by how mad i just got at a Target ad

themythicalcodfish

OP this is EXCELLENT

whatbigotspost

Now THAT’S a self care resource! If you’ve gotten distracted by capitalism’s appropriation of “self-care” and watering the meaning down to nothing this is a super helpful guide to cut through the bullshit.

aropride

people have got to get normaler about systems

aropride

no we are not going to kill anyone

fictive introjects aren't literally blorbo from your show and expecting them to act exactly the same as blorbo is weird

introjects who arent fictives exist also

u cant just demand someone else fronts it's rude and weird. also talking to a system isn't really a choose your own adventure type of thing

no there isn't an "evil alter"

persecutor alters do exist and are common but they arent evil alters and should be treated with the same respect youd treat anyone else

some systems have like 2 or 3 members and others have hundreds. its generally not ur business why a system has the amount of alters they do

u arent entitled to know whos fronting 24/7. a lot of systems dont even always know whos fronting let alone want to share

switching is often not obvious or dramatic at all. it can be but generally it's not.though it does depend if someone has a more overt or covert presentation

did isnt actually that rare. around 1.5% of people are diagnosed with did and it goes undiagnosed a lot. and 1.5% is around the same amount of people who have red hair or ocd or green eyes

you have absolutely no way of knowing if someone is "faking" or lying about being a system. "what about-" nope not even if they do that. almost everything that people claim make it obvious someones lying (nonhuman alters, bigger systems, overt presentation etc) are just... ways that systems exist. ur not in their head, u dont get to decide what theyre experiencing

no we arent possessed

yes it is a real disorder

dankcptsdmemes

mosaic-system

The constant war

fangirlinginleatherboots

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reimeichan

oh sure when actors playing a character with DID or otherwise acting as multiple people in one body switch between alters on screen they're "such a talented actor" and you "get chills" but when I, actual diagnosed DID system, switch in front of you, it's "scary and unnerving" and you "no longer know how to talk to me".

Yes, I tried to learn something from Google searches, documentaries or essays. It is difficult, because there's a lot of misinformation, that's why I felt the need to ask here.

"DID is tricky because even if a final fusion occurred that person is at risk for splitting again, as it’s what the brain is used to and brains love patterns". I think that this that you say is key. I have to bear in mind that, and it happens with the majority of disorders, so, comparing, I kind of get the idea.

About the non-human alters! I understand so much more know, because of what you said, with the example of being a witness of the situation and as a mechanism. What I was asking came to me when I saw that some systems sign their names on their posts depending on who is fronting, as well as pronouns, etc. I don't understand what happens there when the alter fronting is non-human.

I hope this time my description helps. I know I'm being messy.

I completly understand the family issue. It happens to any neurodivergent person but I can't imagine what kind of torture it most be in a DID case.

What you say about getting a diagnose is the most honest, clair and human testimony I have heard. I can't agree more. The vulnerability that lies when you are no longer being able to deny it, and living a reality that isn't for you or hasn't been for your mind, is something huge. And if I talk about the bravery it takes to accept it and try to be okay, better, and doing it for yourself, even in a world that not only doesn't help, well… I won't end.

"I do consider them to be family while someone who fronts less may not". I was supposing that. It makes total sense. Thank you.

Haha, I'm glad I didn't fuck up this time. And that's it, to destigmatize the DID to other people. I wish I could do that, having enough information and right, but I will try to stigmatize every time less through learning. That's something I CAN do and I SHOULD do.

This is an opinion of mine, so maybe it's just bullshit (probably). But it seems to me that the DID develops in especially sensitive and intelligent people.

The brain could simply shut down from the trauma, but in these cases it develops a system so complex that it is still difficult even for the people who carry it to understand. But it may be one more possibility among the reactions to a trauma. It is something so unacceptable that it forces a child to shield himself and turn his mind because he is defenseless against a reality from which he can neither shield nor modify.

Once again, thank you enormously. Rest assured that I will not stop my interest here, I know that I have a lot to learn. You have helped me more than you can imagine.

As far as nonhuman alters, what fronting looks like will vary because no two are the same. For me it's fairly easy as my role involves me talking, socializing, driving, reading, writing, all the things a person would do. Although it does feel a little funky within the first few minutes as it feels like adjusting to a new body, but this isn't exclusive to nonhuman alters, plenty of human alters have to adjust to the fact that the body may not be anything like what they are like. Our body is fairly short, so if someone taller fronts this can make things very annoying for them'. As far as inanimate objects, it could simply look like sitting. For example a statue alter may be very still and work to blend in with scenery. For us we have an ANP near the front so if human behavior is needed we can simply step in to help out there.

And as far as sensitivity, people who are a little odd or "sensitive" far more likely to be subject to abuse. So someone with preexisting mental conditions or "anomalies" is more likely to be subject to the abuse that would cause a system to form. A child who is aware that they aren't like their peers is far easier to manipulate, and less likely to have people to protect them. "Normal" kids are easy. ND kids are not. It's awful but it's very easy for people to ignore and call us dramatic.

We also are seen as sensitive because sometimes it's necessary. We need to be attune to every little thing, be aware of anything that might hint that someone is displeased so we can change. And someone who is sensitive and desperate to please is an abusers dream, so while this can be a quality that is present pre-trauma most kids are sensitive, and this trait is something that is cultivated. Abused kids are groomed and conditioned to be hyper-aware of how to please, thus this translates to sensitivity.

And DID is a way of shutting down sometimes, especially with inanimate objects. Rather than fight, you become the object you're treated as, making it easier to cope with. Brains are also really funky, what will completely tear apart one person might not another. The thing with DID is that the trauma is continuous and repetitive from an early age, rather than say one bad event.

#did #did system #dissociative identity disorder #did osdd #did systems #did alter #actually did #dissociative system #asks

mysticalghosts

One of the aspects of did/ossd i hardly ever see others talking about is the height dysphoria.

Some of our alters are children, therefore they are much shorter than our adult body. It causes all sorts of back pain, because when they are fronted they will slouch in order to see the world from the perspective they are used to.

Does anyone else experience this to an annoying degree? We will often know when children are fronted because we walk around the house hunched over so much it aches.

subsystems

Things that can happen in DID/OSDD but people don’t talk about them as much:

An alter being co-conscious or influencing you without you knowing.

Being aware of a co-con alter but not knowing who they are.

Having difficulty telling apart your inner experiences. (Was that an alter or was I just feeling differently or was I just daydreaming?)

Having difficulty identifying your own emotions. (I feel “something”)

Knowing how to do something yet feeling like you don’t or shouldn’t know how to do it. (How do I know how to use this phone? I feel like it’s 1998 when I didn’t know what a phone was yet.)

Being in a familiar place/situation yet feeling confused, like it’s unfamiliar. (I’ve lived in this house for 7 years but I feel like this is my first time ever being in it.)

Being confused that your body is smaller/taller than you thought.

Feeling or being unable to do things that you normally can do at other times. (I just couldn’t drive the other day. I don’t know how. I just forgot how to do it.)

Things that happened a few days ago feel like months ago, or things that happened months ago feel like a few days ago.

Experiencing pain, headaches, visual impairment, or other physical symptoms that doctors can’t find a cause for.

Waking up as a different alter than the one who went to bed.

A co-conscious alter being able to influence or take control of certain body parts (like using the arms to hold & comfort you).

Being unable to tell if you’re dreaming or awake.

Feel free to add on!

Hello again!

I'm the girl from the questions in the last post. I needed to thank you HUGELY for all the time and energy you have used to clarify my doubts. I find it hard to believe how many dots were connected in my mind. 😅

Maybe it's more obvious than it seemed to me, but you explain with stunning clarity (I suppose you've had to do it many times). The difference between minutes before reading you and now is abysmal.

You have not used any inappropriate language, unlike me, and know that I have read you with great humility and attention.

I was interested and even moved, above all, for the third answer. I first assumed that if the DID was caused by trauma, then part of recovery must strictly include "returning" to the previous state of mind. However, and I say this as someone dealing with the consequences of trauma who doesn't have DID, that's impossible, with or without DID.

I think I also approached the non-human alters incorrectly. From your explanation I seem to understand much more, but just to make sure: since there is not only one valid alter, the same person can be Linda or Tom. But it can't be a stone. Now, you can have an alter that is, because not all alters fulfill the same function and it is more complex than that (I'm going to be very happy if any of that is correct, oh Lord).

Something that, I don't think, but I definitely approached incorrectly was the last question. From the outside, when, for example, family members talk about people with DID as if they don't have it and the disorder is something separate, an appendage that can be removed, they tend to refer to terms like that because, I suppose, they still see Tom as just Tom and they also assume that his mind works like theirs. My question has to do with that error, of course: to learn about others from oneself instead of the other way around. I am very sorry and I am also very grateful that you have corrected me so accurately.

I think my hypothesis was that, since each case is different, if a person's alters were, mostly, rather rough outlines for specific situations and not so "fragmented", so that the person maintained certain sense of identity, or the predominance of an alter, then they would feel more "intervened" in their identity than "confused" before finding a diagnosis. I don't know if it's possible, I think that's what I was trying to say.

From your explanation I understand that the "Tom" prior to the trauma would be as if not more fragmented, and my idea seems now like something out of a rather bad and childish Hollywood movie. In addition, without taking into account the DID, I don't know what link a child would have with his family in the face of such an emotional blow, whatever its origin.

I don't know if it makes sense or not, but perhaps I was thinking this: knowing that oneself is Tom, Susan's brother and with x characteristics, but at the same time oneself is Julia, and Julia hasn't spent that much time fronting, so does not consider that she has sisters. Thanks to your explanation and rethinking all possible alters as indisputably part of the same person, it makes more sense.

Thanks again, and sorry for my ignorance. I hope I didn't use any offensive terms this time, and if that is the case, I apologize in advance.

A pleasure to learn from someone so generous. I really admire what you do.

Regards!

I’m glad I was able to make provide clarity, I’ve done a tremendous amount of research and combined that with my own experiences as well as those of fellow systems as I find you tend to get the same basic information through google searches.

And trauma is something that tends to have lifelong effects. Therapy can help a lot, but memories and habits can linger, and even those with our DID will have omitted memories, and the brain does not let those come to light easily. DID is tricky because even if a final fusion occurred that person is at risk for splitting again, as it’s what the brain is used to and brains love patterns.

I’m not entirely sure I understand what you meant in the part of human & nonhuman alters but I shall do my best! We can get blurry, where multiple alters melt together, as well as being cocon. And alters that are inanimate objects can exist, I’ve heard it’s more rare but considering how complex and vast trauma can be I wouldn’t be surprised by it.

As far as families, many simply deny it. The abuse can be orchestrated or allowed by family members, and they don’t want to admit it, and even if they did everything in their power to try to prevent it and it failed, no one wants to admit that their precious little angel has DID, because they feel that they’ve failed as a parent and will be judged. And since so little is commonly known it’s easy for them to dismiss it as make believe, and say they would have noticed, when it truth people usually don’t unless you point it out.

And the feeling of identity is interesting, most people don’t realize what is going on and simply assume it’s normal. I thought everyone had lots of voices in their head. I thought that I just had a bad memory, and for years actually thought I was schizophrenic. Often times the host believes that they are the only one. And even when it was blatantly obvious, I kept avoiding it, because getting a diagnosis means coming to terms that what happened was that bad and that you were traumatized and that the people who were supposed to keep you safe failed to protect you. Yes, knowing what is going on your head is great, but denial is very very strong, because acceptance means that the version of reality you know is wrong and much of your past could have been a lie.

And considering the family of the body family is definitely correlated to how much time you spend fronting! I do consider them to be family while someone who fronts less may not.

And you didn’t use any offensive language this time! My goal is to be able to educate people, resources are difficult to come by but this blog gives me the opportunity to create a space where anyone can ask questions and get an answer and help destigmatized DID.

#did #did system #did osdd #did systems #dissociation #endthestigma #mental health awareness #plural system #awareness #destigmatize

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Hello!

Firstly, I wanted to tell you that I really appreciate you giving others the opportunity to educate themselves on anything related to the multiple personality disorder. Being willing to do it is almost never easy (totally understandable). I completely agree with your account name. If it's not a bother, I'd like to ask you some questions that came to me while doing research on this topic. I don't have this type of disorder, but as a neurodivergent and empathetic person in general I don't feel good with the little information I have.

Some of the questions will be in form of statements, because they are conclusions that I reached by reading, but obviously I do not assume that they are true. I would be very grateful if you could instruct me regarding any of these or what you consider appropriate. I don't want to stop apologizing for the ignorance that my vocabulary probably contains. I'll cover this from a point of view that doesn't reveal most angles, and I'm sorry if any of that makes someone uncomfortable.

I'll start then:

This type of disorder only develops from an extremely traumatic event during early age, when the person is still developing their personality. You are not born with this disorder. Is that true?

I understand how a person can be, for example, Dean and John at the same time. But some people report having non-human alters. How is that possible? What kind of fragmentation occurs?

While this fragmentation is not technically a bad thing, I've read that some people don't want to heal, or "fusion", or whatever. I understand that there are different terms to describe different stages. Would it be wrong to tell a person in this situation that although their identities are respected, since right now they are more than one person at a time, they could be cured and it is not good to deny them that cure? I'm not saying "it can be cured" in the sense that if you don't, you're going to be a bad person, but I can't think of how it could be a good idea not to reverse symptoms that have fragmented a healthy development.

Do you know valid percentages regarding the rate of people fully recovered from this disorder?

Can it happen that some personality does not feel part of the family to which the real personality belongs? Is it valid to say "real personality"?

Sorry for rambling too much, I hope not being bothering. Once again I thank you. I hope my doubts are useful.

Have a good day!

Sorry for taking so long to answer this, but here you go! I’ll also number my answers for ease of correlating then to the correct question. Keep in mind that ages and specific experiences vary from person to person, thus why I often say “usually.” I also want to make it clear that while my language may sound harsh, this is not directed at you, I simply wanted to convey the information in a clear and concise way.

1. True! People aren’t born with DID. DID forms when repetitive trauma is experienced at a young age, often seen as before the age of 8, though there is speculation that it could happen with trauma occurring up to around age 13 in children who take longer to develop mentally. The child simply cannot deal with what is happening, so the brain creates a separate “person” to deal with the trauma. Depending on the type of trauma and the extent to which the child can handle it different types of amnesia can occur. In full blown DID (so to speak) you usually end up with total amnesia, meaning you don’t remember anything, while many people with OSDD (other specified dissociative disorder) have reported feeling emotional amnesia, where they can remember the event but have no emotion attached to it, or it can feel like walking a movie. Often you can get a mix of both, where the worst will be completely omitted but with lesser events the emotions may simply be removed, though it will vary from system to system. So while no one is born with it, the severity of dissociation and amnesia depends on each child, the trauma, and how it is experienced.

2. “Two people at once” could actually refer to a number of things! Most commonly to being cocon, when two or more alters are sharing control. They may trade off who does what, or one may simply be there to enjoy the ride! And nonhuman alters tend to happen when the child is alienated or being nonhuman provides safety. Religious trauma could cause an alter who is a demon or angel for example, and animal alters can come from corresponding abuse. While these are more common, it’s entirely possible to have an alter that could be something like a rock, for example this would allow them to be “outside” the trauma and just an observer.

3. This is a pretty complicated point, and there isn’t necessarily one “cure.” DID is a vast and complex disorder that looks different in everyone, so what could work for one system may not work for another. Being “cured” or “fixed” are controversial in terms as they imply something is broken, and while you can definitely argue that splitting is breaking apart the consciousness, it can also imply that it should not have happened and that the child should have stayed “whole.” And our head mates can feel like family, we’ve been with them practically our entire lives, and while to some systems final fusion (where only one “identity” remains) can be the dream, it can feel like murder to others. Fusion is when two or more alters fuse together to create one, however it’s a very tricky topic. While you can get amazing results, such as two very fragmented parts forming a more complete part, just one alter not wanting the fusion to occur can cause a lot of chaos and disorder within the system. Final fusion would also require the sharing of all memories as only one alter would be left, something not everyone wants to do. Many systems instead have a goal of functional multiplicity, meaning they do not plan on working towards a final fusion, but rather on perhaps the fusion of fragments to create more “complete” alters and to improve communication and break down amnesia barriers. While wanting to be “cured” should seem like a universal want, but it’s so much more complex than that. As above mentioned, calling it a cure can imply that the dissociation resulting from the trauma was “wrong” and that the child should have “dealt h with it.” While this is rarely what people mean it’s how it often comes across. Final fusion, and even functional multiplicity require tremendous amounts of work as well. Alters that are designed to function in day to day life by not remembering trauma might not be able to function suddenly, so it could potentially require a job that would allow you to take the necessary time off. It can mean extensive years in therapy, and can require a trauma specialist which can be expensive and hard to find, especially since DID is so under discussed even within psychologists. And the idea of being all alone in your head can be terrifying. If you spent most of your life working with a team of people, each with a role to conquer life, suddenly having to do all of it on your own can be terrifying, and it comes with the reality of what can feel like loosing friends, family, and even partners. So you can work to reverse the negative symptoms without final fusion, which is the goal for many while others work towards final fusion.

4. As said above, “fully recovered” is not easy to define. Unfortunately the statistics don’t look super good. Up to 72% of people with DID either have or will attempt suicide. And substances and the risk of addiction poses a huge threat as well. Depression and anxiety are common, and seeking help is terrifying. Many also end up in and stay in abusive relationships as well, and the lack of specialists and the difficulty of escaping abuse can make any sort or recovery extraordinarily difficult.

5. “Personality” tends to be seen as an outdated term, and “alters” or “parts” is now generally accepted, though some systems prefer one term or the other, and there’s nothing wrong with like one term and not another! The “real personality” you’re referring to is what was commonly referred to as the “core,” or the “original.” However those are also seen as outdated terms, and tends to imply that one had more right to exist than another. the “original” can be just as fragmented, if not more so than other alters, and is not necessarily set apart when categorizing. Rather, the host tends to be what people think of, as many assume that the “host” and “original,” (so to speak) are the same when that often isn’t the case. Many systems will refer to biological family as the “body’s family” or simply as theirs depending on how long they have been host. Who the host is can change over time as circumstances and needs change, and many systems have a host team, or a group of alters who front frequently to walk through day to day life!

Tldr; people aren’t born with DID, nonhuman alters are typically caused by severe trauma that dehumanizes the child, healing looks different for everyone and many dislike the idea of being “cured,” healing is very hard and time consuming, alters may not feel any relation to the body’s family at all, and the term “real personality” is very outdated as well as offensive.

#did #did system #did osdd #did systems #dissociation #endthestigma #mental health awareness #plural system #awareness #destigmatize #education

obi-troll-kenobi

Picrews I use for online RPG

Got into online roleplaying? Your DM needs a character token and you want something else than google-searching random people’s art that may fit your character’s description? Or are you a DM looking for quick NPC tokens and portraits? Try these picrews!

(This is a completely personal post, my intention is to keep these as in-setting as possible so I’m omiting the overly simplistic styles and anime styles, especially that naime ones rarely have decent dark skin tones. I’m pretty sure there are tons of different amazing makers but I tried to cover those with fantasy options)

Humanoid characters:

Baydews avatar maker V. 2.0 - Supports characters in fantasy settings. Supports heterochromia.

Tiefling maker - Great for characters in fantasy settings, not only for Tieflings!

Djarn’s character maker - No clothing choices for fantasy settings, but it’s a very detailed realistic portrait maker.

Bright’s picrew hell - A bit more cartoonish but has a lot of options for humans and fantasy creatures. Supports heterochromia.

Cute D&D character creator - Something more lighthearted if you want to see your OCs as cute chibis.

Murmur Character Creator - Not many fantasy options but it’s good for creating a nice character portrait.

Dragon Age elf/human maker - For fairly realistic fem elves and humans

The Dragon Prince Elf creator - The Dragon Prince style, elves/elvish characters, has horn options too. No clothings.

Hadingley Hill maker - medieval/renaissance portrait maker

Fantasy Icon Maker - For fantasy characters. Supports heterochromia.

Fantasy icon maker - another nice maker with many options

Fantasy girl - elvish/human fem characters

Fantasy Hero Creator - Simple maker bu has some nicely detailed elements

Female human&elf / Male human&elf - a detailed fantasy maker

Muscular female / Muscular male - a detailed fantasy maker for buff characters

Fairytale duet M/M | F/F | F/M - Humans/elves, realistic skin tones only.

Mystical elf maker - Cute elf fem portrait maker

Elvish character creator - Elf fem. Limited for realistic skintones but nice clothing and background choices

AATAVEITH CHARACTER CREATOR - Human/elf fem. Natural human colors only but many clothing options.

Mermaid Maker - Fem mermaid or humanoid

Witch Doctor - Fem only

Victorian Steampunk Dressup - A detailed steampunk character maker

Elven Fashion - Fem elf only. Realistic skintones and some nice clothing.

Enchanter Maker - Fema elf/human

Deity maker - Lots of creative options for inhuman characters. Base/lineart only

Makowka character maker II - Not many fantasy option but ir’s a cool maker anyway

Nellseto’s maker - cute portrait maker

Black Centered Picrew - Very nice maker with huge variety of black haistyles

Wervty’s Chime Picrew - portrait

Wervty’s Gasp Chara Creator - waist up character

TTRPG Isometric Token - Full fantasy character token.Base/lineart only

TTRPG Portrait Token - Same as above but for character portraits. Base/lineart only

Sci-Fi fantasy portrait maker - Detailed fantasy and scifi/Star wars themed character portraits

portrait maker - masc postrait, very clean and nice artstyle but doesn’t have option for natural dark skintones

sci fi oc - Star Trek focused character maker

KorinMalin’s icon maker - humanoid portrait maker, natural skintones only

BunnyMoss’s OC Maker - Fantasy character maker

heads n shoulders - Fantasy-oriented, supports heterochromia and colored scleras.

fiammazzurra’s avatar maker - Supports heterochromia and colored scleras.

Nonhuman Creator - Fullbody chibi focused on non-human humanoids.

Cybebully Character Maker - Supports fantasy characters and colored scleras

Boy Time - Masc fantasy characters

A basic demon creator - Horned demonic character creator

Create A Cambion - another creator horned demonic species

Kaiju’s Character Maker - A simple fantasy-oriented maker

over the shoulder - portrait maker with tons of options

RPG Husband Generator - Fantasy-oriented muscular masc portrait

cute chubby maker - not many fantasy options but a good choice for fat characters

NuclearVessel’s OC Maker - Humans/elves, lots of colorful skin tones.

Windswept Maker - Portrait creator with some fantasy options

Fantasy Character Maker 3000 - Detailed fantasy-oriented maker, but requires some manual adjustments.

KZ’s dolls - nice portrait maker with some fantasy options

Plant’s OC Creator - Nice variety of natural skintones and a few fantasy skintones. More modern clothing.

Androgynous picrew! - Fantasy characters with animal friends.

PotatoLord’s Persona Creator - Nice veriaty of options but no eye color customization.

Kavren Character Creator - Another cool picrew, but there aren’t many fantasy clothing options.

Pixel Fantasy Character - fantasy-oriented picrew for pixelart character portraits.

Mega Fantasy Creator - Extremely detailed fantasy-oriented maker with tons of options.

Forest Fairy - Fem fullbody with a nice choice of fantasy clothing

Non-humanoid characters:

Dracthyr Maker - For all your dragons and dragonkin

Dragon PNGtuber Base Generator - Dragon base/lineart only

DnD Frog Maker - Frog people

Catfolk Maker - Cat people

Dragonborn - dragon people

Wolf / werewolf designer - Wolf face portrait with many nice options

Werewolf - fantasy werewolf

Anthro character creator - Various animal people

Dragon - Dragon base/lineart only

Dragon - Dragon portrait

Animals:

Wolf&dog - Fluffy friend custimizable with apparel

felidaze’s cool cat creator - Cats with lots of options

Wolf Maker - simple wolf creator

My Froggie - Fantasy frogs

Mouse Warrior - For all you Mouseguard/Mausritter players!

RATS!! - Realistic rat portrait maker

gay rat maker - realistic fullbody rat with apparel

Mouse Guard Maker - Creator for Mouse Guard characters

Dream Horse Maker - Horses

Cat Maker - Cats

Avian Creator - Birds

Fantasy Bird Creator - birds

Realistic Goat maker - realistic goat with lots of options

serval creator - Serval portrait

kittycat maker (wip) - fullbody cat

horse - realistic horse portrait

Pigeon - Fullbody pigeon maker

Rat maker! - fullbody rat

Rats - Fullbody rat

Gecko maker - fullbody gecko

Doberman Maker - fullbody doberman dog

Fighting Cats - two fullbody realistic cats

Horsesona maker - fullbody horse/pony

natural cat maker - fullbody cat

Horsemaker - realistic fullbody horse

cat maker - fullbody cat

Cat - Fullbody cat with gear

Hoof & Antler - Fullbody deer

This is a resource for private online gaming between you and your friends, no commercial/advertisement usage!

#reblogging as could be useful for systems #finding a good picrew can be HARD #picrew #resources #dissociative identities #did alter #did systems #did osdd

remnantfuck

how to make peace with myself as an introject?

remnantfuck

@bone-marreaux hello, replying and tagging in this post as to not reveal our main, but i was mainly talking about how to make peace with myself even though ive done horrible things in my source-- i know i technically havent done those things in this life, but its still difficult living with myself sometimes, with the guilt and self hatred i have due to my source. its hard to word, but if you have any advice, id appreciate it :) 💜

many-but-one

Hey, no problem. That way I get to put this on our system account because I feel like this is actually a much more common phenomenon than you realize.

I'm unsure if you are a fictional or factual introject (I'm assuming fictional), but both can feel these feelings. I'm going to talk about some of our introjects to kind of explain how to separate from some of these feelings of shame.

So, the purpose of introjects at all, both factual and fictional, are typically for system protection. So whether you come from a fictional source or from a real life horrible person, your brain saw that and was like "I need this for our protection." In the case of a fictional introject, it may be because deep down your brain was like "same hat" and grabbed you from the source and took the parts it needed and left the parts it didn't. So I can see that you feel guilt for your source's actions which means that clearly you are not the horrible person your source was. More likely, brain saw your source and was like "holy shit, this guy was ____ like me." (Fill that in with whatever you feel brain may have felt close to at the time.)

An example with one of our fictional introjects, April, who is an introject of Samara from The Ring, she saw that Samara was treated terribly by her parents despite just wanting love. That hit home REAL hard for her. Realistically, April would NEVER hurt people the way Samara did, even if she felt like the people would deserve it. She doesn't condone those actions at all, even if she understands them. She doesn't feel guilt because she's not massively source-connected, but I can understand that if she WAS more connected to the source, she would be rather distraught by it.

The same sort of thing with abuser introjects. They are NOT those people, no matter how much they believe they are. It's almost like an alter split and grabbed a template or even wears a mask/bodysuit of that person because the brain was like "This person will keep us safe." Which might seem backwards as all hell, but with abuser introjects especially, these parts will typically prey on insecurities or reinforce negative thought processes. (Gonna go on a small tangent here) A really REALLY good post about why persecutor parts act the way they do was done by ericawillyworms on instagram. The post is linked HERE but I will kind of break it down for you further.

If a persecutor/abuser introject/etc says you are "attention seeking" or "stupid" what they might really be doing behind the scenes is keeping you from reaching out for help or keeping you from believing you are smart. Why would this be effective? Well, especially as a child, these thought are "helpful" because when you are around adults that don't care about you, if you try to seek attention you desperately need, you may be shunned or punished. If you believe you are smart and try to talk about things you have knowledge of, you may be admonished or ignored. This is incredibly emotionally painful as a child, and so to protect yourself from this emotional whiplash, persecutor parts will try to keep you from doing the actions at all by making you believe you are unworthy of even attempting such actions. Deep down, persecutors probably don't really think that. Or if they do, they may more likely think it about themselves. Persecutors are very often trauma holders who have been very hurt. This is not to say that their methods are bad or shouldn't be done--however often times in the "now" or "after you are away from the unsafe place" (if your "now" still isn't safe), these actions and methods aren't quite as effective anymore and just causes undue shame. Persecutors do what they do for a reason even if it doesn't seem like it. (even if it doesn't seem like it to them!!)

So, back to your question, which I somewhat derailed from, to work on helping yourself feel less shame over what you have done in source, I would recommend working on source separation. This is absolutely essential for eventual healing, both for factual and fictional introjects. It's okay to still interact with the source if it brings you comfort, but eventually it's very important to start working towards understanding "I may look like that person or have memories of life as that person, but I am not that person." I know you say that you know you aren't that person, but I wonder if you really believe that? Additionally, is this guilt on what your source has done something YOU internalize on yourself or is it more something along the lines of "I don't want to tell people who I came from because that will make them think I am a bad person when I am not."? Those are two very different scenarios. Either way, source separation is a must.

"Many, you said 'do source separation!' But how?"

Glad you asked. :)

As someone who fused with an introject who was massively steeped into his source and was resisting source separation for a long time (and then later actually DID source separate, which was not only much better for his own mental health but better for the system as a whole), I've got some tips. :)))

So Foster is the guy I'm talking about above. He fused with Jules a few months back. If you search the Foster tag on our blog, he talks a lot about source separation and how necessary it is. The character he was an introject of was seriously a fucking HORRIBLE person. Our brain cherry-picked the parts that were needed (highly social, flirty, comfortable with sexual situations, very confident) and rejected the parts we didn't (murderer, rich asshole, child abuser). He was a fictive of Reaver from the video game Fable III. Foster tried so fucking hard to be like him (not in the bad ways) but simply couldn't because he was NOT him. He never had been and never would be.

So to start working on healthy source separation, he did a few things:

-Changed his name from Reaver to Foster.

-Stopped consuming his media constantly (still looked at fanart, but tried not to watch gameplay of his character in the beginning. After he was properly source separated and saw himself as a separate entity, he could once again enjoy his media.)

-Forced himself (mainly because James forced him to, but still) to stop having a British accent. He still slipped into it on occasion, but he was able to successfully adopt the body's midwestern accent.

-Let himself enjoy things that his source would enjoy but not BECAUSE his source would enjoy it. (Parties, going to bars, drinking alcohol, dressing fancy, etc.)

-Let himself enjoy things that his source would NEVER enjoy. (Hanging out with kids, monogamy, non-decadent dishes such as macaroni and cheese or simple grilled chicken, soda, being a kind person.)

-Creating mood boards based off what HE wanted to be that was NOT related to his source. So yes he still was very into steampunk, Victorian fashion, NSFW stuff, etc, but there were many things that he enjoyed other than that and he let himself indulge in creating things that were for HIM and him alone. "Lightly inspired by source" as he would say, but still all him.

-When seeing art, writing, etc, of people depicting his source as a horrible person--blocked. Or simply ignored. He didn't need to see it. When seeing artwork or writing depicting his source as a positive person (what he wanted to be, deep down), he would consume THAT version of the media instead. Unfortunately since his source is so obscure, this was difficult to find, but there is a small fandom of Reaver-stans out there that we certainly have thanks to give to😂

-Making other system and non-system friends that don't see him as his source, even if he tells it to them.

-Or, better yet, just not telling anyone his source unless something like that happens to be brought up.

---

Alright! I think that's pretty much all I have. What I'm mainly seeing in your case is that even if you understand deep down you aren't that person, you still feel very deeply "source connected" which is why when seeing your source be a terrible person in whatever fashion that may be, it brings you a ton of pain. I hope this helps you in some way, and if you have further questions, feel free to ask. I may also co-opt pieces of this post for future posts as I think this is a very important topic of discussion.

Have a lovely rest of your day,

-Dorian

#^^^^^#everything that Dorian said here #it’s a long post but worth the read #also if you’re worried about blocking people #blocking is not rude #they will never know you blocked them #it doesn’t hurt them on any way #but it DOES protect you by filtering out content they post which may upset you

sunflowers-and-scarce-spoons

abled ppl who insist they aren't ableist are actually so chill with eugenics until you call it eugenics

"well offering euthanasia to people with disabilities who can't afford to live is–" eugenics. it's eugenics.

"why do disabled people have children? I mean they're just consigning them to this painful life–" eugenics <3

"but their quality of life is so reduced how can they justify bringing kids into–" ✨eugenics✨

"maybe medicine has advanced too far. I mean why are we keeping people with [insert condition here] alive when their quality of life–" EUGENICS

idc if you're ✨concerned✨ for my ✨quality of life✨ that's a) not your problem and b) something which could be improved by providing better accommodations for disabled ppl and making sure we have to deal with less ableist bullshit and ableist assholes like yourself.

theescapesystem

Tw: dysphoria talk

Being a non-human in a system is a whole new type of dysphoria feeling when fronting. Not only is it a different body but you may feel like you're losing parts/limbs or as if certain things don't move as they should. I just wanted to say I'm proud of every alter that has to go through that. You are very strong. -Jekyll

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education-over-demonization

We are not monsters.

We are not a party trick.

We are not seeking attention.

We are not murderers.

We are not something faked by our therapist.

We are survivors of a terrible situation.

#did system #did osdd #dissociation #plural system #did systems #osdd #endthestigma #mental health awareness #awareness #destigmatize #actually traumagenic #traumagenic #traumagenic system #trauma #did memes #did alters #did

tolovaj-escaped-deactivated2025

Sick sick sick of possibility of being fucking recorded every waking second by tiktok obsessed quasi celebs. Video titled something like "Caught him thinking he's the main character" but it was just a kid wearing headphones, looking out the bus window. Of course it was posted without his knowledge. Stop recording strangers and everything you see, nobody gives a shit and not everyone is happy to be on tiktok or youtube because of a moron with no braincells and an account. What could be a forgettable awkward moment is now permanently there for the victim of lackabrainis infested idiot to get anxious about forever.

ro-zden

Okay, this seems like a relevant thing to share today: I've been in this position. Back in college while on that student lifestyle, I somehow ended up with a pretty bad iron deficiency. How bad? I was not only sleeping too much, I was falling asleep everywhere -- in class, in the library, in cafes five minutes after drinking coffee. It was terrible. Anyway, during a class I enjoyed, I was sat at a table with a few classmates, and I started falling asleep while taking notes; nodding off, dropping my pen, startling awake and falling asleep again, until my head was on the table. No one seemed to mind, we were all going through it I guess, and my lecturer was nice enough not to make a big deal out of it.

Cut to the next day and I was in the Students Union, when a friend came up to me and told me how funny that video was of me falling asleep in class was. What? I asked her about it, what did she mean, who made the video, and she realised I literally had no clue about it. Kindly, she told me who to talk to and I thanked her. I was already upset, but I knew it wasn't the messenger's fault. So, I took to Facebook and messaged the girl who made the video -- a girl on my table in the class from before. I asked her about it, and she admitted it right away -- she took the video on her phone during class and posted it to her snapchat. That's how the other girl saw it, not to mention countless others.

Sorting this out was an absolute toil. I felt betrayed and violated that someone would do that while I was obviously not in a position to have any say about it. I lost friendships with the people who took the girl's side, as if it was no big deal or "funny". I had to tell the lecturer about it, because let's face it, that's a shit thing to allow to happen during class itself, the department moved to be more alert and proactive about restricting phone use in class, and all that girl had to do was give a half-hearted apology. The next semester, she was still openly using her phone in another class we had.

For a long time, I couldn't trust anyone who held their phone up around me, as if to take photos or video. It would make me so anxious and put me on edge. I never did speak to the people who cosigned her behaviour, who acted like it wasn't their problem that their bff video-recorded a person in class over their health condition without their consent.

I did eventually grow out of my anxiety around phones, and I resisted the urge to break that girl's phone, but, I will absolutely bring back that energy if I see someone record a stranger in public without their consent. Take it from someone who's been that target -- if you think it's okay, you deserve to get your shit wrecked.

ro-zden

I just want to add, in case anyone reads this and isn't sure -- yes, it is absolutely fine to reblog this, and in fact I encourage you to. If testimony from a former target of this behaviour is the one thing that makes it click for anyone thinking of doing it, if it makes them reconsider before potentially ruining a stranger's life, then my experience will be worth it for me.

Don't record strangers and put that shit on the Internet or social media without their consent.

angiethewitch

a "friend" of mine posted a video of me online once when I was in a psychotic episode. I was actively struggling and she thought it was funny to film me while I was hallucinating and talking to thin air while in an active delusion. I still struggle when people hold their phones up. a few months ago I was out with my friend and I looked really good and I felt really confident and I was just sat having coffee outside when a man walked past obviously fucking filming me. I was immediately reminded of that tiktok thing "pov you're a girl in a skirt/you're a girl in public" where girls would show men filming them and staring at them. i went from feeling cool and confident to feeling like public property. and I remembered being filmed while in an episode and got paranoid my friend wasn't real and this man was filming me because I was the haha funny crazy person talking to an empty chair because that had fucking happened to me before.

you film that homeless man laughing to himself and talking to an empty space? yeah he's probably psychotic. you film someone having a meltdown and screaming at nothing? probably also psychotic. you are taking advantage of someone's most vulnerable state and you think its funny and you want to get Internet clout for filming them. youre a piece of shit if you do that. I went from feeling safe around my old friend, feeling unjudged, feeling supported, to feeling used and unsafe and judged.

this shit overwhelmingly affects disabled, sick and mentally ill people. cut it the fuck out. the next time you think it would be funny to film the weird old lady talking to the trees, take a second and consider: would you like to have your most vulnerable moments immortalised on camera?

eroticcannibal

Also this shit can straight up get people killed. You don't know which people showing up in that video are in hiding. Posting ANY video taken in public is putting people's lives at risk.

More people than you would think are living in fear of violence if the wrong person finds them. Dont help abusers. Stop posting videos online without the explicit permission of every single person who appears in it.

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