[βThe terms βdissociationβ and βintegrationβ have long been synonymous with one anotherβmeant to signify that the only reasonable goal in working with splitting and compartmentalization must be the fusing together of dissociated parts to create one single βhomogenizedβ adult. Daniel Siegel, however, makes a strong case against defining integration as fusion. He asserts (2010a) a different view: βIntegration requires differentiation and linkage.β Before we can integrate two phenomena, we have to differentiate them and βownβ them as separate entities. We canβt simply βact as ifβ they are connected without noticing their separateness. But, having clearly differentiated them so they can be studied and befriended, we then have to link them together in a way that fosters a transformed sense of the clientβs experience, facilitating healing and reconnection.
A part can be connected to the past, to a physical movement or body sensation, to particular emotions. Another emotion can be noticed, related to a younger or older part, and then linked to the reaction of other parts to those same feelings. In the wake of trauma, individuals need to be able to connect implicit memory to trigger and link the trigger to an explicit context. New information about the present must be linked with old perceptions shaped by the past. To feel safe today, a felt connection must be made between the βchild I was thenβ and the βadult I became today.β
Trauma-related vulnerability feels less painful when it is linked to new body experiences of mastery or to a somatic sense that βitβs overβfinally, now itβs overβ (Ogden & Fisher, 2015). Using Siegelβs definition of integration, fusion is not necessary nor is it as empowering as coherence, collaboration, and overcoming self-alienation.
In this chapter, we will focus on how to foster integration by differentiating parts previously denied, ignored, or disowned, connecting to them emotionally, and providing experiences that replace self-alienation and self-rejection with self-compassion and secure internal attachment relationships. When the emphasis in the therapy is not on the recall of traumatic events but on identifying trauma-related parts connected to the implicit memories that still affect the clientβs current experience, the need to disown the parts is diminished. When clients are helped to see their ashamed parts as βrealβ children of particular ages and to empathize with their littleness, their bravery, or their pain, disgust and fear give way to empathy. βShe looks so little,β clients say. βHe is trying so hard to be brave, but heβs really afraid.β βHeβs too ashamed to let me own anything niceβbecause if itβs too nice, heβs afraid that someone will take it away because he doesnβt deserve it.β Moments before they made these observations, all three clients had been blended with their parts.
Diane described being appalled that she had burst into tears when her boss criticized her performance: βI canβt believe I humiliated myself by being so weak.β Josh had been trying to replace his old car with a brand new one, only to find that his ashamed part could not let him buy something βnice.β Mark came to therapy to talk about his βspeechless terrorβ of speaking in public and the impact of this deficit on his professional life. In each case, the problem could be traced to a young part connected to particular times and events in the clientβs lives. Interestingly enough, I have a very clear sense of those young parts, but many of the events that wounded them were never described to me. I let the symptoms and the parts tell the clientβs story.β]
janina fisher, from healing the fragmented selves of trauma survivors: overcoming internal self-alienation, 2017
