Your offer to answer questions re: sex work is so generous, thank you. I'm wondering - what are some of the tropes you see in sex worker AUs (assuming you read that) that bother you most or ring least true to you? Thanks again!
Hello @bubbebruja & thank you for reaching out!! ❤️Sorry it took me so long to respond, this all still makes me very anxious so I had to rally myself, then I wrote this all out on mobile & lost it when Tumblr refreshed & had a bit of a fit 💩- so this is attempt #2. edit, months later: psyche lol I got anxious and fell asleep and forgot again (je suis trash) so here is attempt #3!!!!!
Short answer: falling in love with a client, closely followed by leaving the field upon entering a new relationship.
so my very-involved explanation/more info is under the cut! But first:
You can hear me talk in depth about sex worker au’s & a whole lot more with GallaPlacidia on her podcast! I was the sensitivity-reader for her camboy-Draco fic Exposure. She makes wonderful recordings of her stories on the GallaPod (I adore her posh-boy voice for Draco) and had me on for a follow-up interview about sex worker representation.
You can listen to the interviews with Galla on ao3 here, on Spotify (part 1) (part 2) or on online at podbean: (part 1) (part 2)
part one: “My friend Blue [that’s me!] and I discuss why the “down-and-out sex worker” trope we often see in Drarry and other fandoms is harmful, why these stories are so popular, and tips for fanfic writers considering writing sex work fics.”
part two: “What Blue wants to see more of in sex worker fics, the advice Blue gave me when I wrote Exposure, book and fic recommendations, and my actually quite strong feelings about cows.”
Working with Galla on Exposure was the first time I’d ‘come out’ or discussed sex work with anyone besides my very close friends or other sex workers so it was nerve-wracking and I was in a panic sweat the whole time! But Galla is fantastic, I have an easy laugh and we both have a sense of humor so it’s not at all a ~serious~ interview. My answers weren’t as clear or as strong as I would have liked them to be but for a first discussion I think it went well and I’d highly recommend giving it a listen.
I am hoping to someday write up a transcription of the interview but it is a slow, slow process so I don’t want to make any promises.
Click ‘read more’ for my answer to “What are some of the tropes you see in sex worker AUs (assuming you read that)*** that bother you most or ring least true to you?
Dating a client
Dating a coworker? YES! sexy! fun! Dating a client? NO!! run away real fast!!!!
This is an example of something that rings the least true (and I love that you asked about that aspect specifically). I’ve seen this attempted many many times in real life with sw’ers in different fields and with clients of different kinds. While there are exceptions to every rule, I have personally never seen it end well.
Sex work is fantasy intimacy and it’s a sales job. As a sex worker, you must maintain your clientele - you must maintain your desirability. This means focusing on a customer’s pleasure - both conversationally and sexually. As a stripper I might ask about say, my regular’s recent golf outing or fishing trip. I have no personal interest in golf or fishing, but it’s my job to entertain my customer, not the other way around. Maybe my client would be interested to hear about my art business or my cat or the book I’m reading & I’ll talk about them if asked. But they aren’t paying for my company, they are paying for the pleasure of my company. This means I share only the most palatable parts of myself- the parts that are both appealing and inoffensive.
As difficult as it may be for some people to believe, I find it genuinely rewarding to make people happy - but these are still imbalanced interactions. I am not bringing my full authentic self to the table. While I, the sex worker might be interacting with a client’s (more-or-less) authentic self they are interacting with a practiced, performed version of me. Every real-life tidbit that slips past the veil carries a multitude of risks from just losing a potential client (rent! groceries! childcare!) to risking physical and social safety (getting doxxed can do an incredible amount of damage). Who could be worth risking that?
Hand-waving it all, let’s say Character A (the sex worker) and Character B (the client) decide to meet outside the club, the hotel room or in plainclothes. Whatever it is, it’s no longer business as usual. When does money stop exchanging hands?
The foundational draw of sex work is financial agency. I cannot emphasize that enough!!! consider this: Why did the character A want or need financial agency in the first place? What kind of work could they switch to that would provide for them what sex work provided?
Here is me as an example! I have chronic pain and fatigue as well as chronic major depression among other sundry irritating and often debilitating ailments. Sex work allows me to both pay for better health insurance than I could afford as a waitress and enables me to pick up last-minute appointments in emergencies. I can also get sooner appointments with long-wait-list doctors by snagging their canceled slots no matter when they come. Having a flare-up? Can sense one coming in a day or two if I don’t take care of myself now? I can move my schedule around and disappoint my clients or annoy the club manager all I need and I don’t risk losing my job when I prioritize my healthcare!! No matter how I met them or how incredible they might be, if someone asked me to leave the field for whatever reason I simply. Would not do that. Could not do that.
Maybe character A does sex work specifically for need or want of a high income. If character B were to give A the option to stop working and let B take care of all of their financial wants and needs, they might say yes. But just how sure is A that B will provide this indefinitely? Are there conditions? How sure is A of B’s finances? How will A feel about bringing up problems in the relationship when B is entirely providing for them? Financial dependence automatically creates a power imbalance. No matter how well-intended and warm-hearted everyone is, the dependent is still beholden to the provider.
This is all just a leetle teeny part of why ‘leaving the field after entering the relationship’ is so unbelievable. There’s a whole lot more to go into but this post is already long as hell and it could really just go on forever. Here are some of the Other Fun Contributing Factors:
-A might engage in kinks/activities at work that don’t bother them but isn’t something they’re super into on their own time. That could be something B is really into and assumes since that’s what they’ve seen A do at work and that it feels as exciting for A as it does for B. Just. Sex is an even weightier conversation in general.
-If A stays in the field: that’s how they met B, B now has to overcome insecurity that A could meet a ‘new’ B the same way (how are they sure they’re special).
-B was as a client, why were they a client? What services were they seeking? Would A be comfortable with them continuing to seek these same services or is this something A is able or expected to attend to within the relationship.
I am officially Tired so I need to end the post here but I think it is clear that I have many words and concerns! And so can talk about this further when asked. Because! Fun: I can talk about how a relationship between SW and client could actually work. Because this is fanfic and we deserve fun and nothing is impossible!
@unexpected-readings-of-poetry I've talked to u abt this before & figured I’d tag you!
xx if there are typos etc please forgive me if I don’t hit ‘post’ this is getting lost in my drafts again and I refuse to let that happen a third time kisses xx
if you would like to support your fandom-local sex worker who is currently super unemployed bcs of fun fun medical reasons, tips would be super (!!!!!!) appreciated! venmo is @/bunnym00N, cashapp is $imisscalifornia and my ko-fi is @/blueghoul (many options! not at all confusing!!)
much cooler is my art I think! I scavenge flowers and other things and put them in resin and then they become earrings: Instagram / Etsy
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Draco, Harry, Hermione and Ron. I learned so much working on these! Please let me know who is your favorite - or which reading nook you’d prefer to curl up on.
I adore the friends I do have immensely but god it would be nice to have like five people living nearby who I could call on for help or to hang out at any given moment
it’s also a very hopeful narrative. Found Family imparts this idea that you don’t have to start out life with a family, or with roots that go all the way down a family tree. That you’re not destined to be alone and without love simply because who you were born to didn’t make the cut. Found family resolutely insists that there is always a future, always a possibility for more, and that no matter how much time it takes to find them, they could always still be out there.
It’s about resolving loneliness, but it’s also about promising that you can find that relief later. It doesn’t have to be now, it doesn’t have to be when you’re little, it can be whenever it’s time.
For those of us without families in the traditional sense, or with families that had to be abandoned for any number of reasons, or even families that had to separate for long amounts of time, found family is proof that we didn’t miss out on love.
And I think when the world seems the darkest, it makes sense that a narrative about hope for the future and always having love on the horizon is popular. <3
It is also not insignificant to the found family trope that it isn’t just you looking for a family. They’re looking for you back, they want a family too (or sometimes they don’t want it until they have it and then they won’t give it up for anything and that’s good too). They are lonely and want what you want. There’s just something nice about the thought that you’re not alone even when you haven’t found them, that you’re not the only one looking, the responsibility does not fall squarely on your shoulders alone, and that maybe it will find you instead.
That night, I dream of standing in the middle of a tunnel. Potter is on one side, extending a hand and beckoning me to his side. On the other side, there is familiar darkness waiting to fold me into its cool, misty arms.
I look between both ends of the cave. I know the darkness, cowered within it. Potter's smile shines with foreign promise.
- a scene from life's like an hourglass glued to the table by @phoebe-delia 💙
I didn't expect for my name to be drawn from the hat when Helle first told us about this lovely endeavor but I was so so excited when mine came up!
It was so fucking hard to choose a fic but ultimately I picked this one because it was a turning point for me in terms of writing and figuring out my style. Plus, it's based on a song that holds a lot of significance to me.
Helle, my friend, you captured this so so so perfectly; better than I could've imagined. I can't believe this exists. I'm gonna go put it on AO3 with the fic and then stare at it some more.
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Here are some of my favorite fics from @hd-erised 2021. Listed in alphabetical order.
Beds, Knobs, and Broomsticks by @fencer-x [46k]
A long-term mission to the Baltics that will take him far away from London sounds like the perfect time to cash in the embarrassing ‘Butler in the Buff’ coupon Harry received as a birthday gag gift—until Harry winds up injured in the field and sent home to recover three days into the mission, obliging him to endure one full month of inappropriate attentions from horny housekeeper Draco Malfoy.
Beneath the Wave by @moonflower-rose [30k]
Harry is done with a life in the spotlight. No more adventures, no more mortal peril. He wants a quiet life of food and friends, and family. He even manages to have it for a while, until suddenly there are giant rabbits that need ferrying to a mysterious island, and a handsome Draco Malfoy, and Harry’s right back in the middle of the action again, despite his best efforts.
Come Up for Air by @shiftylinguini [13k]
In a train station in Northern Europe, while waiting to attend a Quidditch convention as the representative for Finland’s top Quidditch team, Draco Malfoy goes into heat.
Across the platform, Harry Potter notices. Because of course he bloody does.
The Ghosts of Hogwarts Past by @writcraft [30k]
Draco has hardly had time to bask in his promotion to Head of Slytherin House when he gets news of Harry Potter’s return to Hogwarts. With his increased workload, the reappearance of the ex he never got over, the ghost that won’t let him sleep, and some curious coded diaries, it’s shaping up to be a hell of a year.
Into You by @andithiel [28k]
There were many things that Harry had anticipated when arriving back at Hogwarts for his eighth year. Having his body switched with Draco Malfoy’s was not one of them.
It’s No Great Mystery by @agentmoppet [57k]
Who on earth decided that bringing back the Yule Ball for their eighth year would be a good idea? It feels like the worst day of Harry’s life, watching everyone get glammed up like the war never happened, like the last Triwizard Tournament wasn’t such a colossal failure.
And then it happens again. And again. And again.
Loverboys by @corvuscrowned [84k]
As post-war violence and tensions rise, it seems as if there’s no hope to unify the wizarding world. Except, maybe, a manufactured relationship between resident Saviour Harry Potter and known purveyor of the Dark Arts Draco Malfoy. (The fact that they detest each other is beside the point.)
But as Draco’s unrelenting mind games begin to wear him down, Harry has to remind himself that it’s all fake. The relationship is fake. The affection is fake. The pet names, the romance — even the engagement photos are fake.
But there’s something in Draco’s kiss that might just be real.
Take These Lies by @pennygalleon [19k]
There’s a portrait of his godfather in Draco Malfoy’s potions shop and Harry needs to know why.
But that’s not why he keeps coming back.
To Vanish Into Something Better by @m0srael [35k]
Harry Potter thought he could outrun the burden of infamy by isolating himself in the Muggle world. Draco Malfoy hasn’t been seen or heard from since his trial. Will a top-secret Ministry project, a beautiful garden, and a little heat carry them both home?
The Truth About Love by @amywaterwings [52k]
In which Draco is a high-powered magical divorce lawyer and Harry is the Unspeakable assigned to seduce him. It goes as well as one might expect.
Truths, Dares, and Love Affairs by @ronbinary [17k]
NEWTs are approaching, Mind Healing is mandatory, and something is wrong with the castle.
And then, there’s Potter.
Water, Shadow and Stone by Omi_Ohmy [53k]
Potions professor Draco notices DADA professor Potter’s increasing absences. He hates himself for caring, but where is he going? What is he doing?
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When there’s nothing left to burn, you have to set yourself on fire.
“I would love you if you were a bad person,” Harry admits, later, his mouth pressed to the back of Draco’s neck, darting his tongue out to catch the salt of sweat. “You have to know that. I would love you if you were the worst.”
Hi yes here’s more morally ambiguous criminals in love, I haven’t run out of “be gay do crimes” recs yet! So this is actually the second part of the summary: “If you wanted 8k of sexy arson, emotionally difficult arson, general arson, handkerchiefs, dread, and poetry curation, now is really your moment.” And I stopped thinking at sexy arson because how could I resist this sexy brand of unhinged?? I’ve been a fan of FFB since Open for Repairs (still one of my favorite Muggle Draco stories ever) and this fic called me like a siren with its clever, tense and cathartic vibes. Everything is original and bold, from the narrative structure to the precise economy of words, to these dark and complex characters bonding over their shared anger, and don’t get me started at those punchlines that make you wanna go back and reread every paragraph before moving on to the next.
Dark!Drarry is not a concept I explore often - and as much as I love this fic I’ve only read it twice - but something about the rationale behind their anarchism catches my breath, and makes me wanna learn more about them, their motivations and background, their fears and hopes. The non-linear narrative only adds to the plot tension and keeps you on edge while trying to put pieces and timelines together. It’s really interesting to watch Harry and Draco’s connection grow among the ruins of this grim, kinda apocalyptic post-war, that shapes not only them but every character in the story. It’s dysfunctional and heartbreaking but executed with such raw honesty, I just can’t look away.
This is a poignant read, rich and striking both in prose and style. The ambiguous ending may be too much to bear for some, but IMO it’s the perfect fit for this intense and melancholy love story born in a hopeless world, and I wouldn’t have it any other way. Happy sad Friday!
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Every week, on the Magical Trans discord server, we have a discussion in the trans-only channels about one topic regarding Harry Potter, fandom life and trans experiences.
This topic of this week's discussion was: Share about how you would like JKR's transphobia handled in the fandom. We talked about it and came up with a list of guidelines for a better fan space:
Have an explicit statement about your position on transphobia and JKR if you're an Harry Potter content creator. Staying willfully ignorant is participating in her transphobia and how it affects the fandom. We need an united front against her ideas, intentional measures to show that the Harry Potter fandom isn't in agreement with JKR.
Stop buying things that profits to JKR. That means no new official merch (Etsy offers a lot of alternatives), no going to the movies. For legal reasons, we're not telling you to download the new movies but... ahem.
Stop trying to command trans people's enjoyment. Telling trans people to stop engaging with fanworks and a fandom that bring them joy and a sense of community is not how you fight against transphobia. Making queer headcanons/content promotes the queer part of HP, not JKR herself.
Hype up trans creators and trans content!
Make trans content. Write, draw, edit, give us the casual representation we so deeply need! Do not hesitate to ask for a sensitivy reader around. (and tag us when you post, we would love to reblog!)
Make trans content outside of @hptransfest! This fest is awesome, wonderful and deeply needed. But it shouldn't be seen as the only occasion to write trans characters!
Spend some time thinking about any anti-trans logic that seeped into the book series and ensuring it stays out of fan work. That means no statement of anti-trans rhetoric: don’t assume there are only two genders, no blanket statements pitting men against women.
This is of course the opinion of a singular group of trans fans, not all of them in the fandom. You're welcome to join to participate in the discussions as a trans person or to become a better ally. The server is 18+. Link here!