foaming at the mouth but in a sexy way

i think i said this one before but i remember we used to go to church and one day on the way i just out of the blue asked the car "how do we know god is real? what if people just made him up" and the adults all got super mad at me and gave me generic answers like "we just know" and stuff and my ass was fucking CURIOUS so when church started i asked the Sunday School teacher and she was like "well the bible was written about him" or something like that and i was like "but someone wrote Curious George and hes not real, what if someone made him up too" and she was like irritated but was like "he's a talking monkey of course hes not real, children just like fun stories" or something like that and i don't remember exactly what i said but it was something very close to "but adults like stories too! how do you know he's not made up so because adults want to believe in something too?" and she got SUPER mad and i had to apologize in front of the church but i saw an opportunity so i was like "but no one answered me so i still dont know and i guess you guys don't either" and [everyone] got super mad and none of us could go to that church anymore

“progressive” men when a woman is deemed evil enough that they can call her a bitch 24/7:

I tell a woman with a 9 to 5 office job about the slightly niche speculative fiction novel I just finished and she goes "Oh, that's...interesting. I hadn't heard of that."

Someday people are going to post ads like this with captions like "the future we were promised..."