[insert fanfic title here]

cast & crew wages: $1,200 + uber eats

fake blood (assuming generous discount on bulk purchase): $2,000,000 i am so not kidding i did the math this is nuts

in another lifetime...🤍🖤

Part 2

Bonus: how Jabber actually learned that info I'm basing this off au of solbonbon (screen under the cut) with slight edits. Basically they were meeting for rematches all the time and Zanka has barely ever won and got poisoned often. I feel like Zanka could be very anxious person prone to intrusive thoughts due to shitton of stress so maybe Jabber isn't that much at fault here, but it def gives them a reason to keep hanging out Initially this was supposed to be more of a edgy/hot thing with like rage makeout after kicking each other asses but i had some weird mood the other day that created the image of intrusive though Jabber and i guess i really toned it down with softness but at the moment it felt VERY fucked up and i think Zanka was pressed by these intrusive ideas too

The original Tweet says "At a certain magnitude of cunt severity, getting misgendered by your family stops hurting and starts being funny. I have D cups, Grandpa. The waitress thinks you have dementia."

One of the lesser known early symptoms of dementia is that people start being more disagreeable.

Part of this is probably the natural result of being increasingly confused and upset day to day constantly. Another possible thing is that the same mechanism that causes dementia is also attacking the part of the brain that does emotional regulation.

anyway we like pacing around together and ranting in the attic but sometimes instead of pacing one of us will just hang on the pole and spin, and the other person will watch on the beanbag, which makes for these really goofy conversations where the person on the bag will say something that gets the other persons goat, such as, hypothetically, that xylophones do not belong in rock music, and then the other person will go on a tirade about this, but they'll actually only be facing the Hot Take Speaker half of the time, what because of the pole, so the response will sound something like

I can't believe

you would even suggest such

a stupid opinion. You've

been to a Danny Elfman

concert! How can you

have heard Oingo Boingo

live and say with a straight face

that they alone do not justify

rock and roll xylophones

and then that person will continue until they get too dizzy, then they'll get off the pole, and by unspoken agreement, the person on the bag will get up and trade places with them to deliver their rebuttal while also spinning and it just creates this sort of crazy strip-court lawyers debating absolute nonsense for no reason kind of vibe that frankly just really does it for us.