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daglout

The menu (2022) dir. Mark Mylod

rickybabyboy

Hi

hotvampireadjacent

anarchblr

ABOLISH POLICE AND FREE MY HOMEBOY DJ TOILET

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triskeleaficionado

radiantroach

Memes that really show tumblr's aging demographic

stophelping

Turn the reblogs back on coward

derinthescarletpescatarian

Who wants to hear a story about how stupid I am

forestuck

Isnt that why we’re on this website

derinthescarletpescatarian

Every single time I hear someone reference Madonna as still being alive (like when they mention her Tumblr or Instagram), my brain immediately goes, “wait, no. Madonna is very definitely dead.” Like, I am CERTAIN that Madonna is dead. It’s a rock solid fact of my existence, there’s simply no way she’s alive, that’s “proof you’ve woken up in a parallel universe” kind of shit.

Madonna is not dead. But I keep forgetting that, and being dead certain that she is. I remember watching documentaries about her, about her history of being abused at home and in the industry, about her courage and skill and how she was taken advantage of, about what an iconic actress she was. I remember the outrage when that Playboy jerk got buried next to her as “the ultimate blonde”.

Now, people more astute than me might have noticed that I have confused Madonna with Marilyn Monroe. I usually don’t get this far in the proceedings. I usually go, “oh, I must be confusing her with someone else. Who is it… oh, Marilyn! It’s the M’s that must be tripping me up!

“I’ve confused Madonna with Marilyn Manson!”

kaylapocalypse

Who is also still alive, though I genuinely wish he wasn’t.

derinthescarletpescatarian

I was confused by this reaction so I googled Marilyn Manson and it turns out I have also confused Marilyn Manson with Eddie Izzard.

scrumptiousangst

How many celebrity victims with this identity trolly claim before you find someone actually dead?

derinthescarletpescatarian

#I get those two confused too 😭#also. this is a safe space so I will ask#is marilyn manson not a serial killer

WHEN I REALISED MY MARILYN MONROE MISTAKE I ALSO THOUGHT THIS but no apparently he is a singer and I don’t know what the serial killer’s name is

alexseanchai

Charles Manson. Who is in fact dead.

lostsometime

To be fair, Marilyn Manson deliberately chose his stage name to reference Marilyn Munroe and Charles Manson, so he wants you to think of them when you say it. It’s kind of the point!

tribblehugger96-deactivated2024

okay but Eddie Izzard?

derinthescarletpescatarian

I just hear the name Marilyn Manson and I think “oh yeah that’s a genderpunk rockstar name”

And yes I did think that Eddie Izzard was a rockstar. I… may have gotten her a little bit confused with Ozzie Osborne.

maximumsunshine

Ok. Well Eddie Izzard is alive.

But you did finally stumble upon someone who is dead. Apparently Ozzie Osborne died literally 2 days ago.

the-shade-system

Great post everyone

derinthescarletpescatarian

#incredible#i also tend to think that Madonna is dead#but i always confuse her with Amy Winehouse. i don’t know how. but i always do

AMY WINEHOUSE IS DEAD???

mistakenot4892

She’s been dead since 2011.

Also Ozzie Osbourne isn’t dead.

crutchie-morris

In order of appearance in this post:

Madonna: pop singer, some of her most popular songs include Like A Virgin and Material Girl. Alive.

Marilyn Monroe: actress and model, known for her work in movies as a “bombshell blonde” and for her modeling, particularly with Playboy. See OP’s original post for details of her life. Died of drug overdose.

Marilyn Manson: singer/songwriter of metal/rock music (per Wikipedia, do not come at me about music genres.) Some of his more popular songs include The Beautiful People and Personal Jesus. Long history of controversy, including sexual abuse allegations. Alive.

Eddie Izzard: stand-up comedian and actress. Some of her more popular films include Ocean’s 12, Ocean’s 13, and Valkyrie. Known for running marathons to raise money for charities supported disadvantaged youth in the UK. Alive.

Charles Manson: serial killer and cult leader. Known for founding the Manson Family, a doomsday cult who went on a murder spree in 1969. Racist. Not worth spending any more time on. Died in prison from colon cancer.

Ozzy Osbourne: hard rock/metal singer, known for his work with the band Black Sabbath. Best known songs include No More Tears and Crazy Train. Has been the victim of many “this celebrity died!!” rumor storms, but at present, Alive.

Amy Winehouse: singer/songwriter, Wikipedia describes her music as “soul” (again, don’t come at me about genres.) Best known songs include Rehab and You Know I’m No Good. Died from drug overdose.

derinthescarletpescatarian

Best part is that none of these people look anything like each other

tundrakatiebean

Just to add some more confusion to this the reason Max thought Ozzy was dead was because there was a Twitter death hoax that got picked up by some fans not realizing it was a fake post and it snowballed a bit.

waywardworldhopper

…this is how I find out Aaron Carter died, huh?

scientificphilosopher

It wrinkles my brain that Jupiter’s moon Europa has oceans that are sixty miles deep, while Earth’s oceans only reach seven miles deep at most. I’m willing to bet good money that there’s life in Europa’s oceans. Like five bucks. You hear me, NASA? I bet you five bucks that there’s life on Europa… Now that there’s money and reputation on the line, I bet they send a mission there real quick.

curiousobsession101

I have no idea when this was originally posted, but NASA is working on their Europa mission RIGHT NOW to look for alien life! But get this, they theorize that because of the depth, gravity, and composition of the oceans, any organisms that lived there would be waaay bigger than aquatic life on Earth. So far everything’s going well with regards to their Europa mission so they should have a spacecraft on its way to look for giant sea monsters in space in only a few years. (The planned date is in the early 2020s.)

notsoterriblymisanthropic

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gummybearattacktheworldofdespair

daco-showman

literally nothing funnier than a newly born aquatic mammal realizing they've been cursed to live in water

normal-horoscopes

I'm taking tech training on my new job's primary software and it refers to all the functions as wizards. I was keeping it together but when I got to "The Global Wizard Access Wizard allows you to add and remove access to a group of wizards globally" I about lost it

Do not remove access

normal-horoscopes

Let me in

whydidisavethistomyphone

Source

weaver-z

Love it when an animal has a long tail for no reason at all. Look at this guy. Ridiculous. So silly.

so they can hold!!

MEIN GOTT

Largest self portrait in the world

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valtsv

the benefit of drinking coffee is that it unlocks pathways in your brain that were previously inaccessible to you. the problem is that some of those roads were closed for a reason.

ultragooner89

x

paxamericana

joke of a country

muffledpizza

Whoever on twitter said that the queen occupies the same position in UK politics as “the troops” do in USA politics was spot on

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