izzy's playlists!
I'd rather be in outer space 🛸
art blog(derogatory)
#extradirty
pixel skylines
NASA
Discoholic 🪩
KIROKAZE
Keni
One Nice Bug Per Day
EXPECTATIONS
Fai_Ryy
bliss lane
Monterey Bay Aquarium
The Bowery Presents
Cosmic Funnies
RMH
shark vs the universe
"I'm Dorothy Gale from Kansas"
seen from United States
seen from Malaysia
seen from United States
seen from Türkiye
seen from United States
seen from Poland
seen from United States
seen from Malaysia
seen from Argentina
seen from United States
seen from Türkiye
seen from Singapore
seen from United States
seen from United States
seen from United States
seen from Germany
seen from Türkiye
seen from United Kingdom
seen from South Africa
seen from Brazil
@conqueringlifeorepicallyfailing
sorry for [remembering a tumblr post about expressing gratitude instead of apologising to make the interaction more positive for the other person] i mean thank you for having a boyfriend who was so easy to run over withmy car and reverse over three times maybe four
Anya is live and ready to show you everything. Watch her strip, dance, and perform exclusive shows just for you. Interact in real-time and make your fantasies come true.
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Taking up Japanese as a side project for myself has reminded me of something.
So like a long time ago I had a professor that I absolutely adored. She happened to be Japanese American. She grew up speaking Japanese at home but never really spent a lot of time in Japan. She mostly spoke with other Japanese Americans and read books.
So one day early in her teaching career there’s an exchange student from Japan who’s having a hard time understanding a concept so she explained it to him in Japanese and then he looked absolutely rattled. Like in shock. Pale.
This is how she learned that the way she speaks Japanese makes her sound like a gang member.
Japanese doesn’t exactly have cuss words in the same way as English does but imagine that the nicest professor you’ve ever had pulls your paper over and says “Okay listen here you little piece of shit I’m gonna fucking explain this to you. Violently.”
I can clearly remember the moment I first realised my mother and I were living on completely different planes of existence. I was 7 years old and I came home from my school's first track and field day having placed second or third in every event. the teachers had been making jokes all afternoon about how many times they had to call my name. my friends thought I was cool as shit. my enemies thought I was cool as shit too, come to think of it. I was proud as hell. so I get home with the entire front of my shirt covered in ribbons like I was a military dictator who'd awarded himself every medal, I walk into the kitchen and tell my mum all about my day, and she goes "oh, that must be disappointing not getting any firsts." and I'm like no?? first of all the first place ribbons are red and I don't like red. second of all look at me. there's literally nowhere left on my body for accolades. I am fucking Jacked of All Trades. how could this possibly be a disappointment.
my corner store guy is a 50 year old man who's my best friend in the world and recently he was like "you're too pretty to be single I have some nephews you should meet. very handsome!" and I was like "a niece might be more up my alley" and he just got more excited and said "ah even better! I was overselling my nephews but my nieces are very beautiful"
OP the tags!!
everything coming full circle (2/∞)
Anya is live and ready to show you everything. Watch her strip, dance, and perform exclusive shows just for you. Interact in real-time and make your fantasies come true.
Free to watch • No registration required • HD streaming
Imagine unexpectedly popping up in Valhalla with your pants around your ankles because just half a minute ago you were taking a shit so bad that the Viking gods decided that it should count as dying in battle.
Isn't it even worse? You don't just pop up there. You get carried there by a Valkyrie.
You're experiencing a gastrointestinal event, and are really not having a good time, and the suddenly, without any logical way to be present there's a Winged Woman in there with you, in Armor, with Weapons and Helmet, who looks like she could take down Sandor Clegane or Geralt of Rivia in the 10 minutes before waking up, just plugs you from your porcelain throne and doesn't even gives you the chance to pull up your pants before carrying you off.
Elvis, pantsless, being carried from the mortal realm by a huge gorgeous Brawnhilda valkyrie: oh woah pretty mama where we going
@elvis-official how was it?
Imagine unexpectedly popping up in Valhalla with your pants around your ankles because just half a minute ago you were taking a shit so bad that the Viking gods decided that it should count as dying in battle.
Isn't it even worse? You don't just pop up there. You get carried there by a Valkyrie.
You're experiencing a gastrointestinal event, and are really not having a good time, and the suddenly, without any logical way to be present there's a Winged Woman in there with you, in Armor, with Weapons and Helmet, who looks like she could take down Sandor Clegane or Geralt of Rivia in the 10 minutes before waking up, just plugs you from your porcelain throne and doesn't even gives you the chance to pull up your pants before carrying you off.
Elvis, pantsless, being carried from the mortal realm by a huge gorgeous Brawnhilda valkyrie: oh woah pretty mama where we going
@elvis-official how was it?
I like when delivery people ask you to sign their tiny shitty screen with your finger like alright sure we can do some free drawing I guess. Some random strokes that evoke the essence of a signature. Looking me dead in the eyes while I play fruit ninja on this blank screen. Why not.
If you like frogs. Or possums. Or cool builds. Or happiness. This is the video for you.
Tags via @brawltogethernow
Anya is live and ready to show you everything. Watch her strip, dance, and perform exclusive shows just for you. Interact in real-time and make your fantasies come true.
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i was talking to one of my coworkers about my trip and she asked me where i was going and i said austria and she looked at me all confused and then she said “like…austria-hungary?” and i wasn’t quite sure how to break it to her
#i’ve been in a coma since 1914#i can’t wait to see my favorite modern empire (via elucubrare)
@badshah-cornelius
Im enjoying the longevity of tumblrs recontextualization style of humor. a seemingly innocuous post followed by like “posts that a gnome would make” or like “are you a phone”
STOP REBLOGGING THIS if this gets notes op is going to post the leonardo dicaprio pointing image
Congratulations this post officially has more notes than the one in the screencap. like a torch at the worlds shittiest olympics.
Hobby dentist????
[ID: A tweet and a photograph.
The tweet is by andrew kurjata (@akurjata) and it reads “A kid’s tooth fell out at school and no one could find it, so his vice-principal @shandeemay1 wrote this letter to the tooth fairy”
Attached is a photograph of the letter, on Hart Highlands Elementary School letterhead, which reads:
“January 12, 2021
Dear Tooth Fairy,
Today one of Gavin’s tooth fell out while he was getting ready to eat lunch. Unfortunately it was lost in the classroom, and despite the heroic efforts of a fearless search team, we were unable to recover it.
As a trained Vice Principal and hobby dentist, I can verify that there is definitely a gap in Gavin’s teeth that was not there this morning when he came in.
Please accept this letter as official verification of a lost tooth and provide the standard monetary exchange rate you normally use for a real tooth.
If you have any questions, please feel free to contact me at the address above.
Sincerely,
(Signature)
Shandee M. Whitehead
PS — I am still waiting for the money for my wisdom teeth from 2000. Please pay as soon as possible. I have bills to pay.”
End ID.]
@magnetothemagnificent
Awwwwwwwwwwwwww
Today I was peeing in a public restroom and overhead a bunch of women with babies st the basins talking about how much they wished genderless toilets existed because it would make caring for children all that much easier.
Their arguments was that caring for children is easier when you can have two parents nearby, especially when you need to manage multiple children. Not only that, another one added, but sometimes single fathers need to help little daughters go to the toilet and are faced with the choice of 1) occupying the disabled people toilet or 2) risking taking their little girls into men's restrooms and having her see someone at a urinal because that's the only way they can keep a proper eye on them. And another one complained that sometimes she needs to change her crying baby's diaper while her little girl needs to go to - and all of this would be easier if only mums and dads were allowed in the same spaces at the same time.
And all I could think about while I finished peeing and heard this was that genderless public restrooms are a female need and would probably be an unanimously held feminist demand (similarly to reproductive rights) if it wasn't for radfems who are so gassed by their hatred towards men and trans people that they refuse to move forward with what should be a very simple and reasonable demand.
that one friend who’s always cold: i’m cold
that one friend who can see ghosts: which is weird because you’re not even being haunted right now or anything
That one friend from Minnesota: you think THIS is cold??? This is summer weather where I’m from—
Ghost seeing friend: Minnesota on the other hand, SUPER haunted
Anya is live and ready to show you everything. Watch her strip, dance, and perform exclusive shows just for you. Interact in real-time and make your fantasies come true.
Free to watch • No registration required • HD streaming
party rocking with a mouse tonight
piece of cheese we're gonna have a big bite 🧀🐁
and we gon’ make you lose your rinds
we just wanna see ya.......... . squeak that
getting older as a kid is like yippee!! wahoo yay!! but then immediately as u enter ur early twenties ur like whoa lol hold on wait wait hold upa minute stop
illustrative guide
