all i see is plinth

ending a social interaction with a friend and thinking "I think we grew a little bit closer today." in my head as if I'm a dating game protagonist

im going to fix my entire life

When?

Like Um. later

it really is crazy how there are so many influencers with millions of followers i have never heard of in my life

every day someone is like ‘have you heard about the situation with johnny youtube?’ and i go. pardon. who the hell is that

you know when you’re eating a sandwich and you go to take a bite and like a huge chunk of your favorite part just slips out (like say your eating a blt and you accidentally pull out a whole piece of bacon) and you’re torn because on the one hand that bite is going to be the best bite ever but on the other hand the rest of your sandwich just lost a valuable team player 3 minutes into the game and no one’s sure how it’s going to be able to cover that loss.

who knew my most popular text post of the year would be about eating a sandwich

"it's just stress" oh thank god, it's just the silent killer that slowly kills you, perfectly harmless, no need to worry

yuri and yaoi are some of the best, most sacred things in the entire world

put Sam Reich on Taskmaster. i wanna see the psychosexual tension between him and Greg Davies.

If Ilya and Shane actually wrestled like no holds barred to the death full competition mode rough and tumble fighting, I think most of the time Shane would win. Shane is used to Ilya throwing him around and pinning him down, but Ilya gets tossed to the ground once and gets so turned on he passes out. Shane yells at him and pins him and he just gives up because he's so horny he cannot actually think. Their friends are like oh my god Shane you're hurting him! And Ilya is lying there under him so so so pleased like yayyyy I love being pinned by my huge sexy jock boyfriend #mysexyjockboyfriend DO NOT SAVE HIM he is exactly where he wants to be!!

this mfer tryna avoid a game of tag

LMAO

yeah im “transitioning” *dissolves into tiny pieces as i click to the next slide*

Is there a transfem version?!?

Nonbinary version?

happy pride month I fucking love powerpoint slide transitions and gender transitions

im going to fix my entire life

When?

Like Um. later